


Lost and Found

by love4writing



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:47:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 44
Words: 48,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28484124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love4writing/pseuds/love4writing
Summary: I wrote this to play with characters. There is canon in here and the story begins after A Court of Wings and Ruin. There is also a lot that is not canon, especially after the newer books. The story revolves around Rhysand, Azriel, and Rhysand's sister. I have rewritten this several times and tried to find all inaccuracies after I made corrections. I apologize if I missed something. If you let me know, I'll go back and fix it.
Relationships: Azriel (ACoTaR)/Original Female Character(s), Feyre Archeron/Rhysand
Comments: 3
Kudos: 60





	1. One Way Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An escape occurs.

The magic lifted. I couldn’t explain why or how but I suddenly felt myself again. There was an awareness of who I was. Suddenly, I knew I was in danger. Hidden beneath a glamour of magic, I was fine. Without that glamour, I was going to be in trouble. I ran to the back of the library, hiding behind the backmost row of books and looked for a reflective surface. The night creeping at the window made it reflective enough and I stared back at a face I hadn’t seen for 300 years. My own green eyes and black hair reflected back at me. Worse, my wings were obvious. 

“Lorra?”

The voice echoing through the room was the last person I wanted to see. He would turn me in without second thought. I did the only thing I knew how and begged for the shadows to hide me. It was harder than I would have thought but still possible. I felt myself surrounded by the darkness that I was praying for. The footsteps came closer and the face of Belsan came around the corner. I held my breath.

“I was sure she was here. Where in the Cauldron is she?”

His voice was angry. He turned and walked out and I waited until after the door closed, until after the candles had gone out on their own before I dared come out. In the time I spent waiting, I had time to think. Why had the glamour suddenly lifted? The only explanation I had was that the caster must have died. The longer the glamour was gone, the more I felt myself again. In my mind, I searched, trying to find the two people who could possibly help. 

“Help me, please.”

I waited, hoping for a reply but none came. I had no choice. I needed to get back to Prythian. The problem was, I didn’t really know where I was. If I was going to run, I needed to get my bearings. Quietly, I crept to the door, keeping the shadows close in the darkness. The hall was empty. Slowly, I traced the familiar path back to my room through the huge house. I listened before opening the door. Hopefully Belsan hadn’t come looking for me here. The room appeared empty. Still keeping my shadows, I crept in and looked around. The room was empty. Quickly, I found a cloak and a small satchel. I had no weapons, so I’d have to find one as I went. I pulled the cloak around me, tucking my wings in tightly. 

After deciding there was nothing else in the room that could help me, I left, quietly closing the door behind me. I crept along the wall, heading toward the kitchen. If I was right about the time, there would be nobody left. Darkness followed me and I moved as quickly as I dared to. In the kitchen, I looked for what little bits of food I might take with me. I found some bread and a few apples. There was some meat out on the board but I decided not to take it. Then I slipped out the kitchen door, keeping the shadows close. The ease with which I could wrap myself in darkness was calming me. At least I still had that protection. With my shadows and the knowledge I had learned so many years ago, I could do this. 

I spotted the guards and watched for several minutes, trying to decide what course to take. A horse would be the best option. No, flying would be the best option but I wasn’t sure that I could. It would have to be a horse. That meant making it to the stables. The guards had weapons though and I was going to need one, if I was going to get all the way back to Prythian and home. I considered my options. There was one guard, alone with his back to the wall here. If I could use the shadows, I might be able to get what I needed and get out without alerting anyone. Quietly, I crept closer, hoping that the guard would be confused at seeing an Illyrian here. 

“Good evening,” I purred seductively. 

Sure enough, the guard jumped, pulling his short sword. It was perfectly sized. 

“Who are you?”

“I’ve gotten a bit lost. I was hoping you could help me find my way.”

The guard looked me up and down, trying to determine if I was a threat. He must have decided I wasn’t because he let his sword drop. Good.

“Lost? You’re miles from where you’re from.”

“I know. Like I said, I got a little lost. Can you point me back toward Illyria?”

“East and north,” he replied quickly. “But maybe you’d like to spend the night with me instead.”

It was working. He was charmed by me. 

“That sounds lovely.” I stepped closer to him, lowering my voice, so he would lean in. 

The leer on his face was disgusting. I’m sure he had all sorts of ideas about what he wanted to do with me. He didn’t know who he was dealing with though. Rapidly, I forced the shadows around him, suffocating him. He didn’t make a sound, probably petrified. I grabbed the sword and ran for the stables, knowing that he would be confused for awhile. 

East and north was my direction. I would likely need passage on a ship but right now, I needed to get as far away as possible. I tried to remember which way the closest port was and decided to go directly east. I saddled the horse quickly and took off.


	2. Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel's dreams are keeping him from sleep and haunting his days.

I had thought coming back after the war would be hard. I was wrong. It was more than hard. I wanted to give in to my shadows and vanish. I wanted to be alone but I wanted to be around my friends. Especially Cass and Rhys. I felt the wind against my wings and wished not for the first time that I could just go away and not come back. My own personal misery.  
“I thought you went to bed.”

“Changed my mind. What do you want Mor?”

“I’m worried about you,” she whispered. “Maybe you and I can spend the night getting drunk and-”

“No.”

I felt her behind me and hoped that she would go away. The past few nights, Mor was the last person I wanted. 

I felt Rhys tug at the bond we shared, the question asked without words. - what’s wrong?

I sighed. I wish I knew. I wish I could tell him what I thought. Telling him though, would open up far more questions than I wanted to answer. I ignored him, as I had so many times before.

Mor was still behind me and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I stood up and bolted into the night sky, leaving them all behind for the rush of the wind and the cover of the shadows.

As soon as I landed, I felt him.

“Damn it Rhys! If you know where I go when I want to be alone, why don’t you leave me alone?”

“Because I’m worried. About you.”

“I’m fine. I just want to be left alone.”

“Az, there’s something bothering you. Is it Hybern?”

“No. War is war. It is what it is. We all came home safe and that’s all that matters.”

“Is it?”

I ignored his question, refusing to look at him. He watched me. 

“You and Cass are all I have.”

“You could have Mor. Or Elain.”

“I don’t want them. Also, Elain hates me or did you miss that fact?”

“She’ll change her mind after some time, I’m sure.”

“Look Rhys. I just need to be left alone. I need to think. I need to sleep.”  
“That’s the truth.”

Finally, I looked up at him.

“Well, I can hear you at night. You scream sometimes. Or you say things that make no sense.”

“Please Rhys.”

He shook his head, but at last he walked off and his presence left leaving me with my shadows and my thoughts.

The dreams were more than nightmares. They were slowly killing me inside.


	3. Safe Harbors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh tries to get through to her brother.

The sun was setting over the horizon and I decided I never wanted to take a voyage by water again. Slowly, I had been regaining my magical strength, practicing over and over. But I wanted to fly. Instead, I had glamoured my wings, hiding them and kept to myself. Especially when the sun was down.

I laid down on the lumpy mattress I had secured for myself and closed my eyes. Now that it was dark, I could try again.Focusing every ounce of power, I dug for the long buried bonds. Each night, they came easier and faster. The problem was I still hadn’t gotten any replied back. Shuddering at the thought of what that could mean, I pushed the emotion back down and concentrated. I could see the marks in my mind and focused on them. Then, very slowly, I reached out.

I felt along the invisible tether, trying to trace them back to the minds that they joined me to. Both seemed intact, which made me think they were still alive. Maybe they didn’t know it was me? Maybe I was doing this wrong? It had been awhile. I decided to pick one. That might work better.

Focusing on my brother, I took a deep steadying breath and let my mind be open. Pulling along the invisible connection, I tried to call out to him. 

“Rhys?”

There as nothing. And then suddenly, I felt a tug, as if the person on the other side had suddenly heard me. 

“Rhysand?”

Suddenly, I got a wave of sorrow through the bond. 

“I’m so sorry Myrrh.”  
“For what?”

“I didn’t protect you. I should have saved you.”

“Rhys, what are you talking about? I’m alive. I’m here. I’m coming home.”

Next thing I knew, I was lost in a memory. 

The wind blew across the landscape and Rhys stood completely still with his eyes closed. His black hair blew across his face and he took a deep breath. He looked as though he were listening for something.  
“Aha!” He took off at a run for a small group of trees and then flew upwards, his black wings stretching out behind him.  
“Gotcha!”  
I frowned. “No fair Rhys! I felt you looking in my head.”  
“Then get a better shield,” he said haughtily.  
I stuck my tongue out at him before jumping off the branch I was perched on, letting my wings glide me to the ground. Rhys followed me down.  
If he hadn’t been taller than me, we’d have been mistaken for twins. The only difference between us besides our height were our eyes, mine a bright green while his were a deep violet color.  
“Come on, we’re going to be late for dinner and you know how Father is,” said Rhys lightly.  
We began to walk back towards a cabin that sat alone on the side of the mountain. The sun had started setting and cast long shadows onto the ground. Rhys stopped as he watched a shadow loom in front of him. He stepped sideways to protect me before I giggled.  
“Myrrh! Knock it off!”  
“What’s wrong Rhys? Are you scared of the shadows?”  
He punched me in the arm.  
“Ow,” she muttered. I punched him back.  
“Didn’t hurt,” he taunted.  
I ignored him and went back to playing with the shadow in front of me. I bent it to my will, letting it slide along the ground to my feet and wrapping it upwards until I nearly vanished in it.  
“Are you sure you’re a daemati?” Rhys asked.  
I shrugged. “I don’t like playing with people’s heads. I don’t like what people are thinking most of the time. The shadows are more interesting.”  
“Huh. Maybe you’re a shadowsinger,” he said thoughtfully.  
“Doesn’t matter to me anyway,” I said sadly.  
“You know you can’t go. Girls aren’t allowed.”  
“That’s a dumb rule. I can fly as well as you can and I’m just as strong as you.”  
He raised his eyebrows at me.  
“Close enough,” I muttered.  
“You know Father wouldn’t let you even if you could go.”  
I frowned.  
“And remember what Mother said,” Rhys continued. “Girls are powerful in their own way.”  
I stuck my tongue out at him again before turning away from him to look at the sunset.  
He slipped inside her head, letting comfort flood in. He really would miss having her around. She was the only person who really understood him.  
“I’m going to be all by myself, Rhys. What am I going to do?”  
He pulled me into his arms and sighed.  
“You’ll have to make some more friends,” he told her simply.  
“Nobody else understands though.”  
“I know,” he sighed and hugged me tighter.

More sorrow swept down the bond but I couldn’t get any closer. I wanted to reach out to him but something was keeping him from reaching out to me.

“I’m here. I’m coming. I’m here. I’m coming.” 

It was all I could think to send to him.


	4. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys' dreams confuse him.

The shouting was unnerving. I knew the voice so well and she sounded like she needed my help. I kept looking through the darkness separating us but I couldn't find her. 

“Just tell me where you are”, I screamed out into the dark.

The reply was so muddled I couldn't make it out. Another voice was calling my name.

“Rhys, wake up!”

I started awake, covered in a cold sweat to see my mate looking at me with concern. I shook the sleep out of my head.

“Are you ok?” Feyre asked.

I nodded. The dreams were getting to be too much. I looked out the window and realized it was almost dawn. I needed to talk to my brothers. I dragged myself out of bed. Feyre watched me carefully. I could feel the concern down our bond and I gave her a smile.

“I'm ok. I just need to figure out where this dream is coming from. Maybe Cass will have an idea,” I told her.

She watched me but didn't say anything else. She knew I'd likely just brush off her concerns anyway. But what I said was the truth. I needed to see if Cass had any ideas. Or perhaps Az. Dreaming about my sister when she had been dead for centuries had to mean something. I sent messages to both of my brothers to come to meet me for breakfast so we could talk. 

Az and Cass were both there within an hour. Az looked as though he hadn’t slept all night.

They were both concerned, however. It was rare for me to want to see them this early. So I explained the dreams to both of them. How it had been happening for nearly two months. It was always the same. Myrrh, looking for me, asking me to find her. My little sister had been one of my favorite people in this world and losing her had nearly destroyed me. 

The anger prompted me to seek revenge on Tamlin and his family. It took a lot to come back from that and I was a little afraid that I might be caught in some trap set by Hybern or one of his successors. When I finished the whole explanation, Cass was frowning. He was looking at Az with a great deal of concern. 

When I looked at Az, I could see why. He had gone pale and was sitting in the chair with a look of shock on his face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked him. 

Az shook his head but didn’t answer me. I looked back at Cass.

“What do you think?”

“I don’t know what to think, honestly. Could it just be because of the war? Maybe it’s bringing up old hurt?”

I said nothing. My attention was on Azriel, who still looked pale and exhausted. It was worse than that though because there were tears in his eyes. Cass followed my gaze and stared.

Azriel sat staring at his arm, focused on something that I couldn’t see. I poked at his mind a little, hoping to get an idea of what was wrong. 

“Get out!” 

I jumped. He had actually shouted the words out loud at me. The look on his face was anger. 

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to pry.”

“Yes you were,” he snapped back. 

“Ok, yes. But I’m worried about you. Last night you act as if you never want to see any of us again. Now this morning, you’re snapping at me for trying to see what’s wrong and completely ignoring my concerns. Something big is bothering you.”

“Az,” Cass said quietly, “what’s going on with you?”


	5. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel admits to a secret and Rhys learns something surprising.

Looking up at my brothers hurt a little. Rhys and Cass thought they knew everything about me but I had kept a very large secret from them for a very long time now. I looked down at the table for a moment, trying to gather my thoughts, think about how to say this. 

“I‘ve had the same dreams,” I said, looking Rhys in the eyes.

“What?” Rhys asked.

“How?” asked Cassian. He looked so confused and it hurt me. He was realizing that there was something I wasn’t telling them.

“How could you be having those dreams? Maybe it is a trap.” Rhys was talking quickly, trying to find a way to make this work in his mind.

“Then why wouldn’t I have the same dream?” asked Cass.

Rhys shook his head. “It’s like being in her mind.”

“So, you can see in her mind?”

“No, she’s getting into mine,” Rhys replied. “But, we have a bond, so that makes sense. She could get into my head that way, although it would be hard for her.”

Rhys turned around and stared at me. I dropped my head back down, trying to think of what to say.

I heard the question in my head - “What are you not telling me?”

I looked up at Rhys before answering him. I was going to look him in the eyes when I said it.

“She’s my mate.”

It took Rhys several moments to process what I said. I silently braced myself for what was coming. It still took me by surprise when he hit me. Cass jumped out of his seat and grabbed Rhys before he could do anything else. I backed up a few steps to put some more space between us. My jaw hurt but I felt worse that he reacted exactly as I thought he would. I had hoped that with time, he'd be less volatile about the idea. Apparently, he was still a very protective brother. I rubbed my jaw for a moment and said nothing. Cass broke the silence.

“You’re her mate?”

“Yes.”

“No,” snarled Rhys.

I looked back up at him. “Yes.” I turned my wrist over. There on the inside, almost hidden by other marks was the small infinity mark. I had worn it for centuries now.

Rhys stared at it. 

“I could get inside your mind and make you prove it,” he growled.

“You could,” I admitted. “Do you really not believe me?”

For a moment, I thought he might go digging through my mind, looking for proof. I shuddered at what he could find in there. 

“Rhys, do you really want to see that?” asked Cass slowly.

That seemed to bring him back to the present and he turned and looked at Cass who had a serious look on his face. 

“That is my sister,” he finally said slowly.

“Think about what he just said,” Cass said.

“I am”, growled Rhys.

“No”, said Cass abruptly. “Think about what he just said. How long has it been? Three centuries?”

Cass’s words seemed to have an impact. Rhys took a step back and looked at me.

“I’m sorry”, he said.

“It's a bruise”, I replied. “I've had worse.”

Rhys shook his head. “That's not what I meant. I can’t imagine losing Feyre and you've been… well, I'm sorry.”

I just looked down at the floor. The emptiness had been something I had just lived with. I couldn't change it so I had just kept going every day. After awhile it didn't seem so empty if I didn't think about it. So I hadn't. I had kept watch over my friends and family. I protected them with everything I was worth.  
Since Cass was the only one of us thinking reasonably, he came up with the revelation that neither Rhys nor I had.  
“If you're both having the same dream, is it possible that it's not a dream? Could Myrrh be trying to talk to one or both of you to try and get help?”  
Rhys paused and thought about that.  
“Why can't I get through to her though?” he asked.  
I shook my head. “I don't know if I'm getting through to her either.” 

Rhys turned to Cass. “Find everyone. We’re going to solve this now.”


	6. Straight on til Nightfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh finds her way to Summer Courts borders.

I was never a fan of the bright sunlight. I liked to be able to hide and it was nearly impossible in the bright light. Midday or not though, I was getting off the damn ship. Looking off the side of the ship I realized that we were coming into Summer Court. 

“My damn luck,” I muttered, pulling my cloak more closely around myself. I had been using a glamour, the same one that I had in Hybern so that nobody would recognize me. I didn’t think that the Autumn Court would want to hear about my being around anywhere, given how that relationship ended. 

I walked off the ship and headed to the north. It was possible that I could winnow but I had never been good at it and it was far. Going north would take me through Winter, Dawn, and Day Courts to get to Night. Getting to Velaris would take forever walking. There was nothing to do but to try and fly. I headed out toward the woods , knowing that I was going in the wrong direction but also knowing I needed a secluded place to try and practice taking flight again. By the time the sun was setting, I had reached the edge of the woods and was ready to rest for the night. Tomorrow would be as good a time as any to practice flying. 

I climbed a tree, looking for a good sturdy branch to spend the night on. When I was content with my spot, I pulled my cloak around myself and let my eyes close. I had hoped for days that once I was back in Prythian that I would have more luck with communicating with Az or Rhys.

I felt safer in the tree or maybe it was just being back in a world that was mine. I took a deep breath and focused everything inside me. I considered for a moment who to reach out to. Tonight, it needed to be Azriel. My mate. My love. I found the connection in my mind, imagining it as a rope tying us together. Like I had been doing with my brother, I followed the rope, pulling on it, hoping that if I pulled enough, I would get his attention. I was wanting to just get close enough for him to know I was here. I took a deep breath in and called out into the darkness.

I nearly fell out of the tree when I felt his reply rush back at me.

“Where are you?”

I could hardly breathe, hearing him so clearly after so long. 

“I’m here.”

“Where is here?”

“Summer Court.”

I tried to let him into my mind to see. I should have realized that Az didn’t have that kind of power. Not without some help anyway. My brother’s presence in the bond was suddenly overwhelming. 

“Rhys?”

“Yup. We thought we could maybe amplify what we were doing and see if it helped. I guess it did.”

I could hardly feel Azriel through the power that Rhys had. Rhys and Az had their own bond, so they were likely using that to strengthen their ability to get inside my head.

“Oh, gross,” I heard Rhys through the bond.

“Sorry,” mumbled Az. It was only then that I felt what Az had been trying to slip through the bond. That overwhelming feeling of love that only mates could share. The desire he felt was slipping through too and probably what had caused Rhys’ reaction.

“Ugh,” I heard Rhys. “You need a stronger shield little sister.”

I ignored him and let the feeling pass through anyway. It had been 300 years since I had seen Azriel and I missed him.

“Do me a favor, Myrrh. Stay where you are. We’re going to come to you.”

I nodded. 

“Tomorrow. Make your way up to Autumn Court and wait at the border.”

“Are you sure Rhys?”

“Yup. Trust me.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassian and Lucien are taken with Rhys to try and meet up with Myrrh.

I sent messages to the entire court, explaining that Rhys had something important to tell them all. I set the date and time and made it clear that they needed to be present. As close as I was to Rhys, I still didn't know what he had planned and it made me nervous. Azriel even asked me if I knew what Rhys was thinking and all I could do was shake my head. Sometimes Rhys could be frustrating like that. 

Nothing could have prepared me for the words “my mate” coming from Az’s mouth. They had, however, and he had the bruise to prove it, looking even worse, three days later. Fortunately nobody asked why Az had the bruise as the members of Rhys’ inner circle started to arrive. Everyone kept looking at me, as if I could explain why they had been called here. Unfortunately, I may have been the commander of the Night Court's armies but I was not always privy to the innermost mind of the High Lord of the Night Court.

Rhys stood up and looked around the room at the people he considered to be his family. Lucien sat off in a corner, next to Azriel who was whispering something to him. I saw Lucien’s face change and he abruptly looked up at Rhys.

“Is it true?” Lucien asked.

“Yes.” Rhys’ answer was short. The rest of the room stared at him, waiting.

“My sister is alive. She is currently heading towards Autumn Court, waiting for us.”

Lucien’s face was an odd color of grey, as if he was suddenly very afraid of what might be coming next. Rhys glanced at him and Az leaned over and whispered something again. Lucien shook his head in silent answer and I wondered what they were talking about. I hadn’t know the two were close.

“I need for most of you to stay here because I am still wary that something is amiss. I am going to take a small group out to find Myrrh.”

He glanced at me and I nodded. We had already talked about this. Rhys, Lucien, and I were going to Autumn to try and find her. Azriel was staying here. He wasn’t happy about that decision but Rhys had talked to him privately and whatever he said convinced the shadowsinger that he needed to stay here.

Rhys and Lucien winnowed to a spot they had predetermined, taking me with them. Once we were on the ground, we looked around to see exactly where we were.

“This is almost as close to the border as you can get,” muttered Lucien as he looked around.

Rhys nodded. “You two go north, I’ll go south.”

We started walking, making as much noise as we could. This was all part of Rhys’ plan. Soon enough, Autumn Court guards found us. Seeing Lucien, they stepped back a little. 

“I am still allowed to walk on these lands, am I not?” Lucien asked coldly.

The guards glanced up at me.

“He’s with me,” snapped Lucien. “Go.” 

The guards disappeared but Lucien looked back towards me and shook his head. He didn’t like what just happened. 

I relayed what happened to Rhys who urged me to keep looking. I recognized his anxiety. We needed to find her before they did. And it was at that moment that I saw the cloaked figure. Lucien and I both stopped and I drew my sword. 

“Really Cassian?”

I stopped my advance at the voice. In an instant, I alerted Rhys.

I could feel Rhys answering my silent alarm through our bond.

The figure’s hand slowly reached up to the hood and pulled it back, without saying a word.  
Lucien and I gasped at the same time. Staring back at us, looking incredibly relieved was a woman who could have been Rhys’ twin except for the fact that she had green eyes. 

I heard Rhys land next to me. He didn’t say anything and neither did the woman but clearly some communication passed through their bond because a moment later Rhys let out a roar of joy and swept her up into a hug and I could swear he was crying.


	8. Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys brings his sister back to Velaris.

Nothing could have prepared me for seeing my sister standing in front of me alive. When I landed next to Cass, I could feel her relief. She hadn’t wanted to try and explain this to Cass. One thought through our bond - What the hell took you so long?  
I laughed as I grabbed her. I couldn’t believe it but holding her helped make it more real. When I stepped back, I realized that she was crying. 

Cass looked at me with concern.  
“Are you sure that’s really her?” he asked me.  
“I’m sure,” I replied. “We share a bond and that bond couldn’t have been duplicated.”  
Lucien walked up to her with a smile. She met him part way with a hug.  
“Lucien, I’ve missed you,” she said.  
Lucien merely nodded. He looked a little shocked. I tried to think back to the various fae that she knew. Lucien had been one of the few that she was close too. In fact, I had often wondered if they were in a relationship. 

“Come on,” said Lucien. “We need to get out of here.”

I nodded and took my sister’s hand. In an instant we were gone.

The evening sky of night court was full of stars and I heard the gasp from Myrrh.

“It’s what we always talked about as kids,” I said quietly.

The memory flooded my mind.  
“Three weeks,” came my father’s gruff voice.  
“It may take me longer,” began my mother but she was cut off abruptly.  
“I SAID THREE,” and we both jumped as our father roared at our mother.   
Our mother glared at him. It could never be said that she didn’t stand up to him. Their relationship was like fire and ice though, light and darkness, causing angry fights and two people who never seemed to agree on anything. But the two were mates and bonded to one another. What may have once been a loving relationship had seen its trials through the years and now there was little love. The two were too different. But they were drawn to one another through what we thought was a sick twist of fate.  
I glanced at my mother and she nodded, telling me to go outside. Clearly this conversation wasn’t done and she wanted Myrrh out of the cabin for it.  
“Come on,” I whispered.  
She slipped off the bench and followed me outside, wandering away from the cabin.  
“How did they ever manage to have us?” wondered Myrrh aloud.  
“Cauldron knows,” I replied.  
In truth, I had often wondered how my parents had managed to have two children so close in age and then have that relationship vanish. I also often wondered if me and Myrrh weren’t part of that reason.  
I watched my sister sit down on the ground and seemingly pluck a shadow off the ground to play with. I smiled at her and then let my gaze drift upwards to the stars.  
“Someday, we’re going to live in a beautiful place,” I whispered to the stars. “No fighting, no anger.”  
Myrrh glanced up at me and smiled.  
“And if I ever meet a shadowsinger, I’ll let you know if that’s what you are.”  
She giggled at me. “Sure Rhys. If you ever meet one, let me know.”  
“Hey! You never know. I’ll be powerful and in control of a great army some day and I’ll meet all kinds of people. I’m sure I’ll meet one somewhere along the way.”  
“Right. Like you’re going to meet another daemati.”  
“Well, ok, hopefully not but shadowsingers aren’t as rare.”  
I sat down next to her, wrapping an arm around her and rumpling her hair.  
“Hey!” she said, brushing my hand away.  
“You know I’ll always be here for you right? No matter how far away I have to go. I’ll always protect you.”   
She smiled at me. “I know.”

I was brought back to reality by the silence. Myrrh was looking at the house and I got the feeling that she knew Azriel was there. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked her out loud. 

She was silent. 

“Myrrh?”

“Rhys, what if he’s moved on?”

I stared at her for a few moments, trying to understand her thought process. 

“Azriel? Move on?”

“Yes.”

“Are you kidding me? You’re mates.”

“Since when did that ever matter? Do you not remember our parents?”

“I do. Azriel isn’t our father though. He’s,” I paused trying to explain what I had been thinking about since Az had told me about them. “I guess I never noticed the differences. Az is good at hiding things and I just figured that he was moody. I mean, he had a tough time when he was younger.”

“I know. That’s why I wondered if he didn’t just move on. Maybe he doesn’t feel the same things because of all that.”

“Maybe you need to go talk to him,” I finally said. 

She pulled herself up to look more regal, like she had been taught. “I imagine there’s quite a few people in there right now.”

“You’d be right,” replied Cass.


	9. Dead or Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh learns some things unexpectedly and so does everyone else.

Being raised as part Illyrian and part High Fae, I was taught to always command a room. I also knew that in the time I was gone my brother must have taken control of the throne. He didn’t say he was High Lord but I could tell in the way Lucien and Cass were with him that Rhys was in charge here.

“Let’s go,” I said quickly.

I felt Rhys trying to soothe me through our bond. Making that promise to Rhys, to be faithful to him, had meant a lot to him at the time and I was hopeful that he remembered that moment. I tried to reflect those feeling back down the bond. I pushed open the door and felt Cassian right behind me. I remembered Cass well. I met him at the camp where the three trained together and had seen Cass with Rhys many times. Cassian had Rhys’ back. Right now, he didn’t trust me at all. I couldn’t blame him.

I walked into the room and Cassian ushered me to the right, into a large room that looked like a library. There were a lot more people in the room than I bargained for. My eyes fell first on my cousin, Morrigan. Our eyes met briefly and she said nothing. Her eyes went straight to Rhys behind me. There were several people in the room I didn’t recognize at all. And then my eyes fell on Az. His hazel eyes met mine and I suddenly felt like we were the only two people in the room. I had forgotten the power the bond had over us.

I didn’t move from where I stood. Instead, in silence I reached out over our bond. The shadows that always surrounded him pushed outward and then drew back in, as if for a moment, he had lost control. And then I felt that rush of love. Even from this distance, I could see that his breathing had quickened. He didn’t move though.   
Neither did Cass. He stood next to me waiting to see what Rhys would do next.

“I’m sure you all remember my sister. Well, most of you.”

He glanced over at another High Fae. I didn’t recognize her at all. 

“Feyre, meet Myrrh. Myrrh, Feyre is my wife.”

Feyre had blue eyes and brown hair but she was easily one of the most beautiful women here. Of course he found a gorgeous woman to be his wife. I gave a small head nod.

“You’ll forgive me. I don’t remember you.”

“No,” she said easily, “You wouldn’t.”

I’ll explain later came the whisper through our bond. I nodded and smiled. 

Morrigan stared at me. “You were supposed to be dead.”

I turned and looked at Az, who gave a slight nod of his head.

“Dead? Why would I be dead?”

“Well,” Cass said slowly, “we’re hoping you can explain that to us.”

“I was kidnapped, not killed.” I watched Azriel who was staring at the floor but his shadows were dancing around. They were watching for him - he was anxious. 

I had pulled all of my shadows in tight. Few people knew that I was a shadowsinger. In fact, there were only two people and they were both in the room. I didn’t want anyone to have suspicions that I was spying for anyone else. 

“Who said I was dead?” I turned and looked at Rhys.

He took a deep, even breath. “Tamlin.”

My jaw fell to the floor. 

“Do you have wings?” asked Cass.

I spun from my brother to Cassian and stared at him. “What kind of a question is that, exactly?”

“Well, Tamlin’s father had wings. Supposedly yours and your mother’s.”

Rhys suddenly stepped between me and everyone else in the room. He had recognized moments quicker what was about to happen. The room was suddenly engulfed in darkness as the truth of what Cassian said to me hit me. If Tamlin’s father had my mother’s wings then that meant - 

“I’m sorry Myrrh. I didn’t even realize that you didn’t know.” My brother wrapped me in his arms and then his wings, gently bringing me to the floor. I sobbed into his arms unable to comprehend that my mother was dead. Somehow, Azriel ended up beside us. Of course he did. 

“Let me take her Rhys.”

Rhys nodded, helping me into his arms. Azriel carefully brought me out of the room, up a flight of stairs. I had no idea where he took me but I sat with him and sobbed and he helped me contain the shadows. He sat there with me, controlling the rage and sorrow from spreading and all I could hear was his voice in my ear.

“I’m so sorry. I’m here.”


	10. Desperate Measures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhysand considers how to find out what happened to his sister.

The room was in chaos when I walked back in.

“Silence!”

The voices stopped as all of the people in the room looked at me. I turned and stared at Cassian with fury in my eyes. 

“That was the most despicable tactic I have ever seen you use,” I whispered with anger. “If you ever treat my sister like that again, I will personally take your wings off.”

“Try it,” Cass muttered at me.

My anger flared outward and I slammed Cass into the wall, crawling inside his mind as I went. 

“You doubt me?”

Cass looked genuinely frightened. Feyre was at my side.

“Rhys. Rhysand.”

I turned and looked at her, feeling the power emanate from her. She couldn’t match my power but she had other ways of soothing me. I took several deep breaths before I stepped back and released Cassian.

“I’m sorry. Rhys, I needed to know and that was the only thing I could think of,” came Cassian’s quiet reply.

“Well great, you nearly got me killed,” muttered Mor. “We could have all suffocated in that… whatever that was. What was that, Rhys?”

I sighed, hoping that Azriel was managing to tame the shadows that had been let out of control.

“That is what would happen when a shadowsinger loses control of their power.”

“Azriel did that?” asked Mor, staring at me.

“No,” I said quietly.

“Rhys, I thought she was like you. Daemati.” Mor stared at me.

I shook my head. “No. She never could do that. For a long time we thought she had no powers. And then one day, I realized that she played with shadows. It wasn’t until I met Azriel that I realized the extent of her power.”

“So she has more power than him?” asked Cass in amazement.

“They’re probably the only two who could tell you. They’re pretty evenly matched.” I glanced at the doorway and didn’t see advancing shadows so I felt that Az may have gotten things somewhat under control. I wanted to know how she was doing but also didn’t want to disturb them. 

“There was no need to test that Cass. I know her and I know her loyalties.”

“Do you though?” asked Mor.

“Yes, I do. She and I, we have a bond of sorts. Kind of like Cass and Az. She swore loyalty to me. I would never question that loyalty. If she was taken, it had to be by someone with a lot of power.”

“With the shadowsinger powers?” questioned Cass.

“Hence, someone with a lot of power. It could have been Amarantha. I need to speak with her.” 

“I should be there, Rhys.”

“No. Az will be there. I told you Cass, I trust her with my life.”

Cass shook his head as I climbed the stairs. I needed to know what happened that night.


	11. Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel gets a short version of what happened the night Myrrh vanished and Rhys gets a short version of their love affair.

After several moments, I stopped holding onto her shadows so tightly and saw that she was containing them more. I carefully released my control and let her take them over, noting that they were still surrounding her in an angry cloud. At least they were contained. I held her in my arms as she cried.

The knock on the door startled both of us. Rhys opened the door slowly.

“Can I come in?”

“It’s safe,” I told him.

“Well, that’s a good thing. For a moment I thought we might all be consumed by shadows.”

I looked at Rhys, trying to tell him with my face that it was a close thing. He seemed to get it. He sat down on the floor next to Myrrh’s feet.

“Can I ask you to tell me what happened that night?”

I watched my love close her eyes and take a deep breath before looking back at her brother. She seemed to be gathering all of her strength because after a moment she looked at me.

“Az, I may need help.” I searched for the edges of her shadows and wrapped them up with mine, giving her the control she was asking for.

“We were going to camp to see you but I wanted to try and see Az too. I fell back from the travel group on purpose and headed toward where I was supposed to meet Azriel but…”

“I got held up at Court. I was asked to do several things before leaving and I didn’t get there until well after…” I paused, not wanting to tell her what I had found when I arrived with Rhys. 

Rhys nodded. “How long had you been secretly meeting each other?”

I looked at Rhys and then looked at Myrrh. I didn’t want to tell him if she didn’t want him to know. She nodded at me.

“By then? Decades.”

Rhys’ jaw fell as he stared at me. “When did it start, exactly?”

“Starfall after the Blood Rites,” she told him quietly. I nodded in agreement.

“After our blood rites?” he asked hesitantly.

I nodded. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

I absently rubbed my still bruised jaw. “I thought it was prudent to keep it a secret.”

Rhysand nodded, understanding why I had been so hesitant to tell him.

“I still remember the warning you gave Cass the very first time I met him,” Myrrh murmured.

“Met us both,” I corrected her.

She shook her head at me. “No, Az. I met you before that.”

I tried to think back but came up empty. 

“The first time I visited Rhys at the camp. I was with my mother and I noticed you across the camp. You were alone. You looked at me with Rhys and you seemed angry. I felt something though.”

I closed my eyes and tried to recall the moment. It had to be before Rhys had befriended me. Suddenly, it came back. The girl who looked like Rhys in a yellow dress. I sighed.

Rhys stared out the window. The sun had completely set, leaving the darkness outside. He turned to look at me before standing up.

“Azriel, I’m leaving you to find a bed for my sister to sleep in. We’ll figure out everything else in the morning.”

“A bed?” I asked hesitantly.

“I assume that you have a bed she can sleep in tonight.” Rhys winked at me and slipped out of the room.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh begins to explain to Azriel how strange it is to be in Velaris.

I kept my eyes closed for a moment letting myself feel, smell and hear everything around me. I had dreamed of coming home for so long that I could hardly believe I was really here. Trapped in Hybern’s world, I had simply started to give up. It wasn’t until the spell broke that I even realized I could escape. Then I came to find out that my mother was dead, killed by Tamlin’s family. Tamlin, that my father had wanted me to marry.

I sat on the couch next to Azriel, feeling his arms around me. His breathing was even and slow but he had the same scent he always had. 

“We should get you to bed,” he whispered.

“Where?” 

“You can sleep in my bed, if you want to.” Taking my hand he stood up, pulling me with him. I followed him down the hallway. Most of the doors were closed and I assumed that they belonged to some of the people who had been downstairs before.

“I lost control downstairs, didn’t I?”

“You did. It’s ok though. You weren’t expecting that.”

I frowned. I had given away my secret in front of all those people. It had been a secret I guarded closely and now so many people knew.

“Hey, it’s fine,” whispered Az, as he stopped outside of the last door. “They know I am and nobody cares.” He let his thumb brush across my cheek, brushing away some tears. I hadn’t realized that I was crying.

He pushed open the door.

Inside was almost nothing. The bed was neatly made but the rest of the room was stark. There was a desk and a chair but it looked like it had never been used. He hadn’t decorated. There was a door that led to a closet and it was also neat. All his clothes hung up nicely. 

“Do you stay here a lot?” I asked.

He nodded. He pulled a shirt out of the closet. “You can sleep in this, if you want.”

I took the shirt from him and smiled. He stepped closer, wrapping his arms around me again. I buried my face into his neck, snuggling close to him. 

“I’ll be downstairs if you need me,” he whispered.

“Wait,” I said as he stepped back. “Aren’t you staying?”

He looked back at me shyly. “I wasn’t sure that you’d want me to stay. Is that what you want?”

“Yes, of course. Don’t you want to stay with me?”

“More than anything,” he whispered. I shivered at the desire in his voice. It had been a long time since we had been together.

“So, you haven’t found someone else to keep your bed warm?” I asked hesitantly. “Mor looked a little possessive.”

He blushed and I realized that Mor probably had good reason to be possessive. I stepped away from him.

“Azriel, do you want to go to her? I don’t want to keep you here if you’re in love with someone else.”

“I don’t love her. I have taken her to bed before but I’ve never loved anyone else.”

I turned and sat down on the bed, trying to decide if I believed him. I stared at the floor, acutely aware of his eyes on me.

“Myrrh.” He got down on his knees in front of me and pulled my wrist to him. He traced his finger on the infinity symbol on my wrist. “I meant it, when I promised to love you until we die.” He kissed my wrist gently. “I would go make the same promise again, right now.”

“This is so strange to me. In my mind, it’s a few months after I left. I’m the same person I was that day. But you’ve been living your life. You’ve changed. All of you have. I don’t know what to think or say.”


	13. A Matter of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel tries to fix things but they go a bit sideways.

I sighed. She wasn’t wrong. The woman in front of me had memories from the last three hundred years but if she had been glamoured then none of them were hers. She was as good as trapped in that other world. Meanwhile, I had kept going, living my life. I had been to war. Been a spy for Rhys. She had none of those experiences and I had no way to explain them to her.

I knelt in front of her, wondering what to do next. Maybe she was right and I had moved on. The desire of the bond was still there though. Could we even make this work again? 

The knock on the door startled me.

Leaving Myrrh on the bed, I walked over and opened the door.

“Feyre?” 

“Evening Az. Do you have a moment to talk?”

“Sure. Is something wrong?”

She shook her head. “Not with me. But Rhys said there might be a problem with you.”

I stared at her. The fact that Rhys could read me and likely his sister so well was not surprising to me. How Feyre could help, I had no idea. It seemed like that was what she was offering though.

“Myrrh?”

She looked up at Feyre. There was obvious pain on her face and it nearly killed me inside.

“Maybe I can help you,” began Feyre slowly. “I’m sure that you don’t want Rhys in your head and Cauldron knows he probably doesn’t want to be there either. But I don’t know you at all. I might be able to let you see what you’ve missed.”

“How?” Myrrh asked her suspiciously.

“Well, it’s a bit of a long story but I have the same powers as your brother. Perhaps I can use that to help you. Connect you and Azriel so that you can see what’s happened in all this time. If you’re both ok with that?”

Feyre sounded hesitant and I could guess why. This was a big ask that she was making. It would mean that I would have to let her inside my mind, which was something that I hadn’t previously allowed. 

“Would that work?” Myrrh asked, looking up at me.

I shrugged.

“Are you ok letting me into your head?” Feyre asked her again.

Myrrh stared back at Feyre and for a moment, I saw the fire that I used to see in her when she was younger. It was a mixture of defiance and pride.

“I have nothing to hide from you or anyone else.”

Feyre sat down on the bed next to Myrrh. “Can I hold your hand?” Feyre asked.

Myrrh nodded and Feyre reached down and took her hand. I had no idea what was happening but Feyre frowned a few times. Finally though, I felt Feyre reach out into my mind. I tried to relax but it wasn’t easy for me to let her in. Feyre was good though. After a few moments of soothing feelings, I let my guard down some and she managed to make a connection with me. I could hear Feyre whisper in my head.

“Are you ready?”

I nodded, which was silly because she couldn’t see me. She must have felt my approval though because after a moment, I was flooded with thoughts and they weren’t mine or Feyre’s. They belonged to Myrrh. I gasped.

I was seeing myself though Myrrh’s eyes. I looked at her and grinned, “So, about those shadows?” 

It was disconcerting to hear my own words and know that this was how she saw me.  
I glanced at myself and found a shadow of a nearby tree. I could feel the shadows of a nearby tree and pulled on them, reminding myself that I wasn’t doing this and it was all in Myrrh’s memory. She played with the darkness for a moment and then let it go.  
“Huh,” I heard myself say. “I’ve never met anyone else who could do that.”  
I felt her surprise and confusion. “You can change shadows like that?”  
I nodded, and let the shadows around me expand a little. Myrrh gasped.  
“That’s neat. I can’t do that.”  
“You probably can,” I told her. “You just need to practice.”  
“I’ll have to work on that.”  
She locked eyes with me and she felt that strange sensation of being drawn to me, the same feeling I had felt. She reached out her hand, almost without thinking about it and touched mine. I remembered the surprise I had felt when she did that. Just as suddenly she dropped my hand and I felt her worry. I watched the memory through her eyes and it was amazing to me. 

I watched all the images that played through her mind. I wondered if she was seeing my own memories the same way. 

I felt Feyre nudge me, as if saying “Let her in.”

I took a deep breath and tried to relax. It was just me and Myrrh. Almost without warning, I felt myself remembering things. The horrors of Under the Mountain, seeing Keir and Amarantha together. The horror that she put Rhys through. The war. The worry. Being scared. Being alone. Finding comfort in…

“No,” I abruptly pulled back, not wanting her to see that.

I came back to reality as Feyre was suddenly gone and Myrrh slammed the door behind her as she took off. Instinctively, I turned and chased her down the stairs. She had a good head start though and I heard the front door closing as I hit the top of the staircase.

This called for reinforcements. In a moment, Nuala was off, knowing instinctively what I needed her to do. I stopped where I was and sat down on the step, head in my hands. Not for the first time, I felt myself wanting to cry.

“Are you going to find her?” came Feyre’s questions from behind me.

“Nuala will,” I answered her. “Faster than I could.”


	14. Hiding in Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh shows some of her stubborn personality.

Azriel shoved me out of his head fast but not before I got glimpses of what was there. Morrigan. He hadn’t wanted me to see, to know what he felt in that moment. I could only find one explanation for that and I didn’t want to wait for him to lie to me and tell me she meant nothing to him. I needed to get out of the house.

I had no idea how far I had run when I finally stopped. The mountains loomed in front of me and there was little tree cover here. In fact, I came to a stop in a large open area that could have been any number of things. Glancing around, I saw an abandoned building and made my way to it so I’d be more hidden. I didn’t want to be out in the open.

I pulled my cloak around me, sitting down at the base of a tree. The shadows would hide me well here. I pulled myself into the darkness, letting it swallow me, knowing that nobody could see me from the outside. I sat that way for a long time until I realized that I wasn’t alone.

Turning, I stared into the face of… someone or something. I couldn’t tell if she was real or shadow.

“My master has asked me to look for you.”

“Who is that?” I asked hesitantly. 

“Azriel.” 

“Why? So he can lie to me? I won’t listen to lies. I watched enough horrible things with my parents.”

“So this has to be the same? Can it not be different?”

“I will not be played with by a male for the sake of a lover!” I shouted at her.

“You make too many assumptions,” she hissed before slinking off into the darkness.

I laid on the ground, letting tears fall and wishing that I could leave the world entirely. I could still feel the pull of the bond I shared with him. A few weeks ago, it gave me hope. Now I wished I could sever it and never feel it again.

“Are you safe?” The question popped into my mind and I knew it could only be one person.

“Yes, Rhys. Now leave me be.”

“Hah! As if, little sister.”

“I made a mistake. I’ll leave.”

“No!”

I startled with the force of his emphasis. He’d have yelled if he was present. As it was, it echoed through my mind.

“I have obviously come back to something that I didn’t need to be a part of. I don’t want to cause you trouble.”

“I am the only one allowed to make that decision. You're not trouble. You are my sister and as much a part of this court as anyone.”

“Then I’ll spy for you. Something. Anything.” I must have sounded desperate because Rhys was silent.

Finally I got the tiniest of whispers back from him. “As long as you are safe. I’ll find you tomorrow. But little sister, I think you are mistaken about him.”

That was the second time since I left that someone had told me that. First the shadow girl, then my brother. But I knew what I had seen in his mind, and I could feel the emotion. He had wanted her. I didn’t need to know more than that. I had watched my father and his numerous other women. I would not subject myself to that. It was obvious to me that Az was an important part of Rhys’ court. That meant I needed to find somewhere else to be. 

I stretched out my wings in the shadows, wondering what my next move should be. I had not tried to fly in so long I had no idea if I even could. I pushed off the ground and immediately realized that while I could fly, it would not be easy. I wouldn’t risk winnowing without a clear idea of where I wanted to go. So I curled back up into my shadows and hid there. Tonight, I would sleep. 

At some point, I began dreaming. My mind couldn’t rest, apparently and it started to wander. It quickly drew me back to the town house. At first, I thought it was Rhys pulling me in. I should have known though.


	15. Pleading Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel tries to explain more.

Rhys had told me it could be done but I struggled to believe him.

“I can’t help you do it, Az. It has to be something that you do.”

“I don’t know how,” I pointed out.

“I think you do. You may not realize it but there’s strength in that bond. Use it,” he urged. Then he left me to my empty room.

I took a deep breath before lying down on the bed. Rhys had given me some pointers. Relax as much as possible. Empty your mind. Focus on what you’re trying to do. In some regards it reminded me of training camp. I closed my eyes and worked to empty out my mind.

It didn’t take me long to find my focus. It was her. Cauldron knew, it had always been her, from the moment I saw her the first time, really truly saw her. I let my mind drift into that memory. 

The three of us were laughing as we ran across the field to the small house. Normally we’d have flown but today we were exhausted having spent the entire day doing flight drills. None of us wanted to use their wings if we didn’t have too. There was also dinner waiting for us thanks to Rhys’ mother. We never made it to the door though. A small, slight girl raced out the door into the arms of Rhys.  
“I missed you so much!” she screeched.  
Rhys laughed as he swept his sister up into his arms, hugging her, scooping her off the ground. His laugh filled the air as he spun her around.  
“I missed you too little sister!” he said, smiling. “I had no idea you were coming back with Mother!”  
“It’s better than that. Father says I can stay!” Her smile spread across her face.  
Rhys grinned. “How did you manage that?”  
“Oh, you know,” she said innocently, “just by being me.”  
Rhys roared with laughter and Cass chuckled.   
She glanced behind her brother. “Who are you?” she asked.  
Cass smiled at her. “She looks just like you Rhys.”  
“Yeah,” said Rhys, “Well, hands off, Cass.”  
“Like I’d ever even consider it.”  
“Myrrh, this is Cassian,” said Rhys pointing. “Stay away from him.” Cassian grinned at Myrrh who glanced up at her brother curiously. She didn’t say anything but Rhys chuckled.  
“And this,” Rhys continued, “is Azriel.” For a moment, she met my eye contact but then blushed and looked away. I remembered the feeling that overcame me in that moment.

“So, come on, tell me, what did you really do to get sent off? Father must have been pretty mad.”  
She looked up at her brother with her green eyes full of laughter. “It was Lucien’s idea though and nobody got hurt. Although, Lord Beron was awfully mad and I do feel bad about that. I can’t imagine that Lucien got off lightly. He told me that a young lady shouldn’t put men of high esteem into positions of difficulty.”  
“What did you do?” Rhys’ voice was full of concern.  
“I didn’t hurt him. Honest. I just scared him a little.” Her eyes told a very different story. She scared him a lot and it was funny.  
“Who, exactly, is him?” asked Rhys.  
“Eris.”  
“Ugh. Myrrh.” Rhys looked at his sister with disapproval and she finally showed some shame.   
“He deserved it. If you’d have seen him leering at Calanmai, Rhys. It was awful,” she said evenly.  
Rhys frowned.   
“Anyway,” she went on, “it was just shadows.”  
“Shadows?” I asked her curiously.  
She glanced back at me and nodded.  
“What did you do, exactly?” he asked her.  
“I can show you later. I can’t really explain it though,” she said. She looked away quickly.  
“Why were you at Calanmai, anyway. You’re only fifteen,” said Rhys.  
At that, Myrrh rolled her eyes and flounced back into the house. Cassian laughed.  
“She’s exactly like you Rhys,” he roared. “Exactly like you. Full of fire.”  
Rhys hit Cass as he walked by. “I mean it,” he said quietly. “If I ever find out you’ve bedded my sister…”   
Cassian nodded, his face serious. “I get it. Hands off.”  
Behind them, I felt the heat that crept into my cheeks. Rhys had talked about his sister. She was fifteen. I was only three years older than her. I was so intrigued by her.  
And I was curious about the shadow part.  
We went into the house and Rhys gave his mother a hug. She smiled warmly at all of us.  
“I take it Myrrh has told you that she is no longer to be unchaperoned.”  
Rhys laughed. “Is that what it’s called when you send a girl to a Illyrian camp?”  
His mother shook her head. “He can’t handle her. Cauldron knows I can’t really handle her. At least she’ll listen to you Rhysand.”  
He ran a hand through his hair and sighed.   
Dinner was uneventful. We talked about the training we had done that day and compared notes about the other boys there. Myrrh listened attentively. I noticed every detail about her. After dinner Rhys and Cass went outside to spar. I sat outside on the steps, watching them but listening.  
From the steps outside I heard her mother.   
“Go outside. Spend some time with your brother. Tomorrow you’ll start schooling with me, here. I expect you to work hard and listen. But I know you’ve missed him.”

And the memory seemed to do the trick. Suddenly, I found myself in her mind, connecting with her in what looked like a dream. 

“What do you want? To make me more miserable?”

“No. Please, just listen to me. Please?” I pleaded with her.

There was silence. I could still feel her so I knew she was there. I held my breath for a moment.

“Is that a yes?”

“Can you please just get this over with?” she asked sullenly

“Myrrh, I will be honest with you. Yes, I took Mor to my bed. More than once.”

“Thank you so much.” The sass in her voice reminded me of her brother but I decided not to tell her that in this moment.

“That’s all it ever was. It was a need that happened. It happened exactly twice and then never again because I couldn’t do it. She wasn’t you and that was what I wanted back. I thought that she might be able to help me feel better but I ended up feeling worse. Afterwards, I felt miserable and missed you even more. I have never wanted anyone other than you.”

I tried to flow that feeling toward her, how I actually felt. It wasn’t something that I talked about with anyone. Even Rhys had no idea, although he at least understood because of Feyre. Something about Myrrh was different though. Maybe because we were both shadowsingers and understood each other so well. Maybe if I actually knew the depth of Rhys’ feelings for Feyre it would be the same.

I waited, hoping that she would understand, that she would feel how desperately I wanted to have her back.

I don’t know how it happened but somehow she was sitting there next to me. Maybe she let down her guard and relaxed into me a little more. Maybe it was because it was a dream state and I could picture her. But there she was.

“You are my one love,” she whispered to me.

“I promise to protect you and love you until we are parted by death,” I whispered back.

The words were part of the Illyrian bonding ceremony, the one we had secretly done only a few months before she disappeared. The one that resulted in the same infinity mark that was on both of our wrists, linked to Rhys’ three stars.

“Come back?” I asked her.

“That may take awhile. I didn’t pay much attention to where I was going.”

“Nuala will lead you back through the shadows,” I told her.

She looked at me for a moment and then nodded. She vanished from my mind and I waited. I opened my eyes and sat up, listening in the darkness. Nuala appeared out of the shadows in the corner of my room and when I looked again, Myrrh stood with her. 

“I traveled through the shadows,” she murmured in amazement. 

“I can teach you,” I told her.

She nodded. “There’s a lot I need to relearn.”

“We’ll worry about that tomorrow,” I told her. I took a tentative step forward to see what her reaction would be. She watched me carefully before crossing the room to me. I stared into her eyes, that vivid green color I had never forgotten. I couldn’t explain how we got that close. Suddenly, I could feel her breath and we were nose to nose. I looked down at her and slid my arms around her the way I used to. And then I kissed her and forgot that the rest of the world even existed.


	16. New and Old

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh tells Rhys more about the night the camp was attacked.

I woke up the next morning and was surprised to see Azriel’s face. Just in case, I reached out to touch him, sure that I was still dreaming. He was solid though, as real as I was and sound asleep next to me in the bed.

The sun was peeking through the curtains, so it was daytime. I had no idea how long we had been asleep. I had no idea when we’d actually gone to sleep.

Az opened his eyes and smiled when he saw me next to him.

“You’re still here,” he murmured sleepily. “I thought you might be gone in the morning.”

“I’m not a shadow,” I teased him.

He grinned. “No, you’re not.”

He pulled me to him and kissed me gently. “This is new.”

“No it’s not. We spent plenty of nights in the same bed,” I reminded him.

“Yes. Today though, we don’t have to worry about hiding from your father.”

“Just my brother.”

“He’s got no room to talk. Trust me.” A yawn escaped him but a knock on the door made him open his eyes again. He glanced downward to make sure that we were both underneath covers or at least clothed before replying.

“What?”

“Can I come in?” came my brother’s voice.

Az leaned over and kissed me again, soft and gentle. 

“I guess,” Az replied as he stared into my eyes.

He looked up as my brother opened the door. 

Rhys tried to look anywhere but the bed that I was sharing with Azriel. I could hardly believe that I was here next to him. Memories of last night were lingering in my mind. I wondered what Az thought about it all. 

“Can you come downstairs after you get dressed? We have some questions.”

Az nodded at Rhys who quickly closed the door. Then he leaned over and kissed me again.

“You’re not convincing me to get out of bed you know.”

“Hmmm. Maybe we’ll stay here then and ignore Rhys.”

“I don’t think that he’ll like that much.” 

Az leaned over and kissed down my neck. “I don’t think I care much,” he whispered.

He pushed himself up a little and I met his eyes for the first time since I had come back to Velaris. 

“Ugh,” groaned Az. “Your brother is yelling at me now.”

I sighed and got out of the bed. On the door, a light blue gown was on a hanger. I glanced back at Az, curiously.

“Nuala,” he said simply. “She must have found it for you.”

We both got dressed and headed down the stairs, with Az close behind me. 

“They’ll be in the library,” he said.

I turned in the direction he pointed, reaching the doors and feeling his presence at my back. My shadows were completely back under my control, unseen. His were also carefully in his control but easily visible.

We walked into the room together and sat in the two empty chairs, opposite Rhys and Feyre. I glanced at Rhys with a question in my mind. He shook his head, telling me he’d address it later. It was odd positioning, making us almost equal to him and Feyre. 

“Myrrh, this is Amren,” said Rhys pointing to the dark haired fae that sat at the end of the table opposite Cass. Mor sat by herself off to the side with her arms crossed.

“So,” said Cass, “I assume there’s a story to be told.”  
I nodded. “Where do you want me to start?”  
“The night you vanished, for now,” said Rhys.   
“That night we had gotten most of the way to the camp but decided it was too late to go any further. I had also planned on meeting Az part way between where we stopped and where he was camped with his troops. I was behind the camp by several hours so that I could meet up with him.”  
Rhys frowned. “So you weren’t there at all when the attack happened?”  
I shook my head. Az had the good sense to not utter a sound although I felt him through our bond. He felt grateful that I hadn’t been there.  
“Az never arrived where we were supposed to meet. I assumed that he was held up by something else and was headed back to the camp when I ran into Amarantha. Or, more accurately, two of her men who held me there until she got there. She told me to come with her and I thought she was taking me to you. At least, until she cast this spell that turned out to be a glamour. She said that she was going to hold me at Hybern’s court because I would be useful.”  
Rhys snarled. I started at that. I had heard rumors of what had happened but I had no doubt that whatever Rhys may have done, he did it with the intentions of protecting the court.  
“Hybern sent me to Rask to stay with a family that was a supporter of his. And that’s where I stayed, locked in that glamour. And then one day, I was sitting in the library and, I felt the world shift. I knew the glamour was gone. My goal was to get away but without using my wings in so long, I couldn’t get off the ground. So I ran. I stole the sword and a horse. I booked passage on a ship to Prythian. As time passed I felt my magic gaining strength so I tried to send messages through the bonds as I travelled.”  
“That worked,” said Cass, “but neither one of them saw it for what it was. They both thought they were dreams.”  
How long have you been travelling?”  
“Almost three months, I would guess,” I replied. “I had to get across a large part of Hybern’s land and it wasn’t easy. He has spies everywhere so I could only travel at night. During the day I hid.”  
I felt Az through the bond, a mixture of pride and horror that I had travelled so far and made it without too much difficulty almost all the way back to Prythian. I sent back a rush of gratitude for everything that he had ever taught me about fighting and spying.  
Rhys sighed. “Will anyone be looking for you?”  
“I don’t know,” I told him honestly. “Several times, I thought I was being followed but then they would vanish. I haven’t seen anyone since I crossed the water but there could be people still looking for me. The rumors I heard of how Hybern died were confusing. There’s going to be a vacuum where his power was and plenty of people will want it. I never really knew how I fit into any of that.”  
Rhys nodded. He looked at Azriel and frowned.  
“Normally, Azriel would be the person checking on those things.”  
From the side of the room, I heard Lucien’s voice. “I’ll go.”  
Rhys looked at him and looked back at Az. “He does excellent work,” Az said simply.  
Rhys nodded again.  
“Fine. Lucien will go. For now, I want you here,” he said. “You’ll be safest here.”  
I nodded.


	17. Answers Lead to Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys gets some questions finally answered but only ends up with new questions.

I looked around the room and made some fast decisions. 

“Lucien, go with Cassian. Work out a plan and get back to me with it. Mor, continue to monitor the situation with Keir. Under no circumstances is he to know that Myrrh is alive and here. Amren, thank you for being here but there’s nothing that I need right now. You two, don’t move. We’re not done.”

The room emptied out and I stood to watch as everyone went to do as directed. 

“Feyre, would you please step out?”

I hated to ask her to leave but I needed to speak with Az and Myrrh alone. Feyre didn’t ask me any questions and left the room, closing the door behind her. I turned around and sat back down, across from them.

I took a deep breath. Figuring out where to start was the hard part. 

“Starfall?” I asked Az.

He took a breath and nodded, glancing at Myrrh.

“Yes,” Myrrh finally said. “Although, it started before that. But that was the first time that Az ever said anything to me.”

I turned back to my friend and watched his face. There was nothing there to suggest that wasn’t true but I also knew Azriel could hide anything if he wanted to.

“I knew long before then,” Az finally admitted to me. “I felt it from the first moment you introduced us. I used the shadows to learn about her since you wanted me to teach her. And we spent time together while I was teaching her but I didn’t do anything until that night.”

“Why?” I asked him. After all, he had spent countless hours with my sister up until then and by his own admission, he knew what he was feeling.

“You told Cass to keep his hands off. I didn’t think that you would want me to touch her either. so, I tried not to. I did well up until that night. Plus, there was your father to contend with. He had mentioned to me that he wanted protection for Myrrh and I wanted that job, obviously.”

I sighed. Yes, of course, Az would have wanted the job of protecting my sister. Their bond would have made it nearly impossible for him to stay away and that was probably as good a solution as any for him at that point. At least he’d know she was safe.

“Clearly,” said Az reluctantly, “I didn’t do a very good job there either.”

“Stop,” I told him firmly. “There was no way you could have known what was coming. Clearly Hybern had put plans into motion long before anyone realized.”

Az still looked mournful but I let it go. I turned my attention back to my sister.

“Can you fly? Can you use your magic?”

“I have gained back some of the strength I had magically. I never lost control of the shadows, really, but most of my other skills are out of practice. I doubt I could really keep anyone out of my head for any length of time. And, no, I don’t think I can fly. At least not very far.”

Azriel’s face looked as furious as mine probably did. As Illyrians, flight was the one thing that we kept as sacred. We would have to reteach Myrrh to fly quickly.

“What about other skills,” I asked after a moment.

“What other skills?” she asked me, trying for innocence.

“Don’t play with me, little sister. I know full well that Azriel taught you more than just shadows.”

I watched her shadows flare a little. I had gotten her ire up. That was good. I wanted that fire back in her and there were moments when I was worried it might go out.

“Let’s find out,” said Az simply.

I looked at him as he stood up and pulled out a sword. He offered it to my sister, who nodded. Az walked to the garden, catching the attention of both Lucien and Cassian who were still in the hallway, talking about something. They watched and then followed the three of us, curious as to what was going on.

Outside, Myrrh pulled her short sword, stolen from some poor fool.

“Are you sure?” asked Az watching her.

“Yes,” she answered him. “Unless you’re scared.”

Azriel grinned and took a stance opposite her. My sister grinned, matching him, holding her sword nearly perfectly. Azriel had more practice but I got the impression that Myrrh had determination on her side. After a moment Az moved forward and Myrrh moved out of his way quickly. She spun around and met his blade as he moved toward her back. I noticed her shadows flare out again. They were both enjoying this. 

I glanced back at Lucien, who was grinning watching this display. I raised an eyebrow at him and he shrugged back. He had clearly watched this before. Cassian’s face was one of pure interest. I could tell he doubted the Myrrh could best Azriel but she was clearly holding her own. 

Azriel went to move on her again and she ducked low, rolling out of his way. He quickly moved so she couldn’t surprise him from behind. The pair were more evenly matched then I realized. Azriel had taught her well. Whatever happened in the woods that resulted in her capture must have been magical because I doubted many people could take her in a sword fight. 

Azriel was looking around, trying to figure out his next tactic and wasn’t watching the ground closely enough. This was something that he had learned in war. He had good footing, so he wasn’t worried about the ground. My sister, apparently, found her advantage there. Moving faster than I would have thought she could, Myrrh slid across the grass enough to catch Azriel’s ankle. That was enough to throw him off balance and she was on her feet before he could react.

Lucien chuckled, watching the look of shock on Az’s face when he realized that she had him pinned with her sword. 

“Yield?” she asked him, breathing hard. 

Az nodded. She moved back slightly, letting him stand up, still watching him. Clearly, she wasn’t about to let him fool her. Az dropped his sword at her feet and laughed. 

“You win, I swear.”

“This time,” muttered Cassian, who clearly thought that Az needed to work on some things. Azriel gave him a dirty look and I stood there, watching my sister in amazement.

“Azriel taught you that?” I asked her.

“Yes. And no. I spent a lot of time watching you all at camp. I used to go practice out in the woods by myself while you were all in classes.”

Azriel grinned. “I caught her once and told her that I would teach her if she really wanted to know how to fight. She was a fast learner. I also taught her how to spy well, once she mastered some control over her shadows.”

“Speaking of that,” I said glancing around, “I’m curious which of you has more powerful shadow control.”

“Hard to say,” pointed out Cass. “Myrrh doesn’t need Siphons to control her power.”

“No,” said Azriel quickly, “but she’s powerful. I’d wager she’s as powerful as Rhys in her own way.”

“You can’t compare the two powers,” I pointed out.

“I know,” Az answered me, “but she has a lot of power. It took awhile for me to get her to a place where she could channel it well.”

I frowned. I had known for an incredibly long time that my sister was a shadowsinger. Long before she knew and before I knew Az. She played with shadows like they were her friends and it scared me in some regards. Especially when I considered the display from last night. If that was any indication, she could have easily killed us all with shadows. 

“What can she do though?” asked Cass. “Last night, we saw raw power, but that doesn’t mean much if it’s not controlled.”

I hardly saw Myrrh flinch but I didn’t miss the shadow that had formed behind Cassian. Azriel watched, without a word. The shadows enveloped him and I heard him cry out in the darkness but couldn’t see anything. 

“Enough,” muttered Az. 

She released the hold she had on Cass, who was on the ground and looked pale. 

“How did you do that?” he asked her, shakily.

“Is that controlled enough for you?” she asked him icily.

Cassian got to his knees but didn’t look like he wanted to stand. 

“What did she do?” I asked him as I knelt down next to him.

Cassian shook his head and looked back up at her. “I didn’t think you were a daemati.”

“I’m not,” she answered him, looking perplexed.

I puzzled over this. How could Cass think she was daemati, unless she was getting inside his head? But she’d never been able to do that before, so how could she do it now? I called for Feyre. I needed her help with this.


	18. Untapped Power

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Az always assumed that Myrrh was a shadowsinger like him but is she?

Rhys walked back inside, leaving all of us in the garden. I checked with Cass, who was still on the ground and looked shaken. 

“There’s no way Az. She’s got to be daemati. Only Rhys could do something like that.”

I frowned. Myrrh had never shown any inclination to be daemati. The only people she had ever been inside of their heads were mine and Rhys’. She held a bond to both of us that allowed that to happen. Unless, it didn’t, normally.

“Rhys,” I shouted after him.

He was sitting in the library. He glanced up as I chased him inside. 

“Your parents,” I started, “could they communicate like that?”

“What? I don’t know. I never asked.”

“Lucien, can you hear Elain in your head?”

“No,” he answered me, perplexed. “I wish I could sometimes.”

I turned back to Rhys triumphantly. “I always assumed that she could get into my head because she’s my mate but nobody else has that happen. So how else could she get into my mind?”

“But I can’t get into anyone else’s mind,” Myrrh pointed out.

“You just did though. You got into Cassian’s. You just didn’t realize what you did.”

Rhys sat up and stared into the distance thoughtfully. At that moment, Feyre came into the room and looked around curiously. Rhys looked up at her.

“I need you to try something, if you’re both ok with it,” he said to Feyre slowly.

Feyre sat down next to him.

“What’s that?”

“Let Myrrh try to get into your head.”

Feyre stared at Rhys like he was out of his mind.

“I need to know if she can. She has no bond to you but you can open your mind enough to make it easy for her.”

Sighing, Feyre nodded. Rhys stood up and pointed at the chair he had been in.

“Sit here.”

Myrrh sat down, looking alarmed. Rhys got down and looked into her eyes.

“Listen to me. I want you to try and get into Feyre’s mind. However you think you can do it. Just get inside. You’ll know if you do.” He glanced back at Feyre, who nodded.

“I don’t know how,” she told him earnestly.

“Just try, ok?”

Myrrh took a deep breath and nodded at Rhys. She looked back at Feyre. Feyre was trying to be a blank slate. She sat quietly and didn’t say anything. I knew full well that Feyre had likely sectioned off part of her mind so that Myrrh could only get in so far. Myrrh closed her eyes and we waited.

Suddenly, Feyre’s eyes went wide and she looked up at Rhys. “She did it. But I don’t think she knows that she’s there.” Feyre was whispering and I looked over at Myrrh, who had an intense look of concentration on her face.

In an instant, Myrrh opened her eyes, almost pushed back in the chair and Feyre jumped up, looking shocked.

“What happened?” Rhys asked Feyre.

“I had to get her out, Rhys. She nearly got through my wall.”

Rhys turned back to Myrrh who looked frustrated. “I told you I can’t do it.”

Rhys’ face showed surprise. “You did though.”

“Why doesn’t she know what she’s doing?” wondered Cassian. Rhys shook his head. 

“More importantly, what does she know that she doesn’t even realize.” Rhys paused. “If she’s been doing this without realizing it, she may have information saved that would be useful to us. But first, we need to figure out how she can control it.”

“Daemati have to be trained. How has she managed this long without someone realizing?” I asked Rhys.

Rhys sighed before turning to face me. “Az, I”m beginning to think someone did know.”

I must have looked perplexed but Rhys just looked back at his sister.

“Who?” Feyre finally asked.

“Our father,” replied Rhys angrily.


	19. The Ties That Bind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys considers what kind of power Myrrh might have.

I stood there watching my sister, replaying conversations in my mind. Things I had heard that made no sense. Things that I had seen and not understood. Things that were now falling into place, almost like a puzzle.

My father had kept a close tether on my sister for years. From the earliest I could remember, he never let her leave the house without someone with her. She had been sheltered, and I had been her only company most of the time. Wherever I went, she went. Then the decision was made to send me to the training camp. My mother had insisted and my father had been enraged by her insistence. He had tried repeatedly to say no but in the end, my mother won. I was eight when I left, and my sister was only five. My mother came to the camp frequently but rarely brought Myrrh with her. 

By then, we knew that I was a daemati. I had learned some control over it, and as I got older, I learned more and more control. But the camps were a place for me to learn to be Illyrian. For a long while, my two worlds were at constant odds with each other. Cassian was my first friend there and he was my sounding board. I took me a long time to figure out how to make the two worlds work together.

When I was thirteen, my mother suddenly began bringing my sister to the camp with her. She had strict rules that Myrrh should not be around most of the Illyrians at camp. Cass and Az were not allowed near the cabin for a couple of years when my mother had Myrrh with her. Generally, she went with my father, everywhere he went, as he tried to find a suitable arrangement for her. Which really meant a suitable arrangement for my father.

Then, suddenly, when I was eighteen, everything changed. Myrrh was only fifteen but my father decided he wanted her out of the house and out of the court. I never gave it much thought but now I realized that Myrrh must have been beginning to show him her powers. And he, being the asshole he was, decided she was a liability.

“Myrrh, what happened right before you got sent to camp? With father? Did he say anything? Go anywhere?” 

She sighed, trying to think back. “What time frame are you thinking about?” 

“Maybe in the year before that? When you were say, fourteen?”

“That’s when we met,” said Lucien quietly. 

I turned and looked at him. “She was at Autumn Court?”

“Sure,” Myrrh said from behind me, “all the time.”

“What did you do while you were there?”

“I sat in large rooms with lots of people I didn’t know and listened. I didn’t do much. I enjoyed the time at night when there weren’t meetings. Although, every once in awhile father would have me come to his room at night and there were other people there.”

I frowned.

“After the meetings, did he ever ask you questions?”

She shook her head. “No. I’d have awful dreams sometimes though. It was so boring I think I was trying to make up for it with nightmares.”

“What are you thinking Rhys?” came Azriel’s quiet voice.

“He was using her. I don’t know how but I think he was using that untapped ability to his advantage. Why else would he bring her to meetings? But then why send her away? Something must have happened. Did anything odd happen right before he decided to send you to camp?”

She shook her head. “Not that I remember.”

I decided I needed to think on things some more. An untrained daemati was dangerous. She would have to learn to control what she was doing. In the meantime, I had other issues that she needed to work on.

“Az, lets get her back in the air.”


	20. Flight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel begins to help Myrrh take flight again.

I grinned. 

“No problem, Rhys. I have just one favor to ask you.”

“What’s that?” he asked cautiously.

“I need to use the cabin to do it.”

Rhys looked at me hesitantly. I could guess what he was thinking. But I was more of the mind that there was a lot of open space and it was secluded.

Finally, he nodded. “It’s secluded and that’s a good thing,” he said, echoing some of my thoughts.

Leaving took preparation. I talked with Rhys for the rest of the day about how this would work. He wanted regular updates. I wanted to be able to work with her without her worrying. By the end of the day, we came to the conclusion that he would check in with me once every day around lunch time.

The next morning, Myrrh and I woke up, at the cabin. We had travelled the previous night and decided that starting with first light was the best option. Outside, it was cold enough that we were both shivering.

“Ok, show me what you can still do.”

I remembered Myrrh before, the way she could take sudden turns that scared plenty of Illyrians at camp or the dives that she used to take that bordered on insanity when she swooped upward at the last second. I was heartbroken.

She managed to get up into the air but she was shaky and weak. I could easily take her out of the air without effort. She managed to stay in flight for about thirty seconds before gliding down to the ground and landing with a thud. 

We started at the beginning, short flights upward and back down. Straight lines, just to build some strength in the long disused muscles. We worked on it all day and to her credit, she never complained. More than once she looked downhearted at how little distance she could get but every time she would try again. I was dreading having to update Rhys. 

When Rhys arrived the next day, he didn’t look pleased. In fact, he opted to stay, getting up into the sky with her to try and work with her himself. I didn’t know if he had any other things he was working on but he was determined to see her in flight again.

Everyday after that Rhys was back at lunch time and left just before dinner. We continued to work, and surprisingly, every day she seemed to get stronger. By the time a week had passed, she was able to travel a decent distance and I had no doubt that it was only a matter of time before she would be back to her old self.

The end of that week meant that Rhys was going to be gone for several days. He hadn’t explained why, simply said he needed to attend to something and that we should keep working. 

“That was good!” I told Myrrh as she landed a quick turn.

She smiled at me and reached over to give me a hug, brushing one of my wings in the process. A feeling of pleasure shot through me.

“Hey, careful.”

“Oh, I’m sorry Az. That was an accident.”

I looked at her, not believing a word of it, considering the wicked grin that passed across her face for a moment. 

My wings were still pretty beat up from the war and while the large damage was healed there were still sections that needed more time. That meant that these workouts were tiring for me as well as her and I sighed.

“Let’s get inside before it gets much colder. The sun’s about to set.” In truth I wanted to stay outside because the setting sun was reflecting off of her hair, making it look like obsidian and I loved every moment of it. There were also pieces that were falling out of the braid that she had done that morning, giving her a wild look.

Once we got in the cabin, I reached up and brushed her hair back out of her face.   
I smiled at Myrrh slyly before continuing. “I owe you for that ‘accidental’ brush of my wing before.”  
She had the presence of mind to at least look ashamed.  
I leaned over and kissed her letting my hands wander across her back coming close to her wings but not touching them. I felt her shiver as I brushed my hand downward. I trailed kisses down towards her neck and stopped to whisper “I missed you.”  
She sighed.  
I pulled her sleeve up and looked at the tattoo on her arm. It was still there, just like mine, the mark of our bond to each other. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her as close as I possibly could. I could feel our bond grow stronger. I breathed in her scent and kissed her again.   
“I thought that by now you might have found someone else to love, to take my place,” she said quietly.  
I shook my head and brushed my hair back out of my eyes.   
“Nobody could ever replace you.”  
She wrapped her arms around my neck and I wrapped my arms around her before surrounding her with my wings.   
I shook my head again. I was angry at people who were dead and there was nothing I could do to change it. Shadows were flaring around me.  
“Azriel, stop. There’s no point in getting angry about the past. I have you again and that’s all I care about.”  
“They kept you from me. I did nothing to help you.”  
“What were you going to do? Single handedly kill Amarantha? Or Hybern? And besides, they knew nothing of the bond. They wanted to get at my father, I think.”  
“So you escaped death at the hands of Spring Court to end up trapped for three centuries,” I muttered.  
“And I am alive. Fate intervened there. So what now?”

“What happens now,” I said quietly, “is that you come with me, to bed so I can ask forgiveness.”  
“Surely you need rest?” she teased.  
I grinned. I knew that tone of voice although it had been a long time since I had last heard it. I didn’t say anything else though. I simply took her hand and led her to the bed we had been sharing.


	21. Change of Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh is brought to Amren who reveals some information.

I woke up next to Az and had to touch him. Only after feeling his arm was solid was I willing to accept that I wasn’t dreaming. This was real. I had found my way to home, found my brother, and Azriel. These past few days felt like a whirlwind and a million years long all at once. I wondered if I would ever be able to wake up without him next to me and not panic. He was sleeping peacefully and I took some time to memorize his face again. I had traced my way across dozens of scars on his body and wings that I didn’t remember. His face was the one thing that I knew hadn’t changed.   
He opened his eyes and blinked before smiling at me.  
“Good morning?”  
I laughed. “Is it morning?”  
“Probably close enough,” he said. “Back to the air.”  
I grumbled.  
Az slipped an arm around my waist, pulling me toward him. He kissed me gently before speaking again.  
“I mean it. Let’s get dressed.”  
Reluctantly I got up and found some clothes. When we both had layered on some things, we headed outside to the fresh snow.

Rhys and Cassian were sitting at the table with food. I picked up some toast and began to eat, watching my brother closely. Something had changed because he wasn’t supposed to be here today.

Azriel walked into the room and his eyes widened. “I thought you were going to -”

“Change of plans,” Rhys replied cutting him off. “We,” he said pointedly, “are going to see Amren.”

Azriel’s face shifted into a frown. “Why?”

“Because she has access to information that we don’t,” Rhys replied lazily.

Cass looked at me. “How far can you fly?”

“How far do I have to go?” I asked him.

“There’s my little sister,” Rhys mumbled under his breath.

Az took a breath and shook his head. “I don’t like this Rhys.”

Rhys looked at Azriel carefully for a moment. “Is there something you don’t want me to find out?” he finally asked.

“I do have secrets,” Az replied. “Some things I’d just rather keep to myself.”

Flying back to Velaris was not as difficult as I feared it would be. I was somewhat worried because Azriel had a constant flow of worry coming down our shared bond. I had no idea who Amren was but she clearly had some power. I was enjoying flight again though and some of that joy was creeping through because when we landed my brother looked at me with a smile.

I followed Rhys into the fanciest apartment I may have ever seen. Sitting in a chair, looking bored was a beautiful, graceful looking High Fae. She didn’t look familiar to me, so I waited for an introduction.

“So, does she bow to me or not Rhysand?”

I looked up at my brother, confused. “No, Amren.”

The elegant looking woman scoffed and I frowned a little.

“Oh! She has a fiery spirit, just like you. I would love to see her and Morrigan go at it.”

I ignored her comment, waiting to hear what my purpose was here.

“I mean, they have before, obviously, but I’d like to see it again. Maybe Morrigan would come off better this time.”

I could feel the annoyance coming off of Azriel.

“Relax, shadowsinger,” came the arrogant voice again.

A book sat on the table next to her and I was curious as to what it was or what it was used for. It seemed to almost glow.

“Amren,” Rhys said lazily, “I explained everything to you already. I need to know what she can and cannot do.”

“Fine, fine. Come here Myrrh.”

I guessed that Rhys had told her my name but I still hesitated.

“I need you to touch the book, that’s all,” Amren said. “I don’t have all day though. Can we hurry up?”

I glanced back at Az, who nodded. He didn’t seem afraid of this woman, just as though he didn’t really like her. I crossed the room to where the book sat on the table.

“Any place in particular that I need to touch?” I asked.

She flipped the book open to a page she had marked and pointed to a blank page. I put the palm of my hand down on the book and gasped. The book was definitely glowing. In fact, it was warm. 

The woman next to me began to chant something, reading off the facing page. I wished I knew what it looked like to the others but I felt strange, like something was pouring into and back out of me.

“You can move your hand now.”

I took my hand back and glanced at the page, which was now covered in writing. It wasn’t any language I recognized though.

Amren looked at the page for several minutes and began writing some things in a notebook. 

Az and Rhys watched her carefully while Cassian seemed to be preoccupied with something else. He kept glancing around the room.

Finally, Amren looked up from the book. “Alright, what do you want to know, exactly?”

“What did it tell you?” Rhys asked quickly.

“A lot. What do you want to know?”

Rhys sighed. I could tell he was hoping for more information but he started with a simple question.

“What are her magical abilities?”

“She’s a shadowsinger. But you already knew that. Why are you asking me?”

“She can’t do anything else?”

“Nope.”

Rhys frowned. 

“She is pretty powerful for a shadowsinger though,” Amren finally said. “She might be able to give that one a run for his money.” She nodded at Az.

“How is she getting into people’s heads then, if she had no powers of the daemati?” 

“Clearly you’ve never met a very powerful shadowsinger, Rhysand.”

Cassian shrugged and glanced at Azriel who was watching Amren carefully.

“Is that it?”

“Is there anything else important I should know about her?” Rhys finally asked.

“The book seems to think that she will somehow change things for Illyrians. There was some mention of her mate.” At this, Amren looked up at Azriel.

“How?,” Rhys pressed.

“I can’t tell you that. Some things can’t be known.” Amren shrugged.

Rhys sighed. “Alright, thank you Amren. We’ll go.”

I turned to go, following Rhys out of the apartment.

“One more thing.” The four of us turned to look back at her.

Amren looked right at Azriel. “You might not realize what you did that night, but the bond you forged was more than you thought it was. Sometimes it’s dangerous to go to priestesses, shadowsinger. But it might explain some of Rhysand’s questions too, if you could find out what she actually did.”

Azriel frowned before putting himself between me and Amren and walking out of the apartment.


	22. Fear and Frustration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys begins to understand his sister's motivations and comes up with a plan for moving forward.

Whatever Amren meant by her last comment, I was not going to discuss it until we were far away from prying eyes. I sent a silent message to all three of them. Home. Now.

Thankfully, none of them argued, although I expected that Azriel might take some issue with my instructions. We walked home on the fast side but something about what Amren said had Cassian on edge. His hand rested on his sword the entire time as if he expected to be attacked.

I walked into the house and found myself taking the familiar path to the library where I sat down, trying to work out in my head what was happening here. To their credit, all three followed me.

“So, she’s not daemati?” Cassian said, sounding as perplexed as I felt.

“Apparently not.” I looked up at Azriel. “What do you know about shadowsinger powers?”

Azriel shrugged. “Just what I’ve learned. How to control and manipulate the shadows. I can use them to move, spy, hide. I imagine that Myrrh can do the same.”

“What did she mean though about giving Az a run? I don’t think that I can do any more than he can.”

I frowned, thoughtfully. Azriel’s training was limited to what the Illyrians knew. What if there was more to that power, that the Illyrians didn’t know? What if, as High Fae, it gave her access to other powers? We would have to work that out. The only other immediate question that I had involved Amren’s last comment.

“What did she mean by the bond you forged was more than what you thought, Azriel? And what priestess was she referring to?”

Azriel and Myrrh exchanged a look and I didn’t like it. They had obviously not mentioned something to me and I was beginning to get the feeling that it was big.

Az took a breath before looking at me and taking a step backwards.

“Azriel,” my tone was one of warning.

“I’ll tell you. I just want to get out of arm’s reach first.”

“What did you do?” asked Cassian curiously.

“The priestess she mentioned, that was an Illyrian priestess. An old one who knew the ancient rites,” Azriel began.

I looked at him and didn’t say anything, although I was sure that my face was telling him he was on thin ice right now.

“Myrrh and I had talked about getting married but we knew your father wouldn’t allow it.”

I nodded.

“We were also concerned that he might try to marry her to somebody without warning.”

I frowned. My father might have tried it. I had ideas about who he might have meant to marry her to as well.

“I asked one of the older instructors at camp if he knew of any Illyrian rites that would act like a marriage. He told me about the ancient rites and that there were a few priestesses who might know the rites. He told me where to find one and I went and asked her to perform a binding rite.”

I stood up quickly and Azriel took three steps backwards. Instead I turned to my sister, angrily. “Are you out of your mind? Do you even know what you did?”

To her credit, Myrrh didn’t back down. I wasn’t surprised because she never backed down from me or our father and clearly this wasn't something that had changed about her.

“I was not going to be married off to the highest bidder.” she snarled at me.

“Oh no, but you’ll go find some old priestess who will perform a rite you know nothing about?” I shouted.

I noticed that while Cassian had backed up, Myrrh and I were nearly toe to toe.

“What would you know about it Rhysand? You never had to worry about. You weren’t going to stop it. You always told me to behave and do what was best for the court.”

“So what if you’d had to marry Lucien?” I asked back, screaming.

I didn’t expect her to slap me, but she hit me so hard that I fell backwards and Cassian actually drew breath inward.

“You stupid bastard,” she screamed back. I saw Feyre at the doorway, clearly wondering what was going on. She had referred to me as such more than once but my sister had never called me that and it shook me.

“You do not call me that,” I snarled back, using my mind to push her backwards. She pushed right back with her shadows.

“It was never Lucien, Rhysand,” she screamed angrily. Azriel stepped up behind her, clearly afraid that she might lose control of the shadows again. “He wanted me to marry Eris!”

Azriel did not look surprised by that information but the force with which she yelled at me made me fall back into the chair again.

“Eris?” I finally asked more calmly.

Azriel nodded.

“And I suppose you were how she found this out?” I asked him suspiciously.

“Sort of. She used shadows to spy on your father but I taught her how to do it. And I’m the one that told her she should find out what her father was doing in all the meetings he was having with Autumn Court.”

Azriel had pulled Myrrh close to him and I could feel the calming waves coming off of him. He was clearly focused on her but wanted both of us to be calmer. Whatever he was doing was definitely soothing her.

Cassian finally spoke. “So, what was the rite that you had done?”

“She told me it was an Illyrian bonding rite, like a Fae marriage but between Illyrians.” replied Az with a shrug. “We were desperate, so we made a decision fast.”

I sighed. There was no real way to know what the rite was. I wasn’t well versed in them and I didn’t know anyone who was. 

“Cass, see if you can get someone on this. I’d like to at least know exactly what was done so that I have an idea of whether or not it’s a problem.”

He nodded at me. 

He slipped out of the room before I could say anything else.

I turned back to Myrrh. “You’re sure this rite was somehow binding?”

My sister replied by simply turning her left arm over. On the inside of her arm was my mark, a symbol of her vow to be loyal to me and directly above it sat an infinity loop, just below her wrist. I looked at Az, who turned his left wrist over to show me the same thing. His was much more hidden because of the other marks that he bore but it was still there, obvious for anyone who might look for it. 

“So it’s binding. DId either of you notice anything after the rite?” I asked trying to assess what I could from their knowledge.

They both nodded. “It might be easier for me to just show you Rhys,” Myrrh said, sitting down next to me. I nodded, slipping into her mind and letting her lead me through the memory.

Lucien sat down in the nearest chair and sighed. Myrrh swept across the room and gave him a hug.  
“You know I appreciate this, more than I can tell you.”  
“Yeah, yeah,” he grinned at her. “Just don’t get caught. I don’t want to know what your father would do to me if he found out I was aiding and abetting his daughter instead of just courting her.”  
Myrrh giggled.   
“So where should I tell anyone looking for you that you’ve gone?”  
“Tell them I’ve gone to my room for a few moments.” She flipped her hair over her shoulder. “Remember to look innocent.”  
“Well, since I am, that shouldn’t be a problem. When will you be back?” Lucien glanced at the clock in the corner.   
“Give me a couple hours?” she asked him.  
He nodded.   
Even her father, who tried to act like it bothered him, let the two of them be alone for a couple of hours.  
Myrrh darted across the room to the balcony and looked around. The setting sun cast long shadows that she could use to her advantage. She hopped off the balcony and let her wings glide her to the ground. She checked around her again. Nobody was around. She thought carefully for a moment and stepped into darkness coming out a breath later in front of a cabin in the mountains. She smiled.  
She ran to the front door and slipped inside and was greeted with a hug. She squealed with surprise.  
“Az! You scared me!”  
He laughed at her. “Who else would be here? And why would I have grabbed them like that?” he teased.  
He released her from the hug and gently kissed her.  
Myrrh sank into his kiss, relishing every minute of it. She tangled her hands into his hair, enjoyed his hands roaming across her body.  
Finally, they paused. “How long did Lucien give us?” asked Az.  
“A couple hours,” she told him.  
“Good.” Az pulled Myrrh onto the couch with him and she curled up next to him with her head on his shoulder. He reached over and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “I have a question for you,” he said seriously.  
Myrrh looked at him curiously.   
“I found a priestess through an older Illyrian that I know. She lives not far from the training camp,” he continued. “She says that she can do a bonding rite for us.”  
Myrrh’s eyes went wide. Her heartbeat quickened as she thought about what he was asking her.   
“Are you sure you still want to do this?” Az asked her.  
“Let’s do it,” Myrrh said, her head feeling a little light.  
“We can wait if you want” he told her.  
“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t trust my father. He could send me tomorrow.” She pulled herself into his lap and kissed him again. “Can she do it now?”  
“We’ll find out,” he replied. The two held hands as Az winnowed them to a quiet area of the forest near the training camp he had once lived at. It was dark here and the woods were dense. Slowly, Az moved through the trees and suddenly a small cottage came into view. He knocked on the door and waited.  
An extremely old woman opened the door and smiled. “So you have come.”  
Azriel nodded. “Can you do what we discussed?”  
“Yes,” said the older woman, “If you have payment. My, my, High Fae is she?”  
“No,” Myrrh said. “I’m half.”   
“It’s fine dear,” the older woman said answering a question Myrrh hadn’t asked.   
The cottage was warm and cramped with only two rooms. She motioned for them to come into the other room. Azriel was watching carefully, clearly not trusting this woman much.  
“You are both here of your own free will and wish to be bonded?” the old lady asked.  
“Yes,” they answered together.   
“You’re sure. Most bonds are not easily broken.”  
“We’re sure,” Myrrh said, trying to be polite.   
“Very well. Hold hands.” She watched them as Azriel took Myrrh’s left hand with his. Even within the memory, I felt the surprise at the magical presence that seemed to fill the room.  
“You are entering into a bond. This is not to be done lightly. Understand that it will tie you to one another for the rest of your days. This bond can only be broken by death.”  
Az took a breath and the woman looked at him, suspiciously.   
“This bond means that you will be bound to one another, that you must protect one another. The Mother decrees it. This bond is different from others. This bond links your hearts, your souls and your future. Know that it is strong, powerful and very little can disturb it. No other vow can replace it.”  
As she spoke, the air in the room seemed to shift.   
“You are both shadowsingers. Interesting. I’m sure the Cauldron has an interesting path for you both.” She nodded at them. “It is done.”  
Azriel put Myrrh in front of him and guided her out the door. He walked with her all the way to the edge of the woods and waited until they were safely back at the cabin before he let his guard down.  
He flipped his arm over and saw it. A small infinity loop on his wrist almost obscured by other marks that had been given to him. Myrrh looked at her arm and saw the same mark. Hers was more obvious but it blended almost seamlessly into another mark with a moon and three stars above it.  
Az ran his hand over her wrist and smiled at her. He pulled her close to him and kissed her, then looked into her eyes and whispered, “Mine.”  
Myrrh looked into his eyes and smiled. “Always.”  
I slipped out of her mind, not needing or wanted to see any more than what I just had. There had been a lot of magic in that room and I was worried about what exactly the old lady had meant. 

“Links your heart and your soul. No other bond can replace it. So you were counting on the fact that even if father tried to marry you, there was something else that would get in the way.”

“Something like that,” my sister replied flippantly. “Or, you know, I care about Azriel that much.”

I took two calming breaths before I spoke. “Ok but if you had asked for help, I might have been able to do something. I don’t doubt that you care about him or that he cares about you but that was just a dumb move. You don’t know what she did. What if Az had died in the war? Would you have died too?” I snapped at her at the end, frustrated that she didn’t see how bad this could have been.

Azriel finally spoke up. “She didn’t do this alone and honestly, after the separation we just endured, I think I would rather die than have to live the rest of my life without her. Also, there is the small matter of the fact that you keep trying to hit me because I’m in love with your sister.”

I stared at him stunned. That was the first time I had heard him say that he loved her and the way he said it left no question in my mind that it was true. Somehow, the two of them had fallen in love and I never saw it. 

“More practically,” I said slowly, “how were you planning on explaining that to father if he did try and send you to Autumn Court to marry Eris.”

“I guess we’d have run at that point.” she shrugged.

I had always been the more reasonable of us and that was probably saying a lot. My sister had my independent streak but also an attitude that she would find a way to make something work when and if she had to, not before.

I had forgotten about Cass standing near the door until he spoke. “Do I need to figure out what this rite is?”

“If we can,” I said. “In the meantime, maybe we need to figure out how to handle this from a practical stand point.”

“What does that mean?” Az asked me pointedly.

“It means that my sister is a part of the Night Court. I can’t act like she’s still dead because eventually, that will be found out. I can’t ignore it. She holds a position of power, whether we want her to or not because of who she is.We need to decide how we are going to present this to everyone else. Especially Keir.”

Azriel shook his head, thinking about the multiple implications in what I said. “I don’t want anyone to know.”

“I understand that Azriel, but it’s not like I can pretend she isn’t here or that she’s someone else. As Cassian once pointed out, she looks exactly like me. People will notice and they’ll talk. The last thing I want is Eris showing up asking for my sister as some kind of prize. We need to make it clear that she holds rank and she is not touchable. Or at the very least that the person asking has to go through me.”

“What does that mean Rhys?” asked Cassian slowly.

“It means that Myrrh needs to become a part of this court or at the very least, to the outside world she needs to look like a part of my court.”

I frowned. I needed to find a position that would show trust in my sister for this to work. I couldn’t disrupt my current inner circle too much though. I had one obvious choice in mind but it was not going to go over well.

“Cauldron above, Rhys, you’re crazy,” Myrrh muttered.

“You don’t even know what I’m thinking.”

“Rhys, I know you well enough to have a good idea about where your ideas are taking you. I don’t see that you’ve changed much in the last few centuries. If this is going where I think it’s going, well... She’ll kill me.”

I looked up at her. “Do you have a better idea?”

She shook her head and then glanced at Az who seemed to read Myrrh’s mind.

“She will never speak to you or me ever again,” whispered Azriel, going pale.

“She’ll get over it,” I said more calmly than I felt.

Cass sat down. “I don’t like where this sounds like it’s going.”

Finally, Feyre spoke from the doorway, sounding frustrated. “Rhys, what are you thinking?”

“This is the only way that we can make Keir believe that Myrrh holds power in the court. I mean,” I interjected quickly, “I do trust you. You’re my sister but at this point, I have no role for you in the court.”

“I don’t want a role in the court,” replied Myrrh quickly.

“I know, but Keir will see that as a weakness. We can’t let him think that you’re expendable or he’ll do something rash.”

Myrrh shook her head at me. “You’re the High Lord and I swore loyalty to you. If this is what you want to do, then I’ll play along but I don’t think this is a good idea at all.”

“Feyre, we need to find Myrrh something to wear. We’re going to make her my third.”


	23. A Good Defense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plan takes shape and Azriel begins to tell Rhys what exactly happened in AUtumn Court so long ago.

I argued with Rhys for what felt like hours on end. But Rhys was stubborn and when he decided something, he committed all the way. Rhys had also decided that the reactions needed to be as genuine as possible, at least on Morrigan’s side. So, he had decided the best way to break the news to Mor was to not tell her at all. I still wasn’t sure this was a good idea but Rhys was adamant that it would work better this way.  
“Are you sure about this?” I asked him for about the hundredth time. “The last time you failed to warn Mor, she was pissed for weeks.”  
Rhys simply nodded. I had a feeling that he was working very hard to keep calm. He needed Myrrh’s appointment to be official in the Court and for her to take power legitimately.  
“Mor will challenge her and I know that Myrrh can handle herself with a sword,” he said quietly.  
I glared at Rhys, not liking this idea at all. I knew perfectly well that Myrrh could handle a sword. She had spent plenty of time training to fight under Rhys’ supervision when she was younger. I had seen what she could still do with Cassian. She managed to escape back to Prythian with nothing but a short sword. She was capable of fighting and spying. However, there was always a chance that something could go wrong though and that was my biggest fear. Rhys had warned me I couldn’t interfere. And I wasn’t so sure that Myrrh could handle apissed off Morrigan.  
Myrrh and Morrigan had known each other since they were very young. I remembered Myrrh telling me that Morrigan had never liked her much and often referred to her as the Princess of the Night Court. The biggest issue between them had always been that Myrrh was half Illyrian but she was still the daughter of the High Lord of the Court. Morrigan was High Fae and her family had ruled the Night Court before Rhys’ family. This was a serious point of contention. Myrrh had admitted to me once that she thought Morrigan also hated her because she was never given to anyone for marriage. Myrrh knew that a part of that was her Illyrian blood. It was difficult to marry off a daughter that most High Fae looked down on as less than. Morrigan also never knew that Myrrh almost became Eris’ bride, a situation that Myrrh would have despised as much as Morrigan.  
Morrigan was thought to be incredibly powerful because her power was obvious. It was likely that if anyone knew how powerful Myrrh really was she would have been more valued. Rhys was starting to consider that his father may have realized this. I was concerned with nothing except the safety of my partner.  
Feyre and Myrrh walked in the room and I was taken a bit aback. Feyre presented herself as High Lady of the Night Court and tended to dress as she had under the mountain. That was not surprising.   
Myrrh had a different idea about how to present herself, however. She was about to be named Rhys’ third which was a position that warranted power. She dressed herself in Illyrian leathers and tied her long black hair back into a braid. She was carrying two swords, although I wasn’t sure where she had gotten them. Cass was the most likely choice.   
More importantly, she and Feyre had clearly worked on making it look as though she had more tattoos than she actually did because they ran all the way up her arms. They had done a very good job of it because I was impressed. Cass and I were covered in the markings of Illyrian warriors. While she and Feyre had obviously been cautious, they also wanted to try and prove something.  
“Whoa,” murmured Cass under his breath. “Do you think that you can justify all that?”  
Myrrh gave Cassian a grin before “What do you think?”  
“Maybe if you don’t cheat, I can kick your ass.” Cass’ voice was full of teasing. “Honestly, you look good.”  
I agreed. She looked powerful. I had to take a deep breath. I also had to remember my role and keep myself in check down there. She smiled at me across the room.   
What do you think? She whispered down our bond.  
I nodded and sent the lust I felt back down our bond at her.  
I saw her blush.  
Rhys meanwhile smacked Cass in the back of his head.  
“What was that for Rhys?” asked Cass as he rubbed his head.  
“My sister is hands off, remember?”  
“You are talking to the wrong Illyrian, Rhys,” said Cass with a wink at me.  
I tried to look innocent as Rhys glanced over at me. “Az, make sure you keep it under control. I don’t want her to fight if she doesn’t have to.”  
“I can fight, Rhys,” snapped Myrrh.  
“I know that. I said I don’t want you to. There’s a difference, little sister.”   
I took a breath in and focused myself.   
“Are we ready?” asked Rhys. He looked around the room. He had sent Mor ahead several minutes ago to make sure he was expected.  
Myrrh and Feyre nodded and Myrrh took Feyre’s arm. The two winnowed to the entrance to the Court of Nightmares leaving just me, Rhys and Cass.  
“I hope you know what you’re doing,” said Cassian evenly, “because if you don’t, you’ve just created a huge problem.”  
“Me too,” replied Rhys. “But we’re committed now. Mor will become an emissary to the Court of Nightmares and Myrrh will be my third. Mor will get over it once I explain it all.”  
“If she doesn’t kill Myrrh first.” Cass glanced over at me.  
“Not a chance,” I muttered under my breath.  
Rhys stood, waiting for Feyre to tell him that everything was in place.  
“Az, be careful down there. Mor isn’t going to play nice.” Rhys rubbed the back of his neck, showing the first concern that he had during the entire time we’d been planning.  
“I don’t think she’ll play nice but I also know that Myrrh can play dirty.”  
Rhys raised his eyebrows at me.  
“Look Rhys, your father didn’t send her off to an Illyrian training camp with your mother because he felt like she needed training. He needed to get her out of his hair before it caused trouble between the courts.”  
“What are you talking about Az?” said Rhys carefully.  
“She told me what happened before she was sent to the camp and let’s just say that while she may have played it off as no big deal, Lord Beron very much disagreed.”  
Rhys frowned, thinking. “We’ll have to talk about it later. We need to go.”


	24. Shifting Power

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh gets introduced to the Court of Nightmares.

It had been a very long time since I had been anywhere near the Court of Nightmares. The last time I was here, Morrigan picked a fight that she ended up losing. My plan was that she would suffer the same fate today. She had to if I was going to be able to maintain a role within the court and not having to go find a place to hide.   
I followed Feyre to the throne room, forcing myself to stand up tall and take on the same demeanor that I often saw from Az and Cass. I forced my face to become blank and walked along with my head up. I had shadows that were following me although down here they were impossible to see. Mor was waiting near Rhys’ throne and nodded when Feyre and I came in. I expected what happened next but it still threw me and I prayed that it didn’t show on my face.  
The room exploded with muttering and outright exclamations. I heard more than one person mutter my name. Keir had clearly heard rumors as had the people he ruled down here. He looked unsurprised but many in the room looked shocked, as if they couldn’t have believed it without seeing it. I ignored every single person in the room but still assessed every person, as Azriel had taught me. Know your enemy. Feyre and I walked up to the throne. Feyre sat down in the throne to the left of Rhys’ and I stepped to the immediate right of the throne. We waited and I listened to the noise fill the room. Keir watched me carefully and I ignored him as best as I could. Feyre sat, uninterested. I knew that she waiting to feel Rhys, having mentally told him that we were here and ready. And then I felt my brother’s presence as he came into the Court.  
Rhys had never scarred me because I always knew who he was but in that moment, I was in complete awe of the power that my brother wielded. The power he gave off was felt well before he himself arrived. He was preceded by Azriel who stopped near the entrance to the room. Shortly afterward, Cassian entered the room and walked directly up to Rhys’ throne and surveyed the area. He looked directly at Keir who had the presence of mind to look down instead of hold his gaze. I tried not to smile thinking of the Cassian I knew. I total smartass. Down here though, he was the High Lord’s protection, the person who controlled the armies that could crush Keir’s little kingdom. Rhys walked into the room and the entire room, including myself dropped to one knee. I stayed there, waiting for him to start this game.  
He wandered over to his throne and sat down lazily before glancing over at me. I couldn’t see Cass or Az from the way I was waiting but I could feel Azriel scanning the room and keeping an ear on me. The bond between us was almost palpable and yet nobody else in the room seemed to notice it. I suddenly realized that the reason why was the bond between Rhys and Feyre. Their bond was easily overpowering the one between me and Az, which was nice because I felt calmer knowing that Az was keeping a close eye on me.  
“Myrrh, rise,” said Rhys calmly.  
I stood up and looked at my brother, scanning the room as I did. Keir was nearby, watching this closely.  
“My sister,” Rhys announced, “has returned to us. Surely, Keir, you have something to say to her?”  
Keir looked at me and scowled. I didn’t expect him to say anything but then he spoke. “Welcome back to the Court of Nightmares, Princess.”   
There was scorn in his voice. I decided to run with his game. “Why, Keir, I hardly feel as though you need to address me as princess. After all, my brother is High Lord and not a king but perhaps you view him as such?”  
Keir scowled at my reply and I felt Rhys’ pride at my retort. I very carefully allowed myself to yield control of the shadows behind Keir, which he didn’t notice until they were halfway up his legs. He seemed taken aback.  
“Do my shadows frighten you Keir?” I asked innocently. “I thought you enjoyed being amidst them.”  
I had achieved my desired effect and allowed the shadows to stay where they were. I didn’t dare look towards Az but I felt sure that he was proud of my display.  
“Enough playing,” said Rhys abruptly. I promptly made the shadows retreat.  
“Keir, we are here with two purposes and then we can address any concerns you may have,” Rhys began. “One is that we will be having guests soon and I want them accommodated here. You will find the best accommodations we have and make them better. I want everything ready by this time next week.”  
Keir nodded, “Yes, of course.”  
Rhys ignored him and went on. “Obviously, now that my sister has returned to us, she is in need of a position in my Court.” Rhys stared around the room, pausing at Keir lazily before letting his sights land on Morrigan who was now standing just to my right. Carefully, I shifted myself slightly closer to the throne to give me more space.  
“While Morrigan has served me well, I believe that I would prefer my own blood to be closer than yours. Therefore, Myrrh is now my third. You will treat her as such.”  
The gasp that went through the room was audible. I chanced a glance at Mor who looked like she must have been dreaming. As I anticipated, Morrigan turned towards me and she had ice in her eyes. I didn’t flinch. I silently called multiple shadows closer to me. They started to flare around me, much as Azriel could do. The effort involved was minimal but it made me feel safer because I felt as though there was someone at my back.   
“You understand, of course, Morrigan,” said Rhys simply.  
Mor stared at me and I shivered inside. I didn’t like her look and I sincerely hoped that Rhys knew what he was doing. I needed to keep playing along though and I needed to answer him.  
“Thank you, my Lord. I hope to serve you well.”  
“No,” said Mor abruptly.  
Rhys and I both looked at her. Rhys looked composed but I knew that he had been expecting her to push back. He raised an eyebrow at Mor.  
“No,” she repeated. “I fight better than her. I’ll prove it.”  
Rhys looked at me.   
I nodded. “If you wish, Morrigan. But that didn’t end well for you last time” I tried to keep my voice even and strong but I didn’t want to fight my cousin again.  
I glanced quickly at Keir who was grinning. I knew he expected Mor to win this fight. The crowd seemed to be split. I had no indication of my skill as Azriel and Cassian did but they could see the tattoos on my arms and they had no idea that some of them were faked. As far as they could tell, I was trained as an Illyrian fighter.  
Rhys motioned for the crowd to make room. Suddenly I was nervous. I had no idea how any of the people in the crowd may try to interfere. I was used to sparring with Rhys or Cass. Even as I ran for Prythian, I never had to test my skills. The last time that I fought Mor, I was more current with my skills. I had to make this work though.   
I marched down the steps to the floor, looking through the crowd quickly trying to see where Azriel was. I couldn’t see him but I could feel him through our bond, telling me that he had my back. I had no clue how he was going to do that but I put all my faith in him and what all three of them had taught me.  
Mor drew her sword and came at me. I barely had time to pull my own sword and move out of the way. Rhys was looking bored up at his throne. I spun around and got a firm stance on the ground. This time when Myrrh came at me, I parried her blade. We danced around one spot, taking turns at attempting to disarm each other. I knew I needed to keep my blade though because if Mor disarmed me, she wasn’t going to walk away from this. I had to end this and quickly. I concentrated on my task. I was fighting as well as I could but I was starting to realize that Mor may well have been better in an actual fight. She had a great deal of power and it had obviously been honed in the intervening years.  
Suddenly, Mor was surrounded in shadows. I tried not to look surprised and moved with surprising speed. I disarmed her quickly and the shadows retreated. There was a general murmur of foul play but most of the crowd seemed to think that magic was fair play. Mor was not convinced.  
“You didn’t do that,” she shouted at me in anger.  
“Of course I did,” I told her, trying to look disinterested. I knew damn well that Azriel had done that and so did she.  
“Enough,” said Rhys. “Myrrh disarmed you. She proved herself a better fighter. Do you still question that she is worthy to be my third?”  
Mor stared at Rhys like she had no idea who he was.  
“Go to hell,” she told him.  
Cassian looked at Rhys, waiting. Nobody expected her to do that. She had forced Rhys’ hand.  
“Cassian,” he said, “take Morrigan to learn some manners.”   
Cass nodded and grabbed her arm. Someone in the crowd snickered.  
“Who was that?” demanded Rhys.  
A young male was brought forward as people in the crowd moved out of the way. Rhys glanced at Feyre, who suffocated the boy for several moments, before letting him collapse on the ground.  
“Never do anything like that again,” said Rhys viciously. “You will find that I rarely have time for simpering fools such as yourself.”  
The boy didn’t move. Rhys nodded at Cass who dragged Mor with him. She was putting up as good of a fight as she could but Cass was stronger than her.  
I knelt before Rhys again, waiting. He placed his hand on my head.  
“Well done. Now we have guests to prepare for.”  
I nodded and headed out of the room, the crowd parting in front of me as I went. I kept my head held high and walked with a purpose, scanning as I went. Feyre was behind me, I realized after several steps. Rhys seemed to have turned to deal with some business that Keir had for him. We walked briskly down the tunnel to the outside, where the sun was starting to sink below the horizon.  
Feyre winnowed me back to the townhouse. I looked at her when we got back and she looked as surprised as I did. I walked into the house and down the hall to the study. The noise coming out of the room was not surprising.  
“Mor, listen,” roared Cass trying to get her to calm down, “we had to make sure that Keir didn’t question Myrrh at all. Rhys wanted it to look like she was powerful and had his ear.”  
“I don’t care,” came Mor’s reply. “You tell that bastard to get back here and face me.”  
Feyre and I paused outside the study.  
“Do I dare go in there?” I asked her.  
She shrugged.  
I turned around and pushed open the doors and walked into the room, hoping that Cass had at least disarmed her.  
I stood at the door and looked at Mor. She stared back at me with more ice in her eyes than I had even seen.  
“Mor,” I started, “I didn't want to -”  
“Shut your mouth. I have no interest in speaking to you. You are a dirty whore and you don’t even play fair.”  
I stared, with no response. I didn’t have to though.  
“Do not refer to her like that ever again,” came Azriel’s voice. It was quiet and controlled but venomous. The entire room turned to look at Azriel who was standing against a bookcase with his arms crossed and looking like he was actually going to beat Mor to within an inch of her life. I don’t think I had ever seen a look like that on his face.  
“What would you know about it?” she snapped at him.  
Azriel slowly stood up and walked over to where Mor was. There were shadows roiling around him and there was no questions that he was angry. I think that she actually took a step back. The look on her face shifted but the look on Az’s did not.  
“I know her far better than you ever will. Call her a whore again and you’ll find out what I do about it.”  
For once, Mor didn’t speak. She had a talent for opening her mouth when she shouldn't, so I was impressed.  
Azriel turned to me. “That was impressive. The shadows.”  
I stared at him. “I didn’t do that.”  
Az frowned. “Yes, you did.”  
At that moment, I felt my brother’s presence behind me.  
“Everyone needs to sit down.” Rhys wasn’t asking.


	25. Magic of Another Kind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys gets a chance to see the kidnapping of his sister.

I walked into the room and immediately faced Mor. She was going to demand an explanation. Azriel stood in front of her, looking like he might commit murder and Cassian had his hand strategically positioned near his sword. Feyre and Myrrh stood nearby watching the scene. My sister was looking perplexed. 

“Azriel, stand down,” I commanded. “Whatever she said doesn’t matter right now.”

Az did as I told him but I almost heard a faint growl come from his throat as he backed away. If he was warning me or Mor, I couldn’t tell. Possibly both of us. 

“Morrigan, you can stand there or sit.” I waited and after a moment she sat down, arms crossed.

“You’d better have some kind of an explanation, you bastard,” she muttered.

“As it happens I do. You saw for yourself that there were already rumors that Myrrh had been found. Turns out Keir was pretty surprised to discover that fact. So he knows something that he’s not telling. Either way, my sister commands some respect or becomes a target. I chose to make her command respect. What I just did makes it so nobody will question her. At least not without thinking about it more carefully.” I paused and glanced around the room.

“Now,” I turned to my sister, “can you explain what you did down there? Those shadows were pretty impressive.”

Myrrh stared at me. “I didn’t do that.”

I turned and looked over at Azriel. “It wasn’t me, Rhys, I swear.”

I frowned and thought. What I needed was somebody who could do adequate research on all of this. I looked at Cassian. “Find me Lucien.”

Cass nodded and left the room. I looked back at my sister. “Myrrh, what do you think is the most powerful thing that you can do with the shadows?”

“I don’t know. I’ve only ever really played with them. I can move through them, the way Az showed me and I can talk to them.”

“Azriel, what did you teach her?” I asked curiously.

“Just those things. I showed her how to move in and out of the shadows and how to talk to them, kind of get them to do her bidding.”

“Did it seem like she learned those things quickly?”

“Not really. She picked them up as quickly as I did, I guess.”

I sat and thought some more. We knew that Azriel was powerful because of the siphons. Myrrh didn’t need the siphons because like me, she was half High Fae. Magic came naturally to her and she learned to control it the same way she learned to talk. Morrigan was powerful, so powerful that the mountains shook, as the story was told. I had never heard things like that said about Myrrh. But then, considering my own power, clearly, she could have just as much power as I did. 

I wondered aloud, “How could we test that power?”

“What?” Mor finally asked after several moments of silence. 

I turned and looked at my sister. “We need a way to find out just how strong your powers are. It’s entirely possible that you have far more power than you even realize. I was sure that the shadows used against Mor came from you. Azriel confirmed that just now. You don’t think you did anything but is it possible you didn’t even realize you did it?”

Myrrh stared at me for a moment. “Rhys, if that’s true then why didn’t I defend myself when I was kidnapped?”

“I have a theory about that,” I told her. “How much can you let me in? Do you remember things like how you felt, what was said?”

“I guess? I never really thought about it after I was glamoured and I haven’t tried to think about it here.”

I sighed. I didn’t want to do what I was about to ask her to do but I needed to know if I was right and this was the only way that I could find to figure it out.”

“Can I go inside your mind and see it?”

I had never actually asked my sister for that much power. Every time before, I had let her dictate what I saw. Now I was asking her for free reign inside her head. She glanced over at Azriel who nodded. When she looked back at me, I could see the determination in her eyes.

“Whatever we need to do.”

Azriel settled himself next to Myrrh, knowing that she’d feel safer with him next to her. I took a breath and leaned over to her ear, whispering quietly, “Please trust me.”

She nodded and for a moment her green eyes locked with my violet ones. She closed her eyes then and I took a moment to slip inside her head. It took her a moment to step back and let me have control. I could have taken control but I didn’t want to. She needed to be alright with me doing this. I started looking for what I wanted. I could see the glamoured memories. They were foggy and hard to distinguish but I probably could have seen them if I wanted to. Those weren’t what I was after though. I wanted to find the moment before those memories began. And suddenly I found it. A bright spot before all the fogginess that I could easily get into. This was what I wanted to see. I pushed my way in, watching as an outsider would because Myrrh wasn’t in control of this.

It was a still night and the stars were bright in the sky. She had promised our mother that she would meet back up with them soon. Our mother had known… 

I sighed, wondering what else our mother might have known but I tried to focus on watching, observing. Myrrh was obviously headed towards an Illyrian camp. That made sense because she had said that she was going to meet Az. And suddenly there was an odd feeling that overcame her. It was as if her magic had been separated from her and was gone. I puzzled over that for a moment but I wasn’t surprised when she went to land. The feeling was making me sick and it wasn’t even my memory. 

On the ground, Myrrh did what any good Illyrian fighter would have. She looked around for a possible source of the feeling. As she moved around, I could feel waves of nausea. Twice she retched as she moved through the wooded area. She’d have had a hard time flying that sick, so landing made sense. She continued through the trees, feeling worse as she got closer to whatever the source was.

There, between two trees she could see something glowing. That had to be it. The overwhelming urge to run overtook her about five seconds too late. Four men swarmed at her and she felt so sick that she had trouble fighting. It took them less than five minutes to contain her. Then another man walked into the clearing. I recognized the Prince of Hybern and snarled. He held some object, that was clearly magical and also the source of the problem.

“Well, well. An Illyrian or Fae. Maybe both. That makes me think that you belong to the Night Court. I wonder if anyone will miss you.”

The wave of magic that passed over Myrrh was the glamour. I had no idea how the Prince was managing that but it didn’t matter. He had total control over her at that point. 

I pulled myself out of her mind and realized that I had tears on my cheeks. I looked back at Myrrh and realized that she too was crying.


	26. The Fog Begins to Lift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh discovers that allowing Rhysand to see those memories begins to open up some more.

Rhys coming out of my head was overwhelming in more ways than one. First, letting him have that much control was hard. Second, the memories that he had to go through to get there were not pleasant ones. Finally, there was lingering nausea from the memory of having my magic literally ripped from me.

I had no control while Rhys looked through my mind and instead tried to focus on Azriel next to me, holding my hand and trying to be supportive. Unfortunately, as Rhys moved through the memories, I had very real reactions to them. 

After a few minutes, I started to feel more normal. Rhys was sitting on one side and Az sat on the other, as they waited for me to start to feel better.

“Maybe you should go lie down?” Rhys suggested.

“No, I’ll be fine. Did you learn anything?” I asked him, hoping that this hadn’t been futile.

“A lot, actually.”

I looked at him. 

“What you felt was the result of some kind of magical artifact. Given that Hybern had control of all kinds of magical artifacts, I’m not surprised. I am a little interested in how he managed to glamour you with that thing so close by, unless it transferred powers to him by taking them from you.”

“What?” gasped Feyre.

Rhys nodded. “More interestingly is that he didn’t know who you were. Or if he did, he hid it well. Either way, I doubt they knew exactly who you were ever. If they had, Amarantha would have used it at some point to hurt me.”

“Did the glamour hurt her mind at all?” Az asked.

“It doesn’t seem to have. The glamoured memories are foggy, as if they’re harder for her to remember. That may be because she wasn’t really experiencing them as herself.”

“Those memories are clearer now though. The ones from the beginning.”

Rhys turned and stared.

“The man they brought me to was named Andrau Belsar. I lived at his estate under another name, Lorra. That was how the Prince introduced me to him. Andrau had no idea who I was either. He let me wander the estate but I was never allowed to leave. There were others there that I think were glamoured the same way. I don’t know why.”

“Maybe they wanted to use it as a weapon?” Az suggested.

Rhys shrugged. “It’s interesting that the memories are more clear to you now though. Maybe because I was looking through them too? So you re-lived them in a way?”

I didn’t want to think about it anymore. My head was starting to hurt. Rhys seemed to realize that I still didn’t feel well though.

“Azriel, take her to bed. She needs to rest. I put her through a lot.”

Az gently helped me up and started to walk with me to the stairs. “Rhys,” I said suddenly turning, “Thank you.”

My brother looked at me and smiled. “Rest, little sister. We’ll talk tomorrow.”


	27. Preparing a Defense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys sees a new memory from Lucien's point of view and discovers his hunch is probably right.

I had a plan. I had worked on it all night, until Feyre dragged me to bed. First things first and that meant getting Myrrh to get the shields I had helped her build back into place. The power she was demonstrating was obviously manifesting itself without her knowing, which had not happened before. I felt sure that the shields I had taught her to create and use in her mind were a part of that.  
The other thing of importance was making sure that she could fly again, the way she could before. Azriel had done a wonderful job getting her into the air again and everyday she grew stronger but I needed her to be able to defend herself in the air. Cassian would work with her on that and retraining her sword work.

“Have you heard anything from Lucien?” came Azriel’s voice from behind me.

“Not yet. Cass assured me that he would be here this morning.” I turned to look at him. He was alone. “Where’s Myrrh?”

“She’s still asleep,” he said sitting in the chair next to me. “Last night took a lot out of her.”

I raised an eyebrow as I looked at him and he scowled back. I laughed.

“Asshole,” he muttered, picking up an apple.

“Rhys is always an asshole,” came a second familiar voice.

I turned to the doorway to see Lucien standing there, arms crossed.

“You wanted to see me, I’m told.” He walked into the room and sat down in the chair across from Az.

“Yes. It’s about Myrrh.”

Lucien’s face changed. There was obvious concern on it.

“She has been using powers that she seems to be unaware of. In fact, she doesn’t even seem to control those powers. They just maifest. She denies even using power but it does seem to come from her when it happens.”

“Interesting,” murmured Lucien. “Anything else?”

“What do you know about shadowsingers?” I asked him.

He shook his head. “Not much Rhys. Those abilities are rare. Not as rare as your powers but still uncommon enough that there’s very little common knowledge.”

“Is there anywhere that we could get more knowledge?”

Lucien nodded. “I can certainly see if there’s anything in any of the libraries. It’s possible that there are books. I’ve never looked, honestly.”

I dropped my head into my hands and tried to think. My sister was my entire world and I worried about her. I needed to figure this out.

“Please, do,” I finally said to Lucien. “We need to help her learn and control this.”

“Why not have Azriel teach her,” Lucien finally said looking across the table.

“Lucien,” I began slowly, “I think she may be more powerful than he is.”

Lucien’s mouth fell open as he looked at me with disbelief on his face. He paused, clearly thinking.

“Would she be able to get inside someone’s head using shadows?” he finally asked me.

I stared at him.

“What?”

“It’s just, I always wondered if she had some of your powers. Maybe that’s not it though. Maybe she can use the shadows to project images?”

Az had set his apple down and was staring at Lucien. “How did you know about Cass?”

“Cassian? What does he have to do with it?”

“Lucien, what are you talking about?” I asked him slowly.

“That day, I always wondered how she did that. Eris was terrified for a good week.”

I stared at him. “Eris? You mean the day she talked about that got her kicked out of Autumn Court?”

Lucien nodded.

“Were you there?” I asked him slowly.

“I was. It was… well, it was a little scary, honestly.”

“Can you let me see that moment?” I asked him. “Let me inside your head and actually see it?”

Lusien frowned. He wasn’t a big fan of me but he did trust me, especially after Feyre. He knew that I wanted to help. Finally, Lucien nodded.

“How does that work?” he asked me.

“You think of the memory and let me know when you’re ready. You then just recall it and it’s like I can watch it through your eyes.”

He took a breath and thought for a moment. “Rhys, you aren’t doing anything else, right?”

“I promise.”

“Alright,” he said quietly. “I’m ready.”

I slipped into Lucien’s mind and found myself in the woods outside of the Court’s manor house. These woods were beautiful. Myrrh sat on a swing and it seemed Lucien was leaning against a tree.

“I hate him,” she spat out.

“Who? Your father?”

“Him too,” she muttered.

“Look, Eris won’t want to marry you, I swear. He wants pure High Fae.”

There were shadows curling around a tree nearby.

“I wonder if I could scare him enough that he wouldn’t stay in the room with me.”

“How?” Lucien asked curiously.

“You know, play with the shadows a little. They can be scary.”

Lucien laughed. “That sounds like fun, actually.”

Myrrh grinned at him. I knew that grin. It was mischief, of the kind only she could create.

“Come with me,” Lucien said. 

The two made their way into the house with various servants bowing as the two walked through. They both ignored the servants and their bows as they headed through a maze of hallways. 

Lucien stopped and I could hear voices coming from a room up ahead. One of them was clearly my father’s voice and the other I recognized as the voice of Lord Beron. The third was likely Eris.

“Still in there,” whispered Lucien.

Myrrh nodded. She glanced around, looking for some shadows to use, finding some on the floor where the sun was coming in the window. They swirled around her for a moment before vanishing again. 

“What in the world?” I whispered.

It was several moments later when I heard Eris scream. It was a pretty horrible sound because it sound as if the life was being taken from him. Lucien and Myrrh were quiet. Myrrh was focused on the shadows nearby and Lucien just seemed to be listening. Suddenly Myrrh stood up and frowned. Eris was still screaming. Lucien looked at her.

“Why isn’t he stopping?” he asked her.

She shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m trying to get them back but they’re like acting on their own now.”

I heard the men standing up inside and my father came outside faster than I would have thought possible. 

“What are you doing?” he snarled at the two Fae standing there.

Suddenly Eris stopped screaming. 

“We aren’t doing anything,” replied Lucien as evenly as he could. “We just happened to walk by and were wondering what was going on.”

My father obviously did not believe that and neither did Lord Beron. He smacked Lucien in the head.

“Get out boy!” Lucien scurried off.

My father meanwhile grabbed Myrrh by the arm. From the end of the hallway, I watched him drag her down the stairs. He had probably whipped her for what had just happened.

I pulled myself out of Lucien’s mind and looked at Azriel. “We need to figure out what she can do, Az.”


	28. Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel's worrying brings him back to an early memory.

I had known Rhysand for a very long time. I considered us to be close. I had never heard him sound quite so afraid as he did at that moment. 

“What do you mean?” I asked him with concern.

“Az, I don’t know what happened with Eris but whatever it was, she lost control of it or had no real control to start with. And whatever she did, it was a pretty bad thing. He sounded terrified and I don’t think that I’ve ever heard of him being that afraid of anything.”

“No, he never was,” said Lucien. “After that, he was actually afraid of the dark for awhile. He seemed to be worried that there was something there he couldn’t see. Of course, we were never close, so I can’t tell you what he was afraid of.”

Rhys looked like he was trying to think. “Lucien, we need to find out as much as we can about shadowsinger powers. There has to be a record somewhere of recorded powers. Please see what you can find.”

“Is this what Amren meant when she said that Myrrh could challenge my power?” I asked Rhys nervously.

“Maybe? Amren seemed to think that Myrrh was powerful. Now we’re seeing her do things that we’ve never seen anyone do. There has to be an explanation and I intend to find it. We need to know what she can do if we’re going to help her control it.”

Lucien stood up. “I’m going to go start digging and see what I can find. I have some places to start looking.”

Rhys nodded and Lucien left. I had no idea where he might be going. After a moment, Rhys stood and walked out of the room. He was distracted. He was probably worried about her. Mother above knew I was. I stared blankly, letting my mind wander. Myrrh was incredibly important to me. She was my mate, yes, but before I had figured that out, realized what the odd feeling was that I got every time I was around her, I had fallen in love with her.

I closed my mind and let myself go back in my memories. There were so many good ones. 

There was the first day though. Not the first day I met her but the first day that I realized how alike we were. That day had been a long day training at camp and had been a very bad day for me. I had a lot of Illyrians at camp that hadn't liked me at all. In truth, I had not liked them either. Most of them thought they were better than me because they weren’t bastards. 

I had often wondered if some of them were jealous because of the power and skill I had. In truth, most of my free time went to practice because I had little else to do. Then I met Cass and Rhys. Well, actually I got taken in by Rhys’ mother. At first, I had paid little attention to Rhys’ little sister. Sometimes she was there and other times she wasn’t. She didn’t seem to do much when she was there. She watched a lot.

Then, one day, when she was fifteen, she showed up at camp and announced that she was staying. Something unexpected had happened at Autumn Court and her father had sent her to be out of his way. She was there for several years with us. She was eighteen on this particular night. I had just turned twenty-one. 

When I say that Myrrh watched, I mean exactly that. She watched us closely and learned. I assume she practiced alone while we were training. This night was chilly but she was still outside after dinner. The sun was about to set and she seemed to be concentrating on something. A shadow, I realized after a moment. She was manipulating the shadow, trying to get it to do her bidding.

After several moments, she relaxed. 

“That was pretty good,” I said quietly.

She jumped up, turning to face me. “I was just practicing.”

“Well, you do pretty well for someone who claims to just be practicing. That shadow looked like it was yours.”

She watched me, hesitantly and said nothing.

“I’m sorry. I’ll go if you want.” I turned to go back inside.

“Azriel, wait. It’s fine.”

“So you do know my name,” I teased her.

She blushed. “Of course I do.”

“Well why don’t you ever talk to me? I mean, we share powers. I could probably teach you some things.”

“I just… don’t talk to people. I don’t have many friends. I don’t trust people, generally.”

“Yeah, me either.” I sat down on the stair but she stayed where she was. 

“I would have thought that you’d have lots of friends,” I continued. “I mean, the daughter of the High Lord. All the parties and events that you go to. Don’t you meet people?”

“Oh, I meet plenty of people,” she said quietly, “but none of them really like me. I am not accepted by most High Fae because I’m not High Fae.”

“Of course you are,” I told her scoffing.

“No. I’m not. Like Rhys, I’m only half. And most of Prythian reminds me of it every chance they get. In fact, aside from Rhys and my mother, I don’t have more than a couple of friends. And I’m not Illyrian either, so I don’t fit in here. I just don’t belong anywhere and nobody wants to spend time with me because I’m different.”

“Rhys doesn’t seem to have that problem,” I pointed out.

“Of course not. He’s going to be High Lord of Night Court some day. Even if others didn’t want him around, they’d never tell him that to his face. I am nobody and will inherit nothing. If I’m lucky, my father tells me, some High Fae will marry me and I’ll spend the rest of my life surrounded by people who don’t like me.”

“I understand. Probably better than you think. Rhys and Cass are the only friends I have Myrrh. The others don’t like me. My family doesn’t want me either.” I told her bitterly. 

“I’m sorry. At least I have Rhysand. He gets me. My mother tries too. My father… well, he sent me here so that gives you an idea." She paused. "Maybe we can be friends.”

I looked up at her and smiled. “That’d be nice. But more importantly, maybe we should go inside before we freeze out here.”

She giggled and walked over to me. “You’ll have to move first.”

I laughed as I stood up and gave her a mock bow to tease her. “After you, my lady.” As I stood back up, our eyes met for a moment and that same odd feeling passed over me. Without thinking, I took her hand and kissed it quickly, then let it go. 

Myrrh stood there for a moment looking at me, still red and scurried inside, as if she was afraid. I wasn’t sure what I had just done. 

I smiled thinking back on that moment, realizing how she must have felt when I did that. Certainly, she was young then. We both were. But she was more sheltered than I had been and far more inexperienced about everything. So while I had chased girls and had learned quite a few things, I knew that she hadn’t. My simple kiss on her hand must have perplexed her. Plus there was our mating bond, which had started to become more obvious as we both got older. I was certain now that it is unusual to find a mate when you were that young. I had no idea then and at that point didn’t even know what I had been feeling.

As a result, we had gotten to know each other slowly. Ultimately, we had fallen in love before we truly understood what was between us. That love had sustained itself across hundreds of years of separation because now more than ever, I was sure that Myrrh was the only other person I wanted to be with.


	29. Trust and Hatred

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassian tries to fix the relationship between Rhys and Mor but it ends even worse.

Mor was as upset as I had thought she would be. I was really worried that this was going to be something that destroyed us as a family. Rhys tended to play dangerous and it always concerned me. This time he may have gone too far. Right now, I was desperately trying to keep Mor from tracking down Rhys herself and trying to kill him. She couldn’t but I didn’t want anybody to get hurt in the process.

It had been difficult to get Mor to come back to the townhouse and talk but it had to happen. I just wanted for it to be civilized. But of course not.

Myrrh walked into the room and Mor immediately began yelling at her. “This was your idea wasn’t it?”

Myrrh looked surprised and shook her head. “No, this was all Rhys. He came up with the idea.”

I was surprised at how calm Myrrh sounded. The past several times when she and Morrigan had been in the same room, bad things had happened. Azriel had told me once that Myrrh seemed to have a lot of control over her power but since she’d been back it seemed she was very out of practice. Either that, or Rhys' theory was correct.

“We needed to make sure Keir didn’t question anything. My brother makes his own decisions or did you not notice that?.”

“I don’t care,” Mor yelled back, still just as angry. “He should have never done that without talking to me first. You can’t even understand what it’s been like here all this time and now you walk back in and he makes you his third and knows nothing about who you are or where you’ve been or where your damn loyalties even lie.”

With that, Mor took two steps and started swinging. Fortunately, Myrrh was good at dodging, so Mor missed. I looked at Myrrh and she shook her head at me. She wanted to handle this on her own.  
“What exactly do you mean, where my loyalties lie?” she hissed.

I wasn’t sure but I thought I saw shadows flare behind her.  
“Just what I said,” Mor replied. The venom in her voice told me that she truly didn’t trust Myrrh at all. That seemed to strike Myrrh hard because her demeanor changed.  
“If you think for one second that I would ever do anything to put this court in danger, think that my loyalty was ever to anyone but Rhys then you need to take a closer look at who you’re talking too,”   
In that instant, I was reminded of that fact that Rhys and Myrrh were siblings. Her demeanor in this moment was identical to her brother. He didn’t like to be challenged either and had a temper that could flare when provoked.

“What proof is there of that?” Mor taunted back.  
“I spoke a promise to my brother to be loyal to him and I would never consider breaking that. I would die first,” said Myrrh. As she spoke she pointed to a tattoo on her right arm. It was hard to discern the pattern through the shadows that were now surrounding her but it was obvious that there were three stars there, Rhys’s mark.  
“Oh we’ll take care of traitors in our own way,” Mor hissed.  
With that, Myrrh’s shadows swirled into a rage around her and for a second I thought I saw Mor back down. I took a couple of steps back myself because I wasn’t sure what those shadows were about to do. The shadows were the least of Mor’s problems though because Myrrh had apparently grasped Mor’s mind with whatever power she had and Mor fell to the ground in pain.  
I wasn’t sure what to do next. The shadows were making it hard for me to see Myrrh well enough to grab her but even if I did, there was little I could do about her grasp on Mor’s brain. I was hoping that Rhys and Az were on their way downstairs because this situation was beyond my control. Fortunately it wasn’t beyond Feyre’s.   
I hadn’t even seen Feyre come in but she had assessed the situation quickly and managed to separate Myrrh’s hold on Mor. Mor collapsed and I went over to check on her. Feyre could handle Myrrh.  
She didn’t need to though.  
“Enough!” roared Rhys, entering the room.  
Az was immediately next to Myrrh, trying to get her to control the shadows, using his own to try and get control over the situation.  
Mor had sat up and was rubbing her head. She was also sobbing, with her face buried in my chest. Rhys walked over to Mor and seemed to soothe whatever Myrrh had done, so that Mor managed to stop crying and with my help get to her feet.  
At the same time, Azriel had managed to get Myrrh to reign in her shadows.  
“What happened?” asked Az to the room. He was still staring at Myrrh, trying to keep her calm.  
“She tried to kill me,” Mor accused loudly.  
Myrrh snarled. “She accused me of being a traitor.”  
Rhys looked at Mor. “You did?”  
Mor nodded. “You know nothing of her Rhys. She’s been gone for three centuries and you believe this story that she was trapped by a glamour?”  
“Yes,” Rhys said simply. “You forget, Morrigan, that I have powers that allow me to see the truth of what others say. And my sister swore herself to me. I don’t care how many centuries have passed. If she broke that promise, I would know.”  
“I would never,” Myrrh snarled.  
Rhys turned and looked at her. “I know.”  
Rhys’ affirmation seemed to do more to calm her than anything, as though she needed to know that her brother didn’t view her as a threat to the court.  
“Az,” Rhys said quietly, “take her somewhere to calm down.”  
Azriel nodded and leaned in close to Myrrh, whispering something to her.  
Finally she nodded and let Az lead her out of the room.  
Rhys looked back at Feyre. “Are you ok?”  
Feyre nodded. “I’m fine. How’s Mor?”  
“Fine,” replied Rhys.   
I stared at him.  
“I’m serious Cass. She hurt her, yes, but there’s no damage. It’s as if whatever she’s doing is...”  
I shook my head as Mor stood up. She was shaky but on her feet.  
“How does she know that?” Mor asked Rhys.  
“Know what?” asked Rhys curiously.  
“It was like being surrounded by shadows but only inside my head and I kept hearing that I would die when I was 953. The number was precise. Then she asked me if I wanted to see how.”  
“She asked?” Feyre frowned.  
“Well… someone asked. It was very strange and it was terrifying. It was like judgement. I kept thinking about things that I’ve done to other people that I should apologize for.”  
Rhysand started pacing the room. “I don’t understand what’s going on here but it fits with what Lucien said happened to Eris so how is she doing it?”  
“There was something odd about it though Rhys,” I said slowly, thinking back. “Just before it happened, shadows flared and I thought it was her anger at first but what if it’s not? What if it’s something else happening?”  
“Like what Cass?” Rhys asked.  
I shrugged. This wasn’t my area of expertise. Hopefully whatever Lucien came back with would help us make sense of this.  
Morrigan stood up from the chair she had been sitting in. She faced Rhys and had a look of terror on her face.   
“I don’t know what kind of an aberration your sister is but I am not coming back into this house until you take care of it.”  
She walked out of the room calmly but slammed the front door behind her.


	30. Shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhysand considers how he can best protect his sister and his home.

The words Mor spoke shook me to the core. I flinched as the door slammed.   
“Don’t say a word,” I said to Cassian.  
“I didn’t,” he replied.  
“Just don’t,” I said again and walked out of the room.   
I scanned the house, trying to figure out where Az had taken Myrrh. I finally realized that they were up in the library. It was a good choice on Azriel’s part. It was a soothing place for my sister. I walked down the hallway and hesitated outside the door before going in.  
Myrrh was in a chair and Az was kneeling in front of her. He held her hands in his. I almost wished I hadn’t walked in on this scene. It looked intimate except that Myrrh had no expression on her face.  
“It’s ok,” Az said to her. “Mor is ok. Rhys isn’t mad at you. Just talk to me.”  
Myrrh shook her head. I couldn’t see her face well because her hair had fallen across her face but what I could see looked like exhaustion.  
“Myrrh,” I whispered. “Can I talk to you?”  
Az turned to look at me. His face was full of concern.  
“What did she do?” he asked me.  
“I’m not sure. She didn’t do any damage though. Mor was more frightened than hurt.”  
“It was so dark in my head,” she whispered.  
I nodded. “I know. It’s ok though. You didn’t hurt her.”  
“I did. She thought that I was going to kill her.”  
“No,” Rhys said, “but something strange happened. How could you know when Morrigan would die. Why would you name an age like that?”  
My sister turned back to Azriel looking confused. My sister fell out of the chair she was in, into Azriel’s arms and I watched helplessly as he held her and gently stroked her hair. I didn’t speak. I backed slowly out of the room, leaving Azriel to comfort his mate. If anybody could bring her back from this brink of insanity, it was him. It was most definitely not me.  
I walked down the hall to where I knew Feyre would be waiting. She was worried. I could feel the emotion coursing through our bond as my own mate tried to wait for me to come back to her. I made it to the door of our bedroom and then collapsed onto the ground sobbing.  
Feyre came out to me and wrapped her arms around me. For a moment, I had a fleeting thought that my sister and I were both completely broken and the only people who could help us were our mates.   
“What do I do?” I asked Feyre.  
She just held me. We sat there for a long time before we got up and Feyre managed to get me into bed. The last thing I remember was the thought that hopefully all of this was not for nothing.

When I woke up the next morning, it was with a sense of vague foreboding. I stayed under the covers next to Feyre, hoping that whatever I was feeling was just because of yesterday. I finally decided to get up and left Feyre sleeping. I went down to the kitchen looking for something to help ease my stomach. I had just picked up an apple when I heard voices. They weren’t loud but they were two familiar ones - Cass and Az. Neither one sounded happy. One look at their faces confirmed that.

“What’s wrong? Is Myrrh ok?”

“She’s alright Rhys,” said Az calmly. 

“We have a different, although possibly related problem,” Cass started. “Az said that several of his spies came back and let us know that there is a contingent of Fae moving from Summer Court north. Except they don’t appear to be from Prythian.”

“And they have this,” said Az, handing me a paper. On it was a picture of a woman who could resemble my sister under different circumstances. It said her name was Lorra and that they were offering a reward for her return.

“Cass, what the hell does she know?” I asked him, not expecting an answer. But I got one.

“Maybe you should find out.”

Az looked back at Cass and shook his head. “Not the way you’re thinking. That’ll take way too much out of her.”

I frowned. I read the rest of the paper. Belsar. That name sounded vaguely familiar to me but I couldn’t place why. Clearly, these fae came from Hybern’s kingdom. And they were looking for my sister. 

“Maybe we can use her as a spy,” said Cass slowly.

Az and I both turned to look at him. The look on both of our faces gave him his answer. That was not an option.

“My sister is not a spy nor is she a pawn in some game Cassian. I won’t put her at risk and I won’t put us in a position where we need to go and fight on territory we don’t know. If they take her back to Scythia, what then? We sure as hell aren’t leaving her there.”

“Maybe we can take them in for a time? Get to know them. Offer a hand of peace?”

“They want my sister. I doubt they’ll see us holding her here as a peace symbol.”

“It could look like we were protecting her. She didn’t know where she came from.”

“Cassian, they’ll take one look at us and know that’s a lie. We are Illyrian, remember. We have wings too. She accidentally stumbled upon a group of fae that looks just like her? Not likely.”

“Wait,” Cass began slowly, “hear me out. This could work. They are looking for Lorra, whoever that is. We know that Myrrh was under a glamour and Belsar probably does as well. So what if we create a story. We can be slaves to the High Fae. You can hide your wings and they’ll never know.”

“How do we explain Myrrh and Rhys looking alike?” asked Az.

“What, their fae don’t have affairs?” asked Cass slyly. 

I frowned. “Cass, what if they think she’s theirs then? I mean, how important can a slave be?”

“I’m working on that one. There’s got to be a way to figure this out. Look, Rhys, I swear, I won’t let anything happen to her. They won’t take her back under my watch. You’re the only family I have and as such, so is Myrrh.”

Azriel rubbed his face. For him, that was a large display of frustration. This was a lot for him and I knew that he was having a hard time dealing with everything. I knew that feeling of frustration, fright, and anxiety from Under the Mountain. 

“Right now,” I finally said, “my priorities are to protect Myrrh and to protect Velaris and Prythian. We can’t allow them to take control like before. And I wish that Lucien would hurry up and get back here.”

“Where did Lucien go?” came my sister’s quiet voice.


	31. The Benefits of Not Knowing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassian asks Azriel about how he failed to notice a love affair under his nose.

I picked my jaw up off the ground as I turned to see Myrrh standing there.

Rhys looked at her, a slight look of surprise on his face but Az didn’t seem surprised.

“Where did you come from?” asked Rhys.

“Um, upstairs. Where do you think?”

Az chuckled as he stood there. “She might make a better spy than me.”

“Seriously.” I replied under my breath. Az hit me. “What was that for?”

“And I’ve already told you that is off the table.” said Rhys.

“I get that but it’s hard to see that skill set and not want to use it. What did you teach her Az?” I asked him. It was more out of curiosity.

“I spent years at camp watching you. All three of you. You think I didn’t learn things?”

I hesitated. She was right. I had never considered all the hours that she had watched us spar or discuss things that we had been learning and while she never asked questions, I should have known that she was perceptive enough to start figuring things out. Plus there were all the hours that she spent without us doing Cauldron knows what. Rhys and Az and I were sometimes gone for 14 hours at a time. Myrrh had to be doing something and knowing their mother, she was probably learning to spar. 

“I did teach her some things,” Az finally said. “When I realized that she’d been watching us and trying to learn on her own, I just started teaching her. Especially since we have the same power. I thought it would be useful.”

“You mean at the training camp?” Rhys asked after a moment.

Az nodded. 

“I had no idea that you had noticed her being there, I guess. You never even looked at her.”

Azriel shrugged. “I think I was trying to avoid her a lot because of the feelings I’d get. I had no idea what they were at first. I wanted to be around her, I guess instinctively but I consciously wanted to avoid her.”

I chuckled. “And the result was that you acted like she didn’t exist? Real smooth Az.”

“Well, I was trying to avoid him too,” Myrrh said after a moment. “At least until after the Blood RItes. Then I don’t think I could have avoided him if I wanted to.”

There was a silence in the room. Then Rhys asked the question that he’s probably been wanting to ask for awhile. “How long were you two together, exactly?”

Az paused for a moment and looked at Rhys. “Promise you aren’t going to hit me again?” he asked.

Rhys nodded.

Az absently rubbed his jaw before he looked at me. “I don’t have an exact number of years because there was a long time where we knew what we were to each other but didn’t say anything. Almost hundred years, maybe? We were pretty young when we met and it took us a long time to work out what was happening.”  
I glanced at Rhys who was staring at the table in front of him before looking back at me.

“Why didn’t you at least tell me?” Rhys asked.

“At first, because we didn’t tell anyone.” Az started, “We snuck around, met at night. But then, I just –“

“Couldn’t tell me,” Rhys finished for her.

Az nodded. “And if I couldn’t tell you,” he said to Rhys, “then how could I tell you, Cass?”

Azriel looked at Rhys. He seemed to be waiting for him to say something.  
“I can see where he might have thought that I wouldn’t be so receptive to the idea,” said Rhys finally. “I would hope I’ve changed a lot since then though.”

Az absently rubbed his jaw again. There was still a shadow of a bruise on it and I laughed.

“Well, I try,” Rhys said looking at me with exasperation.

“When you say the Blood Rites,” I started slowly, “do you mean, ours?”

Myrrh nodded. I was shocked. I looked at Rhys and he looked surprised by that too.

“How?” Rhys finally asked.

“How what?” Myrrh replied looking at her brother baffled. 

“How did you manage to fall in love and have nobody notice?”

Az and Myrrh looked at each other with faint smiles on their faces. It was as if they had talked about this very thing before.

Az spoke first. “Well, when you’re essentially invisible, lots of people overlook you. And I’m not trying to say that you don’t see me, Rhys, but you - both of you - were occupied with other things.”

“Most people never take any notice of me and if they do it’s to scoff. Generally though, nobody ever paid attention to what I was doing as long as it didn’t cause problems. You’d be surprised what you can do when nobody ever notices you.” Myrrh looked at Rhys with a vaguely sad look on her face.

“The only people that ever noticed me,” continued Az, “were you two and your father when he needed me to do something. And he never considered me to be a threat to Myrrh. A threat to his throne, yes, which is why we were never allowed together. He never considered that Myrrh and I might have any interest in each other. We encouraged that belief by ignoring each other when we were in the same room.”

Myrrh looked at me. “You were both busy and rarely here. While we were at camp, we were friends and that was it. We grew closer as time passed but nothing happened until after we were both back here. So you would never have noticed anything, really.”

Az smiled as he went on. “And then at Starfall, well, that’s when things really changed but like Myrrh said, neither of you was really ever here. So the only two people who might have noticed weren’t around. We were very careful when we were in the same room together or around each other and there were people present. We both knew that your father wouldn’t like what was happening, so we kept it hidden.” 

“Mostly, we spent time together at night or we’d vanish for awhile and we had secret places that we knew we could go to and not be found. But we were always cautious about when and where we would meet. We never got caught and I used Lucien a lot to help get some extra time.” Myrrh laughed.

“Lucien?” Rhys questioned. He looked baffled.

“Sure,” Myrrh said with a grin. “Our father was sure that I was hoping to be married to Lucien. He made Az our chaperone, thinking that would keep me from getting into trouble. He had no idea he was letting me get into trouble.”

Rhys laughed. “So, Lucien knew about you two being together?”

Az nodded. “Of course. We used him as a cover. It worked both ways. He would use Myrrh as a cover to spend time with Jess too. At least until his brothers found out. Then we had to be super careful because everyone was suspicious. There was a period of time, almost a year where we only got to spend time together a couple of times.”

“Unbelievable,” murmured Rhys under his breath. “I feel like there’s more to this story. I think I’d be curious to hear about Starfall.”

“You would,” teased Myrrh, “because you nearly caught us.”


	32. Once Upon a Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh tells Rhys a brief story about her and Azriel's first kiss.
> 
> There's actually an entire "chapter" that I wrote about this. Myrrh's memory here is brief but if you'd like to read the entire story of that night, I can certainly post that at some point.

Rhys looked at me baffled. “I did?”

Az gave a chuckle. “Yes, you did.”

I looked at Rhys and smiled. “You remember my grand entrance, I suppose? My blue dress. I loved that dress. It sparkled like the stars in the night sky. I think I spent weeks trying to pick a dress. But I got to the top of the stairs and all three of you were there at the bottom, waiting.

“This I remember,” Cass said quietly. 

“I was so relieved that all three of you had made it back safe. But it was also the Blood RItes that made me see how important Az was to me. The thought of losing him had me in tears. I was worried about you too Rhys, and everyone thought that was why I was crying all the time.”

“Nice to know you cared,” said Rhys sarcastically.

“I think I knew that you would be ok. The thought of losing Azriel though. Rhys, it tore me apart. At that point, I realized that I was in love with him. At any rate, that night was the first time I had seen all of you.”

Rhys laughed. “And here I thought that smile on your face was for me.”

“Well, it was,” I said. “Like I said, I was happy to see all three of you.”

“I will never forget that dress,” Az whispered under his breath. “With your hair up like that.”

Rhys glanced over at Az. “I would be careful what you say.”

“Anyway,” I continued, “that night, Az found me after I had danced with just about everyone there.”

“I figured once you had danced with Cassian nobody would notice if I did.”

“But instead of asking me to dance, he asked me if I wanted to take a walk outside. We walked through the garden for quite some time. You found us on the far side, sitting on the bench near the large tree.”

Rhys nodded at me. “You told me that Azriel had been assigned as your guard when he wasn’t busy with other duties.”

“That was true,” Az added. “Your father spoke to me that morning and said that he wanted me at court with him and that part of my job was to protect Myrrh. He had no idea how happy that made me.”

“And that night, Rhys, right before you found us was the first time that we kissed one another. I was actually pretty mad with you in that moment,” I finished.

“Why was she suddenly needing guards?” asked Cass.

“That’s a good question,” said Rhys after a moment. 

“Well, your father said that he had been informed of a threat. I don’t know if that came from Tamlin’s father or somewhere else but he was actually very concerned. Or that’s how he presented and I never saw anything to indicate otherwise. He told me that if I was leaving to go to another court, I was to go with her.” Az frowned. “That actually changed right before he sent me to that camp. I never understood why.”

Rhys frowned. “So there was a credible enough threat to make him think he needed to guard his daughter but then he stopped that and that’s when she was actually taken?”

“Maybe that threat was real and Az did that good of a job,” pointed out Cass.

“Or he figured out that something was going on between you two,” said Rhys with some finality. “That might be more likely.”

Az stared at Rhys for a moment. “You honestly think that we ever did anything where another person could see or hear us? Rhys, when we were at court we hardly even looked at each other. An outside observer wouldn’t have noticed anything.”

“My father was not easy to deal with though. He could have seen something completely unrelated. Or maybe he was more worried about the safety of Prythian.” Rhys shook his head. “Did he say anything to you?”

“The last thing he told me was that I needed to go to Spring Court. He made it clear to me that Tamlin wanted to meet me.”

“Had you never met him before?” asked Rhys curiously.

“No,” I shook my head. “I had only been in Spring for Calanmai and that had only been twice. It’s not like I spent a lot of time at other courts though. The only places he let me go were places where other lords wanted to court me. That was why I went to Autumn so often. There were a lot of sons in that court.”

“But after Eris - ,” began Cassian.

“Exactly,” I told him. “None of the males of that court had any interest after that. My father had little interest in finding me a mate from Dawn or Day Court. He seemed focused on the four courts further south.”

“It would have been a better alliance,” sighed Rhys. “I knew he wanted an alliance with one of those courts. I don’t think I realized that you were the bargaining chip though. But Tamlin?”

“He was one of the only eligible males left. Autumn Court wasn’t an option anymore. Summer Court was never interested. He tried Winter but most of the males of Winter Court were much older than me. I think he knew that he was going to have to find someone I could relate to on some level. Especially after Eris.” I shrugged. “I didn’t really want to go but I couldn’t say no.”

Rhysand began pacing the room and I could tell that he was thinking. He looked at Azriel several times but never said a word. It was unfortunate timing that Nuala appeared at the door just then.


	33. The Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel gets some unexpected news which leads Cassian and Rhys to come up with a plan.

I had been watching Rhys for several minutes, waiting for him to say something when I saw Nuala appear. She seemed worried and came directly to me. I held my breath, instinctively knowing this could not be good.

“They know who she is now,” she whispered in my ear. “Autumn Court.”

With that Nuala vanished. Fear coursed through me. Even without a mating bond, I loved Myrrh and wanted to protect her but with that bond those instincts were amplified. There were several times I had wanted to murder Lucien and I knew that he had no interest in Myrrh. I had to get the fear under control but it was hard. Everyone in the room was looking at me and Myrrh had stepped closer to me, likely hoping that her presence would help. And it did. I could smell the jasmine and orange that was her and managed to take several deep breaths.

“Lord Beron,” I finally managed, “has apparently helpfully explained who Myrrh is to this group.”

“Are they coming here?” asked Cassian with concern.

I shook my head. “Nuala didn’t say but I would imagine so.”

Rhys actually snarled and for a brief moment, I felt the room shake. The High Lord of the Night Court was a good person and I loved him as my brother but he also had a temper and was incredibly powerful. I looked at him for a moment and was actually frightened. I glanced at Cass who also had worry on his face. After a moment, Rhys seemed to reign in his anger. 

It was unfortunate that someone knocked on the door at that moment.

I summoned Nuala because we needed someone to be reasonable. We waited, listening to the person at the door. The conversation was quiet but Nuala returned a moment later, holding some flowers. Myrrh grabbed my arm and stared at them.

“What is that?” asked Cassian, staring.

“Those flowers grow only in one place that I’ve ever seen,” Myrrh said. 

I glanced back at her and the protectiveness that I felt for her amplified. She looked terrified. 

“Where?” asked Rhys. 

“A garden in a manor house near where Hybern’s castle was. Belsar.” Myrrh’s voice dropped to a whisper.

“Who is there, Nuala?” I asked quickly.

“A messenger, who asks to speak to the High Lord. There is only him, no others.”

I sent shadows out rapidly. I scanned the entire area, looking for any sign of others. I found several other men at various places nearby. Either Beron had warned them or they were not stupid. Possibly both.

“There are at least five others with him nearby,”I told Rhys.

Rhys turned to me. “Take her upstairs to Feyre. Stay there with them until I tell you otherwise.”

Without a question, I took Myrrh upstairs to Rhys’ room. I quickly explained to Feyre what was happening and to her credit she didn’t flinch. She, like me, trusted that Rhys could handle this. I still wanted to know what was going on though, so I slid some shadows down the stairs to watch and listen.

“Greeting, Lord Rhysand,” came an unfamiliar voice. “I am an emissary from Lord Belsar of Scythia. He has recently obtained the throne left behind by the late King Hybern. He has been looking for an escaped lover. He greatly misses her and was told that you may know of her whereabouts.”

“His missing lovers are not my concern,” Rhys replied with disinterest.

“Well, Lord, we have been told that she is here and Lord Belsar greatly desires her return.”

“Why? She ran away. I’m sure that he could find other fae to take her place.”

“Perhaps. This one is special to him though. He cares for her greatly and is worried that she may be harmed.”

“I’ve not seen her,” came Rhys’ cool voice. “I will certainly keep an eye open and if I see her, I will let him know. I presume that he is in Scythia.?”

“Lord Belsar has come to Prythian to look for her himself, my Lord. Perhaps, you could allow him a visit so that he may speak to you himself?”

“I don’t have time for these silly games but I suppose if he truly insists, then I could find time. Tonight is fine, if he can make it. Otherwise, I’m afraid it’s not an option.”

I hadn’t realized that I was holding my breath but I suddenly drew a deep breath. What was Rhys doing?

Thirty seconds later, Cassian was at the door. “All three of you, come on. We need to get this plan in motion.”

“Feyre, love,” said Rhys as she came downstairs. “We are having guests for dinner. Please make sure that a banquet is ready.”

Feyre shrugged but she watched him for a moment before realizing that he was not panicking. He seemed to have a plan. He turned to me.

“I need you there but we also need Myrrh safe. Where can she go? Dawn, perhaps?”

It occurred to me what Rhys was asking. He wanted me to hide her. 

“I would feel better if she was further away but I don’t think that there’s a better option. I trust Thesan. His court is safe.”

“Good. I need to get as many allies here as possible. If Thesan can come tonight, that would be the best option. Cassian, I am trusting you to take Myrrh to Thesan and get him here tonight. Explain the situation.”

Cass nodded and glanced at me. 

“No,” Rhys said quickly. “I have something I need Az to do.”

I swallowed down as much emotion as I could. I trusted Cassian. He would ensure that Myrrh was safe. She hadn’t left my side and I could feel the worry and fear around her. I pulled her into my arms.

“You trust Cass, right?” I whispered.

I felt her nod her head.

“I trust him too. And Thesan’s court is safe. Rhys wouldn’t send you there if he thought otherwise.”

“I don’t want Belsar here,” she murmured, “after everything that he did to me.”

“What did he do?” I felt my voice rise and Rhys turned to look at us.

Myrrh shook her head. “I should pack some things.” She turned and ran up the stairs. Rage coursed through me and I felt anger, imagining what she could mean. My thoughts ran back over the conversation. That messenger had referred to her as his lover…

Rhys seemed to recognize where my thoughts were going a moment before I moved. I have no idea how he moved over to where I was to grab me but both he and Cassian were there. The rage inside of me grew and was coming out in angry waves of darkness.

“I am going to kill him, Rhysand,” I snarled.

“Azriel, I need you to control yourself.” Rhys spoke sternly, like the High Lord he was. “You are my spymaster and I need you to act that way.

“He -” I started angrily.

“Yes, I know,” said Rhys, “but right now, we need to focus on a task. That task is keeping her safe here and ensuring Prythian is not in danger. Is that understood?”

“If that was Feyre -” I began.

Rhys snarled at me. “I get it Azriel. Now, stop. I am ordering you to get it together.”

Cass looked at me. “Az, please. We need you there tonight. We can’t give away what we know. And I don’t want anyone to think that you're not able to do your job.” Cassian sounded desperate.

I began to wonder how Rhys had kept it together Under the Mountain, when Amarantha was torturing Feyre and he could do nothing. Suddenly, I understood how difficult that must have been for him. I looked up at Rhys and his eyes told me, he understood. I calmed myself as best as I could.

“I’m going to say goodbye to her.” I turned and walked up the stairs.

Myrrh sat on the bed, holding a sweater in her hands. She seemed to be lost in thought. I closed the door behind me and she looked up. She looked afraid.

I crossed the room and knelt in front of her, taking the sweater and setting it down before pulling her into my arms.

“I’m not mad at you,” I whispered to her.

“I didn’t want to tell you.”

“He will never touch you again. Ever.” I promised her. And it was the truth because if he ever came near her again I would probably be unable to control myself tearing him limb from limb.

I glanced down at her face, noticing the tears running down her cheeks. I kissed her nose, the way I used to before the mating bond, when we were still very young and I was still at camp. There was a place not far from the camp that we had snuck off to many times. Wrapped in my shadows, as the sun set and the shadows became long, we would vanish. I would hold her in my arms and kiss her, the one person who had some understanding of what it was like to be alone, who understood me. I had no idea why the mating bond had not kicked in during those moments. Why it waited until years later, even though I knew long before then that she was my mate. My world. 

“I swear, you will be safe in Dawn Court.” I told her. “I will come see you tonight.”

Cass knocked on the door, quietly. “We need to go.” he said. He never opened the door. I think he realized that I needed to do this on my terms. 

We stood up and I pulled her close one last time. I kissed her gently, letting it consume me for a moment, the way I used to let her kisses take me over. For an instant, I felt like we were still young, before everything that happened, like we were hiding from her father.

“I love you.” I whispered to her.

“I love you too, Azriel,” she murmured back.


	34. The Shadow of Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys hears information from Lucien that suggests his sister is more powerful than they thought.

I paced the dining room, waiting. Cassian had returned from Dawn Court with word that Thesan would be attending and his promise that Myrrh would be safe there. I had sent messages to all of the High Lords, requesting them to come tonight. I needed to see how the others were going to react to Scythia in our presence. Azriel had been detached but efficient. I hated making him feel like this but I had no choice. Myrrh could not be here, for her safety and I needed Azriel here.

Feyre had told me a few minutes earlier that everything would be prepared and little by little, I began receiving word from other High Lords that they would be present. I had explained very little to them, simply telling them that a Lord from Scythia wished to make our acquaintance. All of them understood my meaning. We had been fooled once. None of us would make that mistake again.

Cassian was dressed in his leathers and I assumed that Az was also getting ready. I certainly hoped that he was because I needed him at his best tonight. Prythian would depend on it. Feyre came down, dressed beautifully and I wondered how she managed it when there was so much that would change depending on how this went. 

“Rhys,” she said quietly, “are you sure about this?”

“Yes. I need to show them what we are, who we are. I will not let Prythian fall into what happened before.”

“It’s not possible,” she said calmly. “Elain said -”

“Elain says a lot of things,” I reminded her. “It doesn't make them true.”

Feyre scowled at me. She had much more faith in Elain than I did. 

There was a knock at the door, interrupting what Feyre was about to say. I opened the door to meet Lucien.

“Rhys, we need to talk. Right now.”

Lucien looked a little frightened. I was going to have to make my presence known in the Court of Nightmares anytime now but Lucien’s voice told me that this needed to come first. Of course, Azriel appeared just then. At least he looked ready.

I walked into the library and turned to face Lucien. “What did you find out.”

Lucien took a deep breath. “Shadowsingers are known for the powers to control shadows, right?”

I nodded. This was not new information. 

“Shadows are the gateway to the afterworld,” Lucien continued. “There are very few records on shadowsingers but there is one of note from nearly three thousand years ago. A male who seemed to know more than just how to control shadows but could commune with them in a way that no others had. He could speak of death.”

I stared at Lucien. “Death?”

He nodded and looked at Az. “Has she ever done something that seemed out of character for her? Maybe morbid?”

“What? No. She’s never killed anyone. She doesn’t even like hurting people. She seems to hate seeing others hurt, almost like she is of the Dawn Court.” 

“But she has escaped death.”

“No.” Az was firm. “Never.”

“She has though. She should have been at the camp. You both said so. Yet she wasn’t. She survived.”

Azriel and I stared at each other. Lucien wasn’t wrong. 

“And,” Lucien continued, “she seemed to know about the death of others. Eris and Mor that we know for sure.”

Lucien turned to me. “Rhys, she is incredibly powerful. She may be death itself. The bringer of death. The keeper to the afterworld.”

Azriel looked shocked. I probably did too. I know I felt it.

“How would we know?” I asked Lucien.

“That’s hard to say. It seems that the one who will become the next guard of the gate is meant to live a long life and move on to the afterworld normally. But they can wreak havoc while they live on this plane. The shadows can sometimes seep in from the afterworld, especially if the shadowsinger is not able to control their shadows well.”

“They creep in from the afterworld?” Az hesitated. “Rhys… that would explain why she doesn’t know what she’s doing. She’s losing control and she’s not the one speaking.”

For a moment, I thought I might throw up. Cass and Feyre both stood in the doorway, looking equally shocked and horrified. They had clearly heard enough. I swallowed hard. Right now, I needed to be somewhere else. This was something that would have to be dealt with later


	35. Back to the Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassian describes their first meeting with the contingent from Scythia.

Under the Mountain was a place that horrified everyone. It was, of course, Rhys’ court but in truth, Rhys never wanted that court. He dreamed of Velaris. We had that now and it was free of the horror of Amarantha. It had suffered damage in the war, yes but nothing like the other courts had.

Azriel, Rhys, and myself were used to this place. None of us liked it. The other High Fae liked it even less but they knew nothing of Velaris and Rhys would never let any of them know about it until he was sure that Prythian was secure. Possibly not even then. 

The three of us walked down the passageway leading to the throne that Rhys’ father had ruled from. Where Keir still desired to rule from. I could feel Rhys controlling the power, sending it out in waves ahead of him. He paused in the shadows and murmured quietly to me and Az, “Never show our hand.”

Azriel didn’t flinch. I knew that he was working hard at controlling a number of emotions within himself. I needed to carry this party. I could see Feyre, sitting next to Rhys’ throne, in her own, making the entire room realize that she was the High Lady of Night Court and they had better not forget it. I walked in front of Rhys, bowing before Feyre. She gave me a nod. Azriel followed Rhys and we both bowed low before him. We had sworn our loyalty to him a long time ago and we both knew that he would never make us bow under normal circumstances. This was not normal.

Around a table sat all the High Lords of Prythian. Thesan looked uncomfortable and I didn’t blame him at all. Tamlin looked like he might be sick. Beron seemed to be at home here, a fact that made me uneasy. There, opposite Rhys, sat the man we didn’t know but needed to. Lord Belsar of Scythia. He rose from his seat and did not bow. Rhys frowned.

“Greetings, Lord Rhysand. I have heard much about you. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

“So you are the person who is wandering through kingdoms looking for a lost, little slave?” Rhys hardly looked at Belsar, putting on his bored act.

“She was hardly a slave. She was very important to me. A lover, if you will.”

I could feel the ire around Azriel flare for a moment and somehow he pulled it back. 

“Well, surely you have others. Or was there only one pretty girl in all of Scythia?” he chuckled.

“Hardly. But perhaps you would look at the image and tell me if you know her?” Belsar approached the throne. Rhys ignored him but I did not.

“You were not invited to approach.” I snapped. I marched down the dias and snatched the paper from him. “You do not approach Lord Rhysand unless you are asked to.”

“My apologies,” Belsar simpered. He was putting on an act too and now I was worried. He clearly knew something that we didn’t.

I took the picture to Rhys who glanced at it and shrugged.

“She hardly looks that important. But if I should see her, I’ll let you know. The more important question is what you are doing here now, on our land. Uninvited.” He let the last word hang in the air.

Rhys lifted his head and fixed Belsar with a stare and I could feel the power that Rhys let hang in the air. It wasn’t Belsar who spoke though.

“You know, that picture looks very much like your sister, Rhysand.”

Tamlin. Of course it was Tamlin.

Rhysand stood up from his throne and stared down Tamlin with a look of fury. “Then perhaps you should ask your father about her wings or have you forgotten that he killed both her and my mother?”

The room was silent. Rhysand rarely spoke of them because that wound ran very deep. Tamlin, however, did not back down.

Belsar seemed interested in this. I noticed that Azriel was watching him closely.

“Perhaps he did not kill your sister.”

“Are you suggesting that he killed some other Illyrian and stole her wings to make me think my sister was dead? That would be an interesting move Tamlin. Why would he want to do that? Did you decide that my sister wasn’t good enough for you to marry?”

Feyre let a moment of surprise pass over her face. She knew very little of this story and so had no idea that Tamlin had been set to marry anyone before her, let alone Rhysand’s sister.

I noticed several faces around the table seemed surprised. Rhys rarely spoke of anything personal in public. This was new territory for many of the High Lords. Beron seemed especially interested in all this.

“I never wanted to marry your sister. After all, she had already been sullied by a nasty Illyrian.” Tamlin gave a glance over at Azriel who looked like he was about to kill Tamlin. That would not be a good thing for many, many reasons. 

“If you are suggesting that my sister was somehow less than appropriate with a member of my court, you had better have some proof, Tamlin.” Rhys’ tone of voice was a warning. Tamlin didn’t seem to know if he should cross Rhys or not.

“Could this be your sister then?” asked Belsar in the silence.

“No. I’ve just told you that she was killed.” Rhys snarled at him. Belsar grinned. I very much did not like this.

Apparently, neither did Rhys, who must have had enough. Belsar’s face went slack and I had no clue what Rhys was doing inside his head but it was not a polite thing.

The room went silent again. Everyone was watching Rhys. He very slowly released his hold of Belsar’s mind. “I strongly suggest you leave Prythian and do not come back. Ever.”

Belsar looked up at Rhys and smiled. “Oh, I will leave but I will be back.”

I was confused because Belsar seemed to have no idea that Rhys had just smushed his mind somehow. I was quickly realizing that we needed to get Azriel out of there and fast because he still had his eyes fixed on Tamlin and if that male spoke again, he may not survive to have an heir.

Belsar got up from the table with his two guards and left the room. Rhysand followed him out and glanced at Azriel. 

“This meeting is over,” snarled Rhys. “Apparently some of us would rather ally themselves against Prythian.” he stared at Beron as he said it and for a moment Beron had the sense to look afraid. “I will be in touch with the rest of you.”

I stood there, watching Rhys leave, as I usually did. I glanced over at Azriel. He had his eyes trained on Tamlin who seemed to be enjoying having some sort of power over Az. Feyre stood next to me. She seemed to sense that there was serious trouble brewing.

“Azriel. If you would accompany me please.” Her voice was quiet. Az bowed his head at her, finally pulling his look from Tamlin.

“Of course, my lady.”

Several of the other Lords had left the room. Tamlin glanced at Keir before I left the room and I suddenly knew all I needed to know. Keir knew. We had told him as much. Tamlin wasn’t bluffing. Keir had told him.


	36. Strength

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel worries about Myrrh and recalls the night their mating bond came into place.

I walked with Feyre and could feel her trying to calm me.

“Stop. I didn’t kill him.”

“Well, not yet anyway,” she replied.

“I’ll agree with that. I may still.”

“Az, no. I have no warm feelings for Tamlin. You know that, but he doesn’t deserve death. He’s hurting. We all are.”

“How did he know about her?”

“That was our own fault,” came Cass’ voice from behind us. “Keir. He told Tamlin. Why Tamlin cares, I don’t know.”

I turned and stared at Cass. “Why he cares? Rhys told the whole room. Tamlin was supposed to marry her.”

“He hasn’t done well with that, has he?” asked Feyre sadly.

“That was centuries ago Az,” Cass said quietly. “Why does it matter now?”

“I will remind you once that she is my mate Cassian. Tamlin isn’t stupid and he likely knew about us. There were all kinds of rumours.”

Cass stared at me.

“Of course, I knew about the rumors,” I told him. “What kind of spymaster would I be if I didn’t? We didn’t care about the rumors, mostly because her father was unaware of them or didn’t worry about them. He seemed convinced that we were nothing to each other.”

Once we were back at the townhouse, I was anxious. All I wanted was to escape and find Myrrh. To know that she was safe, to hold her, to take her to bed with me. But she was in Dawn Court and going to stay there until tomorrow. 

Rhys watched me pace around the house several times. It must have been driving him crazy. He finally came up to me and whispered in my ear, “Thesan said it’s the east side, and there’s a balcony. There are only two rooms on that side and only the one with a balcony. Thesan said if you wanted to go, he would be alright with it.”

I stared at Rhys for a moment.

“Go, Az. Be with her. Please, before you drive me nuts.”

I winnowed to the furthest border I could and found myself staring at Thesan’s home. I looked at all the towers and rooms and quickly realized what Thesan had meant. There were a lot of open spaces but only two rooms on the east side of the building that could be seen. And there was one balcony.

I walked as calmly as I could, not wanting to be rude. I came upon a winged guard. A Peregryn. He glanced at me and nodded. I had only one question.

“Can I fly?”

The guard shrugged. “Sure, I guess.”

I took off into the night sky and hoped that she was still awake. I landed on the balcony quietly. 

“Myrrh?” I hoped she could hear me. I didn’t want to scare her. A moment later, she pulled the door open and gasped.

“Rhys told me you were coming.” She buried her face into my chest and I wrapped my arms around her. I could feel the mating bond throb between us. It had hardly been this strong since the first time.

That ball at Winter Court. I was there as protection for the family. Rhysand wandered around the party talking to people, flirting with women. I sighed. His father was across the room with his mother at his side. She looked a little bored. And then there was Myrrh. She moved around the room so gracefully, talking with everyone. You would never guess how uncomfortable she was. I could see it in the little gestures she made though. She wanted out of there.

Her hair was half up, the way she almost always did it for parties like this. Like that Starfall. It was beautiful and I could see her neck. I wanted to kiss her like I had that night on Starfall. Her dress was different though. This dress was deep green. It reminded me of the trees at the camps. The neckline was high but the back dipped low. Her skin was a milky white but she had freckles across her shoulders. I couldn’t see them from here but I knew they were there. 

Rhys sat down next to me, distracting me from my thoughts, which were going dangerous places. “I hate parties.”

“Yeah,” I joked, “I can tell.”

“Maybe I’m tired Az. Ever think of that?” He had a laugh on his face, even as he tried to sound serious.

“Sure Rhys,” I teased him back. 

I sensed her presence before I saw her. I could smell the jasmine and apple that always announced her. I looked up and something in the world shifted. I felt something strange happen.

She must have felt it too because she looked at me curiously. I shook my head subtly, telling her I had no idea what that was.

“Azriel,” she said formally, “I was thinking that it’s warm in here and I’d like to get some air. Would you come with me?”

I nodded my head and stood up, looking down at Rhys who waved his hand. He had set his eyes on another woman. I shook my head and offered Myrrh my arm. “My lady.”

She smiled and we walked across the room to where her mother stood stiffly next to her father.

“I need some air,” she said to her mother. “Azriel is coming with me.”

Her father glanced down at me and nodded. “Fine,” he said gruffly.

I walked outside with her on my arm and we began to walk through the gardens. It was nice back here. It was very quiet and there seemed to be all kinds of little alcoves where you could hide.

“Are you warm enough?” I asked.

She nodded and walked over to a little bench surrounded by several bushes.

I sat down next to her, trying to keep some distance in case somebody was watching us. I sent some shadows out and saw that we were well and truly alone. 

I took a deep breath and turned to look at her again.

And suddenly it hit me full force. I gasped for breath.

Myrrh suddenly turned to look at me and had a look of surprise on her face.

“Azriel,” she whispered.

I leaned over and kissed her, hard. I was trying to gain some control over this but it was almost spiraling out of control. My mate. This beautiful, precious woman was my mate. I tried to breathe deeply and all I could smell was her. It was torture. I wanted to be inside of her, right now, and could have cared less who saw me. She was mine.

“My mate,” I murmured as I kissed down her neck and let my hands ghost over her wings. She let out a small moan of pleasure and I grinned, kissing my way back up her neck.

“Az, we can’t do this here.”

“Why not,” I whispered.

It hadn’t escaped me that she was nearly in my lap. She wanted this as badly as I did right now.

“I am yours, Azriel.”

Would anyone notice if we went missing, I wondered to myself. I decided in that moment I did not care if her father walked in on us. I wanted her. I needed her.

I grabbed her hand. “Come on.”

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere nobody will think to look for us,” I told her.

Five minutes later, we were in my room. It was near her room, her brother’s room. Their parents were on the other side of this manor. Nobody would think to look for her in my room. Her room, probably but not mine. By the time anyone began to worry, she would be safe in her bed.

I pulled her inside and quietly shut the door behind us.

The memory filled my head and I let myself go back to that night for a moment. I forgot everything that Lucien told me earlier. I forgot everything that had just happened in Rhys’ court. Tonight, I was going to love her. Tomorrow we could figure out the rest.


	37. Conversations About the Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh begins to talk with Az to work out some problems.

I awoke next to Azriel, hearing the birds outside. Thesan’s home was large and warm and I felt like if Az was here with me, I could stay here forever. I rolled back toward him, breathing in his scent. I didn’t think he was awake but then he slid his arm around my waist and a slight smile appeared on his face.

“I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I murmured.

“You didn’t,” he whispered to me. “I don’t think I fell asleep.”

“Are you ok? What happened last night?”

“It’s ok,” he replied quietly. “We’ll figure last night out. I’m just happy to be next to you.”

I sighed and let my mind begin to wander. The mating bond would keep pulling him to me. I knew that from my parents. That was exactly what had started to worry me though.

“Az, you know I wouldn’t make you stay, even with the mating bond. If you truly want to be someplace else.”

He opened his eyes and looked at me. “I want to be here.”

“I know. I just don’t want you to be here because you think you have no option. If there’s someone else you would rather be with. I know that you don’t feel that way about Morrigan but I mean, surely in all this time…” I trailed off, not wanting to say it.

Azriel sat up, looking serious. “No. There is nobody else. Myrrh, I have spent hundreds of years believing that the only person who truly understood me was gone. No other girl or woman has ever gotten me the way you have. And then there’s our bond on top of that. Did I heal from that pain? Yes. I lived my life. I have my friends. I have never loved anyone other than you. Why do you keep trying to push me away?”

I sighed, laying there, trying to understand my own motives. “Az, it’s hard. I spent my life watching two people who were mates but didn’t belong together. I don’t want to end up like that, mate or not. It’s hard for me to believe that you had nobody else in your life.”

“Did you?” he asked me seriously.

“Well, no. But I also wasn’t truly me. And I didn’t get a lot of choices about what happened to me while I was there. I was kept to myself. You could go out and see the world.”

I felt the tears falling down my cheeks. Azriel pulled me close to him, held me tight and let me cry for some time. That’s why I didn’t realize that he had also started crying. Az rarely cried. I think I had seen him cry once, in the entire time we had known each other and that lasted for seconds before he pulled himself together. I looked up at him and brushed a tear off his cheek, waiting. 

When he spoke, it was very quietly. “I am so sorry for everything that happened. I wish I could have fixed it but when you were first gone, I was broken. For a long time. When Rhys told me about Tamlin’s father, I fell apart. I think Rhys figured that I blamed myself but he didn’t know the half of it. I felt as though if I had been there, it would have been different. Maybe not. I don’t know. For years, I lived life doing my job. I spied for Rhys because it was what I knew. I tried to be there for him when Amarantha was… It was bad.”

He took a breath, trying to calm himself.

“Then there was the war. I nearly died in that war. Part of me wanted to die. I was tired of living without you. I would go to sleep at night and dream about you. I would get up and go through the motions. Since the war, I had been trying to decide what to do. How I was going to go on without you. And then, all of a sudden, here you are. With me again. It’s like the sun came out from behind a shadow and I can feel again. When I felt you through Rhys again, to know that you were alive, I almost couldn’t breathe. And then they walked into the house with you. When Cassian told you about your mother like that, I nearly killed him but I had to take care of you. Holding you, in my arms again, I never felt so complete.”

I leaned up and kissed him. There was a lot in that kiss and I think he understood. For a moment, he didn’t move. And then he had his arms around me, holding me to him. It was hard for me to accept that he loved me even after all this time apart. I hated thinking about the things that they had all gone through. I lived a fairly nice existence with some moments that I would rather forget. It seemed like most of them wished they could simply forget all of that time. 

The entire world had revolved around escaping. I hadn’t given any thought to what had happened while I was gone.

“I think we can start over, sort of,” I told him quietly. “We can’t just pick up where we left off but maybe we can take what we had then and add to it.”

Az smiled at me. “I think I’d like that.”

After we both thoroughly thanked Thesan for his generosity, Az and I headed back to Velaris. I was still in some awe that Velaris was a secret and nobody else knew. 

“How can Rhys keep the best of himself hidden from the world?” I asked Az confused. My brother had never been one to hide himself.

“I’ve tried to convince him that he needs to let everyone see that side of him. It’s hard though. That’s what landed us with Amarantha, believing that she intended good when she never did.” Az sighed and ran his hands through his hair. We walked slowly down the street towards the house. Suddenly, I got an uneasy feeling. Something wasn’t right.


	38. The Future You Can't See

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys finds a priestess to answer some questions that Tamlin has asked.

I was reading the letter in front of me and trying to contain my fury. Cass was calmly standing next to me but I could tell that he was thinking hard. 

“This is ridiculous. He’s doing this out of spite,” I snarled.

“We just need to figure out what to do, that’s all. There has to be a way out of it or around it or something,” Cass said, sounding far less convinced than he was pretending to be.

Tamlin had included a copy of a letter that had my father’s signature on it. A promise that Tamlin would marry my sister. Whether he heard about it from Keir, Beron, or Belsar made no difference. He knew that she was alive and he wanted to make good on the promise.

It was that moment that Az and Myrrh returned from Dawn Court. 

Azriel looked at Cass and then at me. “What’s wrong?” he asked darkly.

“Tamlin,” I growled, “has decided that he wants to marry my sister and that I am to send her to him.”

I knew exactly what Az was going to do. I’d have done the same thing. His wings flared in anger as he growled at the thought. 

“Does he know about the mating bond?” asked Cass. “Surely that has to take priority.”

“Do you really think he cares?” I asked Cass. My sister looked surprisingly calm, which I didn’t take as a good sign.

“I thought that our Illyrian bond would take priority over anything. You can’t marry someone who is already married.”

I stared at her for a moment before recalling the conversation that we had after Amren’s revelation. I had been so overtaken by all the other information that I had completely forgotten that in a way, they were already married. The real question was if Tamlin would accept that marriage.

I needed to talk with a priestess. I hated the idea with a passion but there was no other option. Only a priestess could tell me if there was a way out of this.

Fortunately, I knew where to find one.

Daemera had been the priestess of the Night Court for many years now. She was much older than most of the other priestesses but that was a very good thing. It meant that she had seen more than most of them. I hated bringing my sister to her but I also knew that Myrrh and Az would have to be there.

We headed to the entrance to the Court of Nightmares. Once inside, I took a path that was normally ignored. It was dark and there were only a few areas that had light. For Myrrh and Az, the shadows were natural. I was uneasy. At the end of the passageway, we came to a door. I knocked twice.

“Enter, Rhysand.” Her voice was even old. I pushed open the door and Azriel slipped in next, with Myrrh tucked somewhat behind him.

“What business does the High Lord of Night Court seek with me?” she hesitated and then spoke before I could answer. “The daughter of the first High Lord in your line. And here they thought she was dead. I warned many. None listened. Come child.”

Myrrh hesitated, glancing at me. I nodded, trying to reassure her that it was safe. Or as safe as it could be. Myrrh knelt down in front of the old lady who stared at her with dark eyes. I wondered when she had last been outside.

“Ah yes. Your father came to me before your brother. He wanted to know what powers you had. He never realized how little he knew about the shadowsingers. But you are not alone.”

She glanced up at Azriel.

“Who has done this?”

“An Illyrian priestess,” Myrrh whispered shakily.

“You are asking about the Lord of Spring, I presume,” the old lady asked looking up at me.

“Yes. He asks for –“

“He asks for what he cannot have. The mating bond is strong between these two, yes. However, there is more magic here. Their souls are bonded, done by magic older than I. No priestess could wed her to him.”

Azriel’s body seemed to relax with the knowledge that Myrrh was safely his. The priestess looked at him carefully.

“You, boy. You know not what magic you used. This bond will last beyond life and you knew not what her fate was. Yours is now tied to hers. Someday to be High Lord and Lady of the Afterworld.”

Az looked back at me and I shrugged. I didn’t know what to make of that or if what the priestess as saying was true.

“It is more than true, High Lord.” 

I shivered with her clear ability to know exactly what I was thinking. Like she could see into the future. Daemera turned back to Myrrh.

“Myrrh, Bringer of the Shadows, your children will someday bring the Illyrians to a power they have never known. Raise them well, with the heart that you know.”

Daemera looked up at me. “You have much in front of you High Lord. Know that your children will bring peace to Prythian. Let them all see who you truly are in your heart Rhysand, High Lord of the Night.”

Daemera lowered her head, as if she fell asleep. I placed my hand on Myrrh shoulder, an indication that we should go. She paused before she stood up and looked at the old lady again. 

“Thank you,” she whispered.

I heard nothing else from the priestess, but Myrrh stood, and Az placed her in front of him , following me out, protecting her from both sides. He closed the door, and we retraced our path back to the now setting sun.

“Rhys, what do we tell Tamlin?” asked Az once we were well away from the spookiness of the priestess. 

“I suppose we tell him the truth. Any other priestess would tell him the same. What did she mean though, that your soul is tied to hers? And who are the High Lord and Lady of the Afterworld?”

“She meant us,” whispered Myrrh shakily. “I could see what she was saying in my mind, Rhys. She means that Az and I will someday rule over the Afterworld.”

Azriel and I stared at Myrrh. “You were seeing things?” I asked her in astonishment.

“Yes. It was strange. Like a dream but it seemed so real.”

I stood there for a moment, fixated on what Myrrh said. Was the priestess telling us our future? And if so, she told me that my children – the children I did not yet have – would bring peace to Prythian. And she told me to do something that I had been avoiding doing – showing the High Lords Velaris, my heart. 

“How could that be?” murmured Az, staring at Myrrh.

Myrrh shook her head and I looked at Azriel. “Let’s get home.”

He nodded and soon we found ourselves wandering down the streets of our beautiful home.


	39. Lineage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel reflects with his family on what they have learned.

Myrrh settled herself into a chair in the study as Cassian and Rhys discussed options. One of them was going to have to deliver the news to Tamlin and he likely would not take it well. Feyre was also settled into a chair, reading something. Myrrh wasn’t reading though. She stared into the world in front of her, clearly thinking. The knock on the door startled all of us. 

I answered the door to find Lucien standing there. He looked a little worried.

“I’ve been asked to act as the emissary for the High Lord of Spring.”

I nodded. “You should probably come in. We’ve found some things out.”

Lucien walked into the study and glanced around the room. “Where’s Mor?”

“Still not speaking to me,” shrugged Rhys. “She’ll come around eventually.”

“Maybe she’s busy with a friend?” suggested Feyre.

Rhys glanced at Feyre who went back to her book and Rhys frowned but went back to Lucien. 

“You were saying you are the emissary to Tamlin?”

“Well, he asked me to come and bring Myrrh. I’m guessing that won’t happen.”

“Not at all,” I replied. “But he actually couldn’t have her even if I yielded to him.”

Lucien looked curious.

“Lucien, she and Az have been bonded by some kind of Illyrian magic. Tamlin can talk to any priestess he wants. She has assured me that this is very binding. Myrrh literally is part of Az now.”

“What about all those years she was in Scythia?”

“Well, they never tried to marry her, did they? I mean if Tamlin just wants Myrrh there to stare at him all day and wander around his grounds, I guess we can do that. He can’t marry her though.” Rhys sighed, clearly still trying to work out all the information he had been handed.

“We can be separated,” I explained, “but she can’t be married to anyone else. So, I guess if Tamlin wants a bunch of illegitimate children…”

Myrrh glared up at me and I felt ashamed. “Sorry.”

“Well, alright, I’ll go talk with him. He won’t take it well and he may want to talk to other priestesses,” said Lucien finally.

“That’s fine,” said Myrrh quietly. “I’ll go to any of them for him.”

Lucien looked at her and for once, I wish I knew what he was thinking, that I could see inside the other male’s head. He watched Myrrh for several moments and the look on his face was wistful. Our mating bond was strong but I was also calm enough right now that seeing him look at her like that didn’t bother me. I still didn’t like it and I watched Lucien as carefully as he watched Myrrh.

Rhys seemed to recognize the tension because suddenly he stood up, “Thank you, Lucien. I’m sorry but if you don’t mind could you go let Tamlin know? And,” Rhys paused for a moment, as if he was thinking. And then, “tell him I’m sorry.”

Lucien stared at Rhys as if he had no idea who he was. Even Feyre looked up, eyes wide. That priestess seemed to have had an effect on him because I couldn’t recall Rhys apologizing for anything even when he knew he was wrong and felt awful. Even Cassian looked surprised.

Rhys walked Lucien to the door, and they had a hushed conversation that I couldn’t hear. It didn’t matter because I knew that Myrrh was staying here. 

Cass sat with a book in front of him, pondering something. I walked over to see what he was looking at and discovered it was a history of Rhys’ family. “What are you two trying to find out?”

“Rhys was thinking that the priestess may have known about someone in his family having done weird things and that could explain some of the things he said. But as far as I can see, his family is pretty normal. It’s High Fae up until his mother married his father. Nobody seemed to have any odd powers. The only thing is this notation next to their parents. There’s a question mark next to his mother.”

“I don’t get that either,” said Rhys coming back in the room. “What does that mean? She was my mother, clearly and Myrrh’s.”

“Yeah, wings kind of give that away,” I replied.

“Maybe the person who wrote it was wondering what her family history was?” suggested Feyre.

“You’d be hard-pressed to find out,” I told her. “Illyrians don’t keep records like this, even of High Illyrian families. Given that their mother was a laundress, she didn’t have any established history.”

“You know,” Rhys began slowly, “I’ve always wondered about that. Why would a High Fae marry an Illyrian, especially one that wasn’t even from a prominent family? I get the mating bond but something about it is odd.”

“Father never listened to anyone, Rhys. Why would he have started then? He took the throne. He took our mother. Whatever he wanted, he just did it.” Myrrh spoke so matter of factly that I was surprised. I had never thought of it like that before. 

“Family trait, that” muttered Cass under his breath. Rhys glanced down at him but ignored the comment.

Rhys then turned his attention to his sister. “Are you feeling alright? Ever since we got back you seem out of sorts.”

“I can’t explain it. I just feel like I understand my path now.” Myrrh told him.

“We don’t even know what she said was true,” I pointed out.

Myrrh looked at me. “Could you not see it too?”

“I think it was because she was touching you,” said Rhys. “She was careful to never touch Az or I. Can you let me see what she showed you?”

Rhys sat down in a chair next to the table and looked at his sister who finally nodded. I understood that she didn’t like letting Rhys in her head but sometimes it was a useful thing. 

I crossed the room to her and sat on the arm of the chair. “I’m right here.” She smiled up at me and I knew she understood what I meant. She felt safer with me close by.

Myrrh closed her eyes and nodded her head. Rhys glanced at me. I nodded at him and waited. After several moments, Rhys glanced back at me and took a deep breath. “I think she actually showed her the future.”

Rhys’ announcement caused Feyre to sit up in her chair and look. “She saw the future? Like Elain?”

“No,” said Rhys. “It wasn’t like that at all. The priestess showed her images but they weren’t linear. It was all jumbled like there were some things that were more definite than others maybe? It got foggier as she went.”

I turned and look at Myrrh, who looked a little shaken. 

“Rhys, she called me High Lady of the Afterworld. What does she mean by that?”

Rhys frowned. I got a distinct feeling he was thinking the same thing I was but neither of us wanted to speak it out loud. 

“I think the more important question is why she referred to you as the bringer of shadows. I’ve never heard our family referred to like that before.”

“No,” I said slowly, carefully. “That is an Illyrian family name.”


	40. Bargains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassian calls in a favor to help Rhys get information.

I had thought that the name sounded familiar but when Az said it, I suddenly recalled what he meant. 

“Shadowbringer is an old Illyrian name. My father, he knew several males from that family line.” Az looked disgusted.

“So why would she refer to Myrrh by that name?” puzzled Rhys.

I stared down at the old book that had Rhys’ family history in it. And his mother’s wasn’t there.

“What if your mother comes from that family?” I asked Rhys.

Rhys turned and looked at me. 

“It might explain some things,” I pointed out. “Why would your father have married a common Illyrian. He likely wouldn’t have but he would have married someone with a family heritage that was based in royalty, even if she wasn’t High Fae.”

“My mother was a laundress when she met my father,” said Rhys evenly.

“Yes, but what was she before that? Have you ever met any family from your mother’s side?”

“No,” said Myrrh quietly. “She never talked about her family.”

“I know that family line,” said Azriel, trying to stay calm. “They were horrible to the females in the family. Very old fashioned ideas about women not needing wings and just having children.”

Rhys and Myrrh looked at each other. Rhys had told me before that his mother was insistent that his sister keep her wings, that she be proud of them. She had been fiercely protective of her daughter, in a way that made you wonder why.

“How could we even find out?” asked Rhys finally.

“I have some ideas,” I told him

By the next morning, I had crafted a detailed plan for how to try and find what I wanted to know. It was going to require calling in some favors but I felt sure that I could get what I wanted. I just wasn’t going to like having to do it. 

I flew out to the camp where I knew I would find the person I needed. Isander was part of a very old Illyrian family. He would know where I could get records or tell me what I needed to know. And he owed me big.

I marched into the camp, knowing that I was on dangerous territory. Many of the Illyirans I trained with still hated me. They also knew not to mess with me because I was dangerous. You didn’t get to where I was if you didn’t wield considerable power. 

Isander was in charge of this camp and I walked straight to the tent where he would be. I could hear the murmurs of males as I passed. They recognized me. I would probably prefer they not recognize me but I couldn’t hide.

“Isander,” I called at the tent entrance, “it’s Cassian.”

The man who appeared at the entrance was exactly as I remembered him. He had dark hair and dark eyes and looked like the kind of person who would start a fight in a bar. He had started many.

“Well, well. Is there something that I can help you with?”

“Possibly. Can we talk inside?”

He looked me up and down before asking, “You came alone?”

“Yes.”

He moved aside and let me into the tent. I didn’t sit down. I didn’t trust him enough to sit. He, however, sat back in his chair and looked me up and down again. 

“What can I do for the General Commander of the Night Court’s armies?”

I didn’t like his tone but I was hoping that I could get what I needed without too many difficulties.

“I need information. About an Illyrian family.”

“Go on.”

“They’re an old family, Shadowbringer.”

“Yes, I know that name. What information could you possibly need about them?”

“I need to know their family history. Is there a place where Illyrian histories are recorded?”

“What an odd question,” he replied with a sneer. “What reason would you have to find out about old Illyrian families, Cassian?”

“My reasons are none of your business. Now, are you going to help me or not because I don’t have all day.”

Part of me held my breath because I didn’t want to tell him anything more than I had to. I was certain he knew why I wanted to know but he only knew about half of the reason and I was not going to tell him about Myrrh.

“Well, I don’t know. When you speak to me like that,” he trailed off.

“Isander, do not forget all the things I have done for you. You know who I work for and the kinds of things I can continue to do for you.”

He got up from his chair. “Is that a threat?”

“No,” I hissed, taking three steps toward him, “it is a reminder that it is never a good idea to mess around with those who are stronger than you.”

“Perhaps we should find out who is stronger.”

I grabbed my sword and closed the distance between us in three more steps. “My wings may have been damaged in the war but my arm was not,” I snarled. “Or have you forgotten that I know exactly how to use this sword?”

He backed up but I didn’t move. He looked down at the sword in my hand and back up at me before smiling. “I would never want to fight such an old friend.”

I waited.

“If you find a priestess, they can tell you about the old families. I’m not aware of that information being written anywhere.”

“Thank you for your help,” I replied quietly. I moved slowly out of the tent keeping an eye on Isander the whole time. Then I got out of the camp as fast as my wings would allow. I didn’t trust the man at all.

Finding a priestess wouldn’t be hard at all because Az had told me exactly where to find one. Or at least, where one used to live... 

I headed in the direction Az had told me. The woods became denser and then slowly thinned out a little. The trees were still very close together, but I managed to spot the small cottage. Hopefully, it was still occupied.

I landed a good distance away because I wanted to surveil the area and I didn’t want to surprise the resident if she still lived there. The cottage looked fairly well kept, so I was hopeful. I knocked lightly.

A moment later, an incredibly old woman answered the door.

“Can I help you?” she asked quietly.

I bowed. “Yes. I was hoping that you could give me some information.”

The old lady frowned at me. “I have little information to give.”

“Please. It’s about an old family. I can pay you well.”

She looked me up and down, considering. “You are Illyrian?”

I nodded. 

“Come inside.”

Being inside was a shock to the senses. There was a heavy scent of incense in the air. It was hot and the air was humid. There were about a hundred plants in various pots around the place. I tried not to show that I was uncomfortable. 

She pointed at a chair next to the table, so I sat down as she eased into a plush chair near the fire. 

“What is it you seek to know?”

“There is an old Illyrian family with the last name Shadowbringer. I was wondering if you knew any of the family history. Did the family have children and what became of them?”

She eyed me suspiciously. “Was there a particular child you were interested in?”

I paused. “A daughter. Her name would have been Malsana.”

“Money first.” She held out her hand and I dropped the bag of money into it. 

The air in the room was heavy. I don’t think anyone had spoken Rhys’ mother’s name in centuries. It made me sad, knowing how much she loved her children, how she cared for me and Azriel, and then her life was taken from her because of her husband’s stupidity.

“Then you want to know about the former High Lady of Night Court.”

“She was?”

“Yes. She married the High Lord after running away from her family. And that is all I can tell you.”

“Thank you.”

“You wouldn’t be trying to figure out the fate of her daughter, would you?”

“No.” That wasn’t strictly a lie. I already knew where Myrrh was.

“Well, I can always use more money from the High Lord of Night. Feel free to tell him he can visit any time.”

I didn’t ask how she knew I came from the Night Court. 

I headed back to Velaris with questions in my head. If Rhys and Myrrh’s mother was actually from the Shadowbringer family, then I knew some about that family line. They were well known to be shadowsingers but usually only the males. I wasn’t aware of female demonstrating power like that. However, if the Mother brought us all forth, it only made sense that the keeper of the gates to the Afterworld would also be a female. And if that female was also a shadowsinger, well, that also made sense. 

All I knew for sure was that I needed to get Rhys this information.


	41. The Past Is Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys tries to remind his sister what he always struggles with himself - letting go of the past.

Cassian stared at me for a long time after telling me what he had learned. I couldn’t blame him. I was shocked. Of course, my father found a High Illyrian to marry. I shook my head and looked over at Azriel and Myrrh. They were sitting next to each other and both had thoughtful looks on their faces. 

“Do you think,” asked Az slowly, “that Belsar knew that Myrrh was the gatekeeper of the Afterworld? Or at least suspected that she might be?”

My sister stared at Az with a look of anger. I knew that look. I didn’t know what she was thinking but this wasn’t going to end well.

“I am not death,” Myrrh said slowly and evenly.

“It sounds like you could be,” said Azriel quietly. 

The silence that fell in the room was scary. 

“Fine then. Send me to Belsar and I can figure out what he knows.” Myrrh’s tone was dangerous.

“I don’t like that idea,” I told her, trying not to raise my voice. In truth, I hated that idea. It was the worst idea that I had ever heard. There was no way I was going to let my sister near that land. Not without me, Az and Cass to protect her.

Azriel stared at her. I could tell his thoughts were rolling around in his head. He loved her more than anything, but he was seeing the same things that I was. It was quite likely that this is what everyone had been hinting at – Myrrh had the potential to someday be the gatekeeper to the Afterworld. 

“I think that’s the most ridiculous idea I’ve ever heard,” said Azriel. I could tell he was trying to keep his voice low and even.

“I don’t know that I care what you think. If I have the powers you all think I do then it should be easy for me to find out from Belsar. He wants that power. If I go to him, he has no reason to come to Prythian. And he might tell me what he knows if he thinks that he can keep me there with him.”

The low snarl that came from Azriel surprised me. Even Cass turned and looked at him. Azriel had gotten to his feet and his wings were flared out. 

“I won’t let you,” he said, his voice still low.

I drew in a breath. I knew fully well that telling Myrrh that was like our father standing there again. I also knew that Azriel was feeling the strain on the mating bond because he could probably feel her pulling away from him. Whether she was angry or frustrated or sad, I couldn’t say. Probably all three.

“You don’t get a say in it, Azriel,” Myrrh told him from her seat.

“You are my mate. You are mine. You will do what I tell you.”

In that instant, I watched my sister break. Those words had been spoken in our house so many times by our father, often towards my mother but as Myrrh got older, he would tell her something similar. That she would do what he told her to.

“You do not dictate what I decide to do Azriel.”

“Yes,” he said icily, “I do.”

Myrrh stood up and I could feel the power coming off of her in that moment. She was furious.

“You can go to hell.” Her voice was not loud, but it was frightening.

“You’ve already accepted the bond. We are mates and I get the control here.” He said it evenly and firmly, trying not to raise his voice and also trying to convey to her what he was feeling. 

“I won’t make you a bargaining chip,” I said finally. “That’s too dangerous. I would never ask you to do that so I can’t say that I like that as a plan. There are other ways to deal with Scythia.”

Myrrh looked at me and I shook my head again. 

Azriel stood there, waiting for her to do or say something to him. Instead, she turned and walked out of the room completely ignoring him. 

For a moment, nobody said a word. And then my world shook. Azriel had been my brother for a very long time and I had never seen him cry. He sat down in the chair he had been sitting in and sobbed. I glanced at Cass who looked as surprised as I did. 

“Az,” I began quietly, “ it’s not like she won’t calm down.” I wasn’t sure I believed what I was saying but I needed to say something to him.

“Rhys, I don’t know what to say to her right now and I know that what I just said was all wrong. But I can’t let her do that. I just can’t” He was trying to take breaths in between the words and the end result was hard to understand.

“You’re right about the words being wrong but if you just go talk with her, she may begin to listen. Our father never did that.”

He shook his head. “She’s gotten it into her head that she’s a monster and that she needs to leave us all. She’s convinced that will fix everything.”

“Let me talk to her then. Maybe I can make her see reason.” I turned to Cass and glanced back at Az. He seemed to get my silent message to stay with him.

I had ideas about where she would go. In fact, there was likely only one place that she would be. I pushed the library door open quietly and looked around. My sister could hide in shadows, but she couldn’t hide her mind from me. I looked around the room until I found the spot where I knew she was.

“I know you’re over there,” I whispered.

“Go away Rhys.”

“Sorry little sister. That’s not going to happen right now. I am worried about you. Very worried.”

I walked over to the winder seat where she sat. I looked out the window and stared up at the sky.

“The stars are like magic,” I whispered to her.

“I used to stare up at the sky in Scythia and wonder what was happening here. If you were ok. If Cass had become some war hero or great general. If Az…,” she stopped.

“I’m sorry,” I told her. “If I had thought, even for a second, that you were still alive, I would have turned over every rock in the world to find you.”

“You couldn’t have known,” she said simply.

“In a way, this was better,” I said. “You would have hated the person I had to be for Amarantha. I hate the person I had to be for her.”

“She never mentioned me?” she asked me.  
“Never,” I replied. “In fact, my family never came up. I avoided the topic. But I remind myself every day that if I let her dictate how I live now, she wins even though she’s long dead.”  
I reached down and took her hand, the way I used to when she was little. “Little sister with big dreams.”

She shook her head. “I don’t have any dreams. I’m destined to rule over the dead.”

“Now you’re being dramatic,” I teased her. She said nothing to me.

“No,” I said firmly, “you’re going to help us defend Prythian. Without you, we would have no idea about Belsar. He could mount an army and catch us completely off guard. This way, we can be proactive. And you are out of your mind if you ever think for half a second that I would make you play whore the way I had to for her. I don’t care what Belsar wants. You are my sister, not a gift or a pawn. And Azriel loves you. He’s my brother but he would try to kill me if I ever considered such a thing as a possibility.”

“Azriel doesn’t need me,” she said.

“Are you joking?” I asked her, astonished. “You have no idea how much Az changed since you’ve been back. I always took his demeanor for just Az. But it’s not. He’s like he used to be when you’re around. He smiles. Cauldron knows, before you got here getting him to smile was impossible. He functioned, day to day and did what he needed to. Sometimes, I’d even see him laugh. He always seemed like part of him was missing though. And I admit, I thought that was because he was pining for Mor. We all thought that. But that was never it and I can see that now. You were the part of him that was missing. He needs you, desperately.”

My sister was as still as a statue. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking. I didn’t want to slip into her mind to find out either. She needed to make this decision on her own and it wasn’t mine to know about. 

“He’s still in the study,” I told her. “I don’t think he has it in him to actually move right now. He was too horrified by what you were suggesting. He’s your mate, remember, and I can tell you from experience, the desire to protect your mate is powerful. Some of his reaction was purely that desire. But he loves you. He was crying.”

She shifted slightly. She was either surprised by my words or horrified. I decided I’d said enough. I leaned over and kissed the top of her head.

“I’m going to bed. I’ll see you in the morning and we can come up with a plan.” I turned a walked away, hoping that she would go find Azriel and make everything alright with him.


	42. Starting Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Azriel apologizes, Myrrh apologizes. It's very short.

I sat in the chair in the study and stared into the dark. I had darkened the room to sit in my misery and so nobody would see the tears. Rhys hadn’t said a word about it when he left but I was sure he had seen. I was ashamed of that. After Rhys had left, Cassian stayed in the room. He left when Rhys came back. Myrrh wasn’t with him and I continued to sit there, miserable.

I did the one thing I had sworn I would never do. 

I told her she had to obey me.

Of all the conversations we had, so many were about her father and how he had treated her and her mother. She despised that he would simply decree something to her mother, and she would. She despised that mating bond between her parents. She felt sure that her mother needed something different. She had said so often that she never wanted to be trapped like her mother had been. 

I had been shocked when she accepted ours. Maybe that’s why it had been so long before it truly snapped into place. Knowing in your heart that you’ve found your mate and feeling the force of the pull when that bond manifests are two very different things. The night the mating bond revealed itself was one that I never would have anticipated. She had felt the bond and chosen to stay with me. 

So many times, I had sworn to her that I would never tell her she had to obey me. I had also trusted that she would never want to be separated from me. Hearing her tell Rhys that she would go to Scythia and offer herself up like some kind of gift nearly broke me. In that instant, all I could feel was a desire to protect her from herself. I wondered if that’s how Rhys’ father had felt. I wondered if Rhys felt that with Feyre.

Instead, I had said those awful words to her, that she would obey me. Of course, she refused to hear them. It tore me apart to say it, but I had been horrified even as I said it. In that moment, I knew that she hated me.

I had no idea how much time had passed since Rhys left. I sat and fought with myself, thinking about everything I had said and done and critiquing all of it. Most of all, I couldn’t understand why she would ever think that I didn’t care. My heart actually felt as though it had broken.  
I heard the rustle of her wings as she walked down the hall. I held my breath, wondering where she was going. 

“Azriel?” she whispered.

“I’m in here,” I said quietly.

I could hardly imagine why she wanted to come see me. Then again, Rhys had spoken with her and perhaps that had been the thing. Perhaps it was simply because enough time had passed.

She didn’t turn on any lights either. She simply walked across the room and sat down on the floor in front of my chair. For several minutes she just sat there. I didn’t want to say anything because I was afraid that the first words I spoke would be in anger. As much as I loved her, I was still mad.

“Azriel, I am a monster. A half Illyrian, half High Fae, destined to rule over the dead.”

“No. You are an amazing being who may some day rule over the Afterworld. I’ve seen a lot of death. Not all of it is bad. I imagine like anyone who rules, there are bad sides to it. But you would also be with me. And eventually our whole family.”

“You mean Rhys? Or Mor?”

“I mean all of them. They are all my family. I want them all in my life, but you are the one person that I need in my life. I would avoid Mor for the rest of time if it meant that you would be happy.”

“I’m sure my father believed that once, too. He bedded plenty of females but always told my mother that she was what he needed. I don’t think that was ever true. It was all about power for him. Everything was about power for him.”

“I never loved Mor. I mean, as a friend, yes, because she’s part of my family here but I never loved her like that. And I was honest with you when I said that I have been to bed with her. But I have only ever loved you,” I told her. “I don’t want to go to her at night, Myrrh. She’s not the part of me that was missing for so long.”

In the darkness, I reached out for her. She fell into my arms and I felt the tears fall down my cheek. 

“I’m sorry for saying that you had to do what I told you. I have never wanted to be like your father. I wish I had never said it.”

“I’m sorry I hurt you,” she whispered.

I didn’t say anything. I just held her in my arms. After what seemed like hours, I picked her up. She rested her head against my shoulder, and I carried her to bed.


	43. The Not So New Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Myrrh presents the idea from the previous night with a slight change. Then she apologizes more fully to Azriel.

Sometime after lunch, Az and I came downstairs to find Rhys, Cass and Lucien with a map spread out. We had spent the morning discussing how to best approach the situation with Belsar. 

“He was headed this way when I caught up with him, so I figure he’s trying to cut through Summer to get to Scythia,” said Lucien. 

“I’ll send word to Amren,” Cass said. “Maybe we can convince Belsar to meet with us at Court.”

Rhys nodded. “We still have to figure out a good way to convince him to ally with us.”

As I walked in, all three heads turned to look at me. 

“We may have an idea,” I said.

“We?” asked Cass cautiously.

“Yes. Azriel and I. We were talking about it upstairs.”

Cass opened his mouth and then shut it again. Rhys smiled. “Smart.”

“What if Belsar thought he was getting the Illyrians?” asked Az.

“Illyrians? All of them?” asked Cass.

“Yes. He wants slaves, right? What if he thought we were willing to give him the Illyrians as slaves?”

Rhys stared at Az. “What are you talking about?”

“You are out of your mind,” gasped Cassian. “First of all, how would we even get that to happen? Second of all, we don’t have any Illyrians that we could offer to him.”

Rhys stood up and looked at Az. “Explain.”  
“You can get him to take me, as a trial slave. Lucien can go along. We present Myrrh as High Lady of Night Court. While we’re there we can find out all kinds of things about Belsar.”

“Was this not the same idea from last night?” asked Cass, obviously frustrated.

Azriel looked at Rhys. “What do you think?”

Rhys walked over to the window and stared out it for a long while. He was clearly thinking about something, but he gave no indication to any of us what that might be. Finally. He turned around and look at Azriel.

“If I agreed to this, you will be personally responsible for my sister’s safety. If something happens, you need to have a way out and to get back to us because it wouldn’t be long before Belsar would figure he’d been played. And we may not be in a position to help.”

Az nodded. “Do you really think I’d let anything happen to her?” he asked Rhys.

“I don’t like the idea but I do think it has the potential to work. Drakon should be here soon and hopefully he can offer more insight. We need to know better what we’re working with. Lucien, can you talk to Belsar and see how he takes the idea?”

Lucien nodded. “Sure. I have plenty of practice sucking up to people with huge egos,” he said with an edge of sarcasm.

“I hope you don’t mean me,” said Rhys with mock surprise.

“Actually, I was thinking of another High Lord with an overinflated ego but you too,” Lucien replied with a grin.

Az shook his head as he looked at them. “We need to plan this out, I think. The more planned out this is, the better it may work.”

“Where are we going to meet him?” Rhys asked.

“Not here,” muttered Cass under his breath.

“Not Court either,” said Az quietly. “Keir knows too much and would never keep his mouth shut even under threat.”

“I doubt that Thesan would be willing to host him and Tarquin isn’t likely to want to play host either,” Cass pointed out.

“We’re running out of options here, “ said Rhys. 

“What about Autumn Court?” I asked Lucien.

Lucien stared at me like I had lost my mind. “I don’t know how you think that my father would let you anywhere near his court again. I mean, he’s an ass and would be down with the idea of Illyrians as slaves, no doubt. But he’s not stupid and he won’t let you near the Court.”

“Can we present a place that’s not somebody’s court?” asked Az after a moment. “Maybe as a more neutral ground?”

“Maybe somewhere in Spring?” said Rhys, looking at Lucien.

Lucien stared at Rhysand like he had lost his mind. “In Tamlin’s Court?”

“I mean, it would be neutral enough,” said Cassian.

“Tamlin would have to know. Being in his court could just be cause to start problems.” Azriel’s face darkened as he spoke. 

Rhys frowned. “It’s the best choice I have right now though. Lucien, can you talk with Tamlin and see if he would be… amenable to the idea?”

“I can talk with him,” shrugged Lucien. He didn’t look like that was going to get him far. I admired Lucien for being willing to talk with Tamlin though. Once, I had thought Tamlin was a friend. Then I found out what he had done to our family. I wasn’t looking forward to speaking with him.

I could tell from the frown that still lingered on Azriel’s face that he wasn’t wanting to go near Tamlin either. Generally, Az had no trouble with Tamlin, although I had heard some of the history that he had with Feyre. I understood some of how that happened. Tamlin had been promised to me and then lost me. I was sure that when he found Feyre he was terrified that she would be taken from him, and he had been right. I could understand some of the bitterness that he felt toward Rhys. 

It didn’t excuse his behavior though, and that’s where I struggled. I had known Tamlin because of Lucien. Lucien, I had met long before when my father had tried to wed me to Eris, Lucien’s brother. That fell through in a spectacular way, but I felt sure that my father was not done looking for a way to use me for his benefit. 

My father had not known about the bond that Azriel and I had forged with the priestess although he would have found out soon enough after he sent me to Spring Court. I had known full well that the trip he was sending me on was not for fun. I had overheard him telling my mother about his promising me to Tamlin. In some ways, I think he thought that since Tamlin and I were friends it might work out better. 

I had gotten a message to Azriel before we left to head to Spring through Cerridwen, so many years ago. My mother had had her suspicions about the two of us for a long time. I would never admit it to her for fear that she might inadvertently tell my father. The end result of that mess was that when Tamlin’s father attacked our camp that night, I was not there. I had been hoping to meet up with Azriel so we could decide what to do. I never got that chance. Fate had not been nice to Tamlin in the intervening years. And Az… Well, I knew now that he had struggled with my loss. Rhys had reminded me the other night that Azriel was only just getting used to having me back with him. The mating bond was a powerful thing and it had held him to me over centuries.

I needed to apologize to him for my rashness. I always spoke before I thought about what I wanted to say. It was a bad habit.

I gave a nod of my head to Az and we slipped out of the room as the others went back to the map. I headed out to the garden. It was quiet back here and a little cool since the weather was getting colder again at night.

I felt him behind me. He stopped and part of me wanted him to wrap his arms around me like he used to. Instead, I turned to face my mate and took a deep breath. I had to swallow my own pride, which was never easy for me, but it was necessary.   
He watched me curiously and waited.

I picked an apple off the nearby tree and walked over to him. I took his hand and placed the apple in it and looked in his eyes.

“I am giving you this. It’s not a meal but you understand what I mean with it, right?” I asked him.

“I’ve never asked you to do that,” he replied.

“I know. I’ve always been a child of this court. We’re apparently stubborn and obnoxious all the time. I think it runs in the blood.”

He chuckled. “You think?”

“You are my mate but before that, I loved you. I forget how protective the bond can make you feel. I need to be a little more understanding of that.” I stopped for a moment and took a breath. 

Azriel hesitated before he spoke. “I underestimated the damage that Amarantha did to Rhys under the mountain for a long time. That kind of wound takes a long time to heal and I learned watching Rhys start to heal that sometimes you do stupid things at first because you accept that you don’t mean anything. You believed that for a long time because your father started to tell you that. And it’s not true. You mean a lot to me. You mean a lot to Rhys. I love you, mating bond or not.”

I smiled at him. Finally, he had said something that I didn’t have to question or wonder about. I knew without a doubt that he was telling me the truth.

I took his hand and gently pulled him toward me. He dropped the apple and wrapped his arms around me. I snuggled into his body, feeling him next to me. 

“Maybe we should go back and help them come up with a plan,” I said to him.

“They’ll tell us what it is later,” he said. “Right now, I want to find out just how much submission you intend to give me.”

I raised an eyebrow. “I never agreed to submission.”

He leaned over and kissed my neck. I shivered.

“Upstairs,” he whispered, “Now.”

I glanced up and looked to see the window for his room. It was open. I flew up to the window and smiled as he launched up from the ground. I blushed at the look he gave me, backing me onto the bed.


	44. Mending Bridges

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucien goes to Morrigan to get her to help with the plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been having to rewrite large sections of this which is taking longer than I expected. I am hoping to work through some of the changes quickly and can get the rest of this posted. Apologies!

The idea was crazy but like most of Rhys’ ideas, it was just crazy enough that it might work. Since Belsar had never met Rhys, he had no idea that Rhys was part Illyrian. That would work to our advantage. 

The issues were going to be that we needed Mor, who was still not speaking to Rhys. That was my job today. I took a deep breath as I stood in front of her door. I knocked twice and held my breath.

“What do you want Lucien?” She looked annoyed but maybe not angry.

“Can I come in and talk to you for a few minutes?”

She frowned, as if she was thinking. Finally, she opened the door with a shrug. “I guess.”

I walked inside and tried to figure out where to sit because the place was a mess. I glanced around and after a moment Mor walked over to a chair and shifted the pile of stuff in it to the floor. “Have a seat. What is that about anyway?”

“Like you have to ask? Rhys sent me.”

“Obviously that dumb ass sent you.”

“Mor, come on. Rhys always has a reason for what he does.”

“Maybe so but what he did…” she shook her head as she trailed off. 

“So are you mad about Rhys or Myrrh?”

“Both.”

“Look, whatever Myrrh did, she had no control over it.”

“Lucien, the voice inside my head may not have been hers but I felt her power. I don’t know what she does and frankly, I don’t want to.”

“She’s just as scared about it as you.”

“How is that even possible? It’s her power.”

“Yes, and she has no control over it. It manifests when it wants to and usually when she least wants it to. I think Az is working on that with her.”

“Speaking of Azriel, I’m mad at him too.”

“What for? He didn’t do anything to you. And since when do you like males?” My question was less a question and more a statement of fact. She knew that I knew but it had never been discussed until now.

“I’ve slept with plenty of males,” she snapped back.

“I know all about the stories. But you aren’t interested in Az like that so why be mad at him.”

“He defended her.”

“He’s also her mate, so there’s a little bit of a blind spot there.”

Her jaw hit the floor. “He’s her what?”

“You heard me,” I rolled my eyes.

“How is that possible?”

“How should I know but after what I’ve seen, trust me. He is.”

“And she accepted the mating bond?”

“I don’t know anything about that, and I don’t want to. I do know that when we were younger they fell in love before that bond ever became known to anyone. I couldn’t even tell you when it happened. Azriel isn’t exactly forward with his feelings.”

“But after her parents, I didn’t think that she would ever accept a mating bond.”

“Well, all I know is that by the time Azriel came to live at Court, they were lovers. I can’t tell you anything about what else happened between them. And I don’t want to know. Myrrh is my friend and Az is… well, I just have no interest in what goes on between them.”

“So what about Tamlin? Wasn’t she supposed to marry him?”

“She was. I don’t know what would have happened if she hadn’t vanished that night. I think that Tamlin cared for her although not like Azriel does, obviously. She and Az are so alike in some ways.”

Mor raised her eyebrows at me.

“How well do you know Myrrh?”

“I’ve never bedded her, if that’s what you’re asking. And neither has Tamlin, as far as I know. But she’s been my friend since we were young and I care about her a great deal.”

Mor stood there with her arms crossed and said nothing. I waited.

“Lucien, I am furious at Rhys, I don’t know if I can talk with him.”

“Please remember something when it comes to Rhysand. He’s still very broken. He lived centuries believing his sister was dead and then all of a sudden, she was handed back to him. He’s trying to manage all of that the best he can, considering Amarantha messed his head up. And then he found out about her and Az.”

“Is that where that bruise came from?”

I chuckled. “Uh, yeah.”

“Still, the bastard didn’t even have it in him to talk with me first.”

I shrugged. “We both know that Rhysand isn’t known for his forethought and tact.”

“He could if he would slow down and think for a minute.”

“We’re talking about the High Lord of Night Court, right? Who got into fights as a kid because he didn’t think first, remember?”

Mor snorted but I took that as a good sign. “Do you honestly believe Rhys did it because he doesn’t care about you?”

“No. That’s not the point though. He knew full well it would hurt me.”

“He wants to fix it though, Morrigan. At least give him the chance to.”

Finally, she nodded. “I suppose.”

“So you’ll come with me?”

We walked slowly down the streets of Velaris, not really talking. Mor broke the silence first.

“Lucien, why does he refuse to let people see the good in him?”

I sighed. “Rhys has spent his whole life watching his father, training as an Illyrian, and protecting his sister. And then Amarantha happened. I don’t think that all of those things were good for him. He’s been hurt by a lot of people. Healing is slow and it takes time. He is making progress though. Thesan seems to see through his act. I know Tamlin knows better even though he won’t admit it now. Tarquin seems to have an idea that Rhys is putting up a front too. Males are stubborn though, Mor.”

“You want to tell me what I’m about to find when I get there?”

“Well, Myrrh is a shadowsinger but likely an extremely powerful one. There aren’t a lot of records on that kind of power. I wonder if she’s not more powerful than Rhys.”

Mor stared at me. “Shouldn’t she have the throne then?”

I shrugged again. “But she doesn’t want it and Rhys already has it. He does want her as part of his court, don’t mistake that.”

“Ok, so what kind of a plan is he cooking up?”

“Well, Scythia has a group of fae wandering through Prythian and they may pose a threat to us. We don’t know exactly why they’re here and I want to know what’s going on. So does Rhys. He’s trying to get information.”

“That sounds dangerous.”

“Isn’t it always with Rhys?”

Morrigan actually laughed. That was a very good sign. “What is this plan exactly?”

“That I don’t know yet. You’ll have to ask him.”

Morrigan sighed and stepped into the house, walking into the study where Rhys and Myrrh were talking. Rhys looked up and looked relieved to see that I had Mor with me. He didn’t say anything though, which I took as a good thing.

Mor looked right at Myrrh, watching her for a long while. I noticed that Az was leaning against a wall, arms crossed. As usual he was so still that I nearly missed him. Azriel’s attention was riveted on Morrigan. I wondered who would speak first.

“Morrigan, I apologize for what happened. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Myrrh’s voice was quiet and she sounded genuine. I realized that she truly had no idea how that had happened.

Mor nodded and turned to Rhys who was quietly watching. “I don’t know that I’ve forgiven you but Lucien tells me that you do need me to help with this ridiculous plan you’ve got.”

“I wouldn’t call it ridiculous. And Lucien doesn’t even know what it is, so he can’t call it ridiculous.” Rhys smiled.

Mor shook her head. “You really are a bastard.”

“So I’ve been told. Mor, you are my family, my blood. I care about you. I know that what I did would make you think otherwise. I really did have my reasons though.”

Mor stared at her cousin and I could tell that she was considering this. “Tell me the plan.”

Rhys glanced at Azriel who nodded. 

“We’re going to be spies,” Az told us. “Myrrh is going to go to Belsar and explain things with Feyre. I will be going along as a servant but truly to protect Feyre and Myrrh. Our goal is to find out what we can but convince Belsar that Illyrians are controlled slaves. If we can, we want to convince him to let us trade some slaves for information. Or steal information as the case may be.”

“You’re going alone with Feyre and Myrrh?”

Az nodded once.

“And Rhys is ok with this?”

Rhys shrugged. “I have faith that Feyre and Myrrh can control the situation.”

“And if they can’t?”

“That’s why Az will be there.”

Morrigan looked doubtful. I must have looked the same.

“We do have a backup plan,” said Rhys finally.

“And what is that?” asked Mor scornfully.

“Keir’s legions,” Rhys replied simply.

“So, basically, the plan is sweet talk him and if that doesn’t work scare the crap out of him?”

Rhys nodded.

Morrigan shook her head. “You’re going to need some help here.” And she sat down at the table.


End file.
